Paul Lipman - MBACP. Accred reg. - Individuals, Couples, & Parenting.
Should you wish you can find out in more detail how I can help by going to my website (above) or from the information below my profile.
Counselling for me is many things. Sometimes it's about coping strategies and supporting my clients through a tough time or loss, others want to change something about how they feel, think or behave, many are looking to be free of the past whilst some aren't sure exactly what they need,they just know they are struggling to be happy in their life or relationships. There really is nothing too small or too big to ask for help with.
You'll find I'm patient and calm by nature, have a compassionate and mature approach, knowing how some things are really tough to talk about and whilst I will help you with ideas and tools to reduce symptoms and which can also speed up meaningful change I won't come with ready made solutions or think i know what is right for you.
I have always seen my role as supporting and guiding my clients through counselling, enabling them to understand how their difficulties keep them stuck and with my help how to overcome them. My aim is always for my clients to be able to leave feeling confident in knowing how to maintain their well being long term.
What you get with me are real solutions, tailored help, experience with all kinds of relational,emotional and psychological issues and despite knowing "my stuff" I don't let that get in the way of offering a warm, open and collaborative relationship. What I truly believe makes the difference though, is that I've lived with and worked through my own anxieties and difficulties in counselling.
I know how big a step just getting to this point can feel and the thought of starting counselling can be daunting. For me I only asked when I was exhausted from putting on a brave face and felt confused because I wasn't used to not being able to cope. I was equally scared about someone really seeing how I felt and knowing what I was thinking. I also had no idea what counselling was about. So I might have some idea about how you could be feeling right now.
Yes counselling can be tough at times and also provide a valuable life line, change your life and relationships for the better and give you the tools to keep well and cope.
Some of the difficulties I'm regularly asked to help with:
- Marriage & Relationship difficulties (further details on my website or below)
- Anxiety and anxiety linked difficulties such as: (inc. Panic, Fear, Obsessions, Phobias, OCD,Addiction.)
- Trauma and PTSD
- Personality disorders including BPD.
- Bareavment & Loss.
- Depression or Low mood.
- Low self esteem/ confidence.
- Anger, Difficult behaviors & over reactions.
- Adults who continue to be affected by their childhood. (including abuse)
- General lack of identity or direction and purpose.
- Self harming
- Coping strategies.
All my clients get the same care and commitment which changed my life and if you would like to find out more about having counselling, have an initial discussion or ask me any questions before deciding if you wish to meet me, then please do call. I will make time for you.
An initial meeting is an informal discussion which gives you the opportunity to tell me about your difficulties, for me to explain how I can help and after which you can decide if you think counselling with me will be helpful for you.
Training, qualifications & experience
I am a Registered Member of The British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy, on the professional standards authority, accredited register.
I gained my experience over the years from helping with all kinds of difficulties alongside my practice in those National counselling organisations I have been invited to assist. In the first five primarily focusing on those with extreme anxiety, depression, anger, working through a loss and those in difficult relationships and in the next I've e gained a broad and in-depth knowledge helping with all kinds of difficulties for other health care professionals such as counsellors, those in the NHS and in The Forces. as well as in my own practice.I have also continued with advanced training in a range of areas which include: couples, anxiety linked conditions, depression, panic related difficulties, trauma and PTSD.
- Academic Diploma in Integrative Counselling.
- WPF Certificate in Psycho-dynamic counselling
- Child development and behaviors
- Relational Development and Personal Communication
- Trauma and recovery
- Person Centred, Transctional Analysis, Gestalt and Relational counselling.
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
- Depression, anxiety, anger, self-harm, eating disorders, attachment disorders, loss and grief, phobias, panic, sexuality, abuse, self harm, obsessions, addiction, post traumatic stress, Bipolar and Asperger syndrome.
- Bereavement Counselling.
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and Trauma. (PTSD)
Specialist training by Babette Rothschild, one of the worlds foremost leading experts and authors in treating Trauma and PTSD. This means I understand the Autonomic Nervous System which is vital in choosing safe approaches.
BACP Accredited - Couples , Relationships & Communication
See my website for full details..
Anger Programs/ Courses
I have run Police funded Anger management courses for a Southern based counselling organisation.
BACP Accredited - Creativity
Working with: Arts, imagery, visualization, role play, body language and mindfulness techniques.
Other (experiential training)
- Group Therapy / Psycho educational workshops
- Gestalt systemic and family constellation therapy.
- Gestalt experiential therapy
- Gestalt Group facilitation and coaching
Areas of counselling I deal with
- Affairs and betrayals
- Anger management
- Anorexia nervosa
- Antisocial personality disorder
- Asperger's syndrome
- Attachment disorder
- Avoidant personality disorder
- Binge-eating disorder
- Bipolar disorder
- Borderline personality disorder
- Bulimia nervosa
- Dependent personality disorder
- Eating disorders
- Emotional abuse
- Family issues
- Feeling sad
- Generalised anxiety disorder
- Histrionic personality disorder
- Internet addiction
- Low self-confidence
- Low self-esteem
- Narcissistic personality disorder
- Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD)
- Obsessive-compulsive personality disorder
- Panic disorder
- Paranoid personality disorder
- Passive aggressive behaviour
- Personality disorders
- Physical abuse
- Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
- Postnatal depression
- Relationship problems
- Separation and divorce
- Sex addiction
- Sex problems
- Sexual abuse
- Suicidal thoughts
- Work-related stress
Other areas of counselling I deal with
Marriage and Relationships
Many who come to see me often feel hurt, misunderstood, frustrated and feel distant from each other. Counselling though can make a positive difference and many go on to enjoy a relationship which is stronger than if they had never had their difficulties.
I have no interest in taking sides or judging what has happened; and whilst there is is no road map to a successful relationship what I do know is that when we can communicate effectively and in respectful ways and replace "judgment" with understanding ourselves and each other more deeply, answers to even the most difficult problems can be found.
I will create a calm and safe space and help you:
- Relate to relate to each other in ways that develop warmth and love and allow you to feel good about yourself and each other.
- How to keep the fun and intimacy in your relationship and wanting each other.
- Ways of approaching conversations and being with each other which can repair hurts and wounds, enabling you to feel safe and trust each other.
- To be able to work together with your different personalities and sensitivities in ways which fulfill your needs without becoming a bone of contention or competitive.
- Understand the role your history can play in your relationship and how any negative coping patterns keep you stuck in negative cycles.
- Ways to understand each other and find solutions during even the most difficult conversations without them breaking down or escalating into arguments.
- How to create "win" - "win" outcomes.
Caterham (CR3) - Situated in a peaceful location 250 meters from Caterham main line station and the High Street.
Banstead (SM7) - A modern confidential space situation within 200 meters of Banstead High Street and 8 miles from Caterham.
- Individuals - £55 / 60 minutes.
- Couples - £70/ 60 minutes. (longer appointments available if required)
- I also offer appointments in Bromley on a Wednesday from 3pm to 9pm - £60 for 55 minutes.
- Group counselling can be cheaper and more effective
- Addiction - asking the right question can really help you
- How transference affects your relationship
I am committed to providing effective and safe help and in achieving that I:
- Retain Professional indemnity insurance
- Abide by and go beyond the BACP Code of ethics
- Commit to ongoing professional development, keeping up with the latest advances and knowledge.
- Collaborate with other professionals if helpful, without breaking confidentiality
- Have professional clinical supervision to ensure I offer effective therapy and which is a BACP requirement.
- Never help outside my area of competence or experience.
Maps & Directions
Type of session
|Face to face counselling:||Yes|
I offer weekday appointments from 9am to 8:30pm ( last appointment) and on some Saturday mornings.
Types of client