Colin Neil Turner

Thanks from me, Neil, for giving me a further look. You might find me helpful if you're looking for a general counsellor/therapist. You might also find me useful as an older, kink-friendly, neurodiverse-aware gay male.

Do get in touch to see how suitable you might find me.

As well helping you with the concern/s that have brought you here, you might also be interested that as well as my general skills and training I can help with:

• Anger Management.
• Anxiety.
• Depression.
• Family matters.
• Low Self Esteem (see also GSRD/LGBTQ+, and Kink/Power exchange).
• Self-Identity.
• Spirituality.
• Bereavement.
• Relationship Issues.
• Kink/ Power exchange.
• GSRD/LGBTQ+.
• Men's issues and Masculinity questions.

I can help you with any combination of these. I "walk the walk" with them as they brought me to my own counselling.  I know also what it's like to be in therapy, as I continue with my own, something that I think is important. 

I  can help you feel safe to approach the things that are getting at you through building up a relationship between us of affirming, non-judgemental trust.

I can fit into the demands of your daily life as I work online. We can have our sessions across Zoom, Skype, Google Meet or Microsoft Teams,  as well as WhatsApp on your mobile.

Around the Bridgend area we can also do Walk and Talk therapy. 

As I'm an "Integrative" counsellor, we have our disposal all the help from the three main approaches (Psychodynamic; Humanist/Person-Centred; CBT). I'm can also bring the discoveries of Attachment Theory and the research from MRI/PET-scan neuroscience. We tailor all this to you. 

It really is possible for you to change. Evidence shows that we can gradually change the responsive or behavioural pathways that previous experience and upbringing have laid down in our brains ("neuroplasticity").

Through work to increase awareness of these paths, and then gradually reshape them, counselling can offer practical hope for a range of challenges from phobias and deep trauma recovery, to depression, shame, anger, anxiety and many other conditions. 

This would be the ultimate goal of our meetings.

What would our counselling be like? 

Generally, the first couple of sessions often see the making of a safe space for personal talk and laying out, in the way that you want, what's brought you to counselling.

Together, respectfully and with compassion, we turn that over, noticing without judgement what effects it generates. If you feel that you want more "challenge" in this, we can tailor the intensity of the work accordingly. 

Very often around sessions 3/4 we start coming into contact with the sensitive boundaries of what's deep down really lying behind all this, and we can begin careful agreed work on healing it in accordance with the theories and practice mentioned above. 

Session 6 sees us reviewing how things have gone so far, and agreeing on what changes we feel are needed for any future sessions.

We repeat this every 6th Session, as agreed. 

If this seems like something you would like to try, or something that would suit you, please do get in touch. 

I look forward to hearing from you. 

I'm also interested in existential questions and issues of personal identity.

For background information, being an educated working-class gay man from the cusp of the  1960s, I came to terms with myself in the hostile '70s and '80s. As a result, I've long felt as if I live in two opposing worlds.

One reason is that my love has been illegal in the past. It has also been regarded as incompatible with my class identity. 

I also endured daily belittling casual racism as a young Welsh boy whose family moved into the (sometimes rural) English Southwest when I was 7.

Similarly, my attraction to my own sex made me an Outsider, while in the gay community many saw me as not "camp" enough to be genuine.

I have a non-English cultural perspective. This is bolstered by my living and working in Europe (Spain, Turkey) and the Middle East (Oman, Bahrain, Saudi Arabia), with resultant longstanding friends who live in Hinduism, Sunni and Shia Islam.

Added to this, my kink identity relates to fighting-related sexual expression. This is expressed in wrestling, but also grappling sports and to a lesser degree MMA and punch/striking sports/boxing.

Through these activities I have experience of male bonding/friendship. I've also witnessed how they can reduce loneliness/social isolation or awkwardness.

In addition, I have experience of how they can generate a sense of personal and/or social empowerment in gay males and females.

I can also testify to the helpfulness of martial arts, consensual safe fighting &/or wrestling for individual soothing or positive addressing of anger and other social/personal matters.

Related to this, as a late starter I have a brown belt in classical jiu jitsu (2018). I look forward (Autumn 2023) to returning to jitsu and wrestling (after a 5-year break due to studying) once a broken foot is healed. 

If you think I'm someone who might be able to help, I look forward very much to hearing from you. 

Fees payable via bank transfer or debit card. 

I work with females, males and non-binary clients.

I'm particularly interested in your needs as a male or if you count yourself as male, if you feel straight but enjoy having sex with other men, or if you count yourself as gay.

Masculinity-related issues, or identity issues are another interest (I live with my own). 

I'm in the kink/fetish community (I wrestle), and my CPD (above) includes Martial Arts and the Therapeutic Alliance. I achieved my brown belt in classical Jiu Jitsu in 2018 (after five years), although my studies have prevented me training regularly since then. At present I'm saving up with a view to either formal training in BDSM/power-exchange and therapy, or doing my MA research into wrestling and its psycho-emotive effects on Men who have Sex with Men (MSMs). 

I also compose what is possibly some fairly naff AOR music! :-)  with a view to releasing an album or albums. 

I'm a partnered, unmarried gay man who lives with physical and emotional/Learning Difficulty disabilities and neuro-diversity in the family.