Latest articles on counselling and therapy

Did you know that the state is taking more children away from their families than at any time since the 1980s? This startling fact was featured in The Economist Magazine earlier this year, but what exactly is being done about it? Some argue that deep spending cuts since 2010 have made it harder for the poorest families in society to cope. Councils are required to provide emergency child-protection but not to teach parenting skills, offer respite care or other services that could help struggling...

We often, albeit unconsciously, look to our current relationships to fulfil our deepest unfulfilled needs and longings, to plug the gaps in our psyches, and to heal where we have been wounded. In psychoanalysis, this is called ‘transference’. We unconsciously want from our intimate others what we were deprived in the past, often by our family of origin. We repeat the story but are secretly hoping for a different outcome. This sets an impossible task for our partners. After...

In contrast to what behavioural psychology schools promulgated during the 20th century, the human infant is not a tabula rasa (blank slate), but rather is born with inbuilt drives and needs. One of the most important drives is that of attachment to others and of engaging with the world. This is paramount in humans, since unlike other animal species, we are particularly vulnerable as newborns and cannot survive without the care of an adult that feeds and shelters us. A pioneering figure in the...

Life happens to you in the time between your therapy sessions. One hour a week with your therapist leaves 167 hours where you are out in the world, living your life. If therapy is going well for you, and you're getting to know yourself as a result, there may be times where you feel different, more awake to yourself and how you feel. This can be a confusing time, filled with ups, downs and revelations. The things you discussed in therapy often play themselves out as your days pass. You may be...

Is someone gaslighting you? Do you feel as if you’re tied in knots, not free to speak your mind or show how you feel? Does your partner insist that they love you, even though they continually put you down? Confusing? Does your partner disregard what you say or how you feel, so you find yourself on edge and think it best not to speak or show your feelings? This form of emotional abuse can lead to you feeling very troubled, unhappy, anxious and depressed. I have highlighted the main...

Growing old is something which, for most, is as natural a stage of life as adolescence, and it isn't easy! Although growing older is gradual, because there are sometimes significant health issues it can seem to happen suddenly, and that can be traumatic. Often it is a fall, which can result in broken bones which take longer to heal, therefore affecting mobility and independence. Even after recovery, there can be a loss of confidence. Sometimes it is a very serious event such as a stroke or...