Latest articles on counselling and therapy

Our pasts cannot be changed, that is true. We cannot go back in time. We may feel that the past is behind us and we have moved on in life, so it is easy to think ‘What is the point of thinking about it, let alone talking about it?’ And yet, our pasts can affect how we currently think, feel and behave. It is as if a part of the past still haunts the way we are, affecting how we react and feel inside.   We may find ourselves reacting to someone’s comments, rather than...

With A-level students due to collect their results on the 16th and GCSE results out on the 23rd, the next few weeks can be an anxious, stress-filled time for both teenagers and their families. Following the highly stressful weeks and months of mock exams, homework, and preparation, these in-between weeks can be an anxious time filled with nerves and what-ifs for not only the teens themselves but their parents and loved ones.

Taking this time to prepare before the big day can help not...

Most couples cite a lack of communication as the main cause of the breakdown in their relationship. When couples first meet they talk about everything, all the detail of their lives, shared and separate. Gradually over time, there is a change and they talk about things (the mortgage, the kids) rather than themselves or the relationship. Often there is a feeling of having drifted apart. Feeling secure in your relationship needs time and mature communication between you and your partner to...

If there is someone with narcissistic personality disorder in your life, and especially if they are a family member, their behaviour can have a big impact on you. Other articles here have discussed what narcissism is, how narcissists behave and how counselling can help, but I want to concentrate here on narcissistic parents and the problems they can bring. It is important first to bear in mind a few points: 1. Narcissism is on a continuum and people at the lower end of the spectrum will not...

I want to change the way you communicate, or at least the way you think about communication. Take a look at these examples and stick with me for a moment: Example one: A letter drops through your front door. You announce: “It’s just another bill!”. When you open it, you find that it’s not what you expected at all but is something completely different. Example two: How about this example of these two individuals in a relationship: Partner A: “I’m...

During summer holidays, Christmas and many other occasions, we find ourselves with family and friends where at least one person will have written an internal script giving everyone else a part in the drama with an expected outcome. I remember Christmas when I was young and I think my mother wrote scripts every year that went like this:

Husband gives me a romantic gift - perfume, lingerie or jewellery; certainly nothing very practical. Children don't wake up too early and all are delighted...

This is an expression that I use to describe a form of behaviour that is both manipulative and destructive, and if it is easily spotted you can break yourself from the destructive cycle. Hot is the use of intense emotion. This can take many forms; not all of the forms are negative, for example someone can be immensely hot by excessively lavishing another individual with praise, gifts or attention. Another, more destructive form of hot is where the individual will be intensely angry toward...

Travel. It presents an opportunity for rest and relaxation or a chance for exploring other exciting countries and cultures. However, travel can also be very stressful - not just in the planning stages but during the journey itself and adapting to a new environment upon arrival.

Did you know, mental health issues in travellers are very common? In fact, they are amongst the leading causes of ill health while travelling.

For this reason, consideration of your mental well-being during...