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This professional is accepting new clients but may have a waitlist. Please enquire with them directly to discuss availability.
Firstly, it is important to know that coming to therapy is NOT your fault, or just one of you if you are coming as a couple or two; we only know what is learnt and, from the cradle to the grave, we are in relationship with ourselves and with others.
Individual Counselling and Psychotherapy
Every experience you have had to date has helped you write the story of your life. From this story, you have created beliefs about yourself, and how you relate to yourself, and within the world. Yet have you ever stopped to think about where that story comes from? Whose words you hear? A further thought - maybe you are letting an outdated story define who you are today, how you feel about yourself or how you relate in relationship?
Can you imagine being free to choose for yourself and being in control of what you internalise from others? A life where you can feel as important as others and one where you do not need to fear failure, feel shame, be superior, or to control others? Where you can 'just' be you? Read on if this sounds like what you want......
Reasons you may be seeking individual therapy: -
A past or current life event is causing you a level of pain, i.e., relationship, work or family issue.
A loss or bereavement such as a death, separation, divorce, estrangement, redundancy, etc has you feeling lost at sea.
You are experiencing feelings of loneliness, depression, anxiety, shame or guilt; all of which can be hard to live with if you have not learnt how to process and accept these more unpleasant feelings.
Childhood experiences may be impacting you, i.e., your attachment style, adverse childhood experience, trauma, abuse, neglect, rejection sensitivity, fear of not being liked, fear of not feeling good enough, etc. Which can all contribute to struggling with life today.
'Symptoms' of your life may be challenging you, i.e., perfectionism, withdrawal, social anxiety, low self-esteem, fearful, etc.
Alcohol, or another behaviour, is tying you in knots and you are sick and tired of being sick and tired (and if you have a food addiction, you may find you are actually physically purging!).
Couple Counselling and Psychotherapy
The reason you are seeking couple counselling will generally fall into 3 categories -
- To grow, develop or change your relationship.
- To make a decision about your relationship.
- To separate amicably.
(Please note options 1 and 2 I work with yet I do not offer separation only counselling)
Reasons you may be seeking couple counselling could be: -
- Conflict / arguing / difference
- Relationship changes (e.g. marriage, parenting, miscarriage, IVF, family death)
- Affairs / betrayal / infidelity / low level of trust
- Attachment issues (avoidance / neediness in relationship)
- Lack of intimacy / sex life
- Communication and difference
- Loss of ability to talk to one another
- Addiction (alcohol, porn, etc.)
- Rejection / abandonment
- Withdrawal of one (or both) partners
- Unpleasant feelings (fear, sadness, resentment, anger, jealousy, etc.)
- Baggage from old relationships / past entering relationship (e.g. trust, trauma, abuse, etc.)
- Family of origin conflict
Benefits of Counselling for Individuals, Couples or Twos
· Be comfortable in your own skin!
· Work through archaic patterns which no longer serve you
· Find healthier ways of relating for you, today
· Improve, what I call, the self's, i.e., self-esteem, self-confidence, self-worth, self-love, self-awareness, self-improvement, etc.
· Recovery from, and healing of, past / current trauma
· Move from self-criticism to self-compassion
· Discover the impact of your childhood on the person you are today and how your attachment style continues to inform you
· Work on communication skills leading to improved relationships
· Embrace that it is 'ok to not be ok'.
· Create new opportunities
· Altered outlook
· Build a life where you feel energised, enthused and contented (most of the time!)
I will be the person who has your back, roots for you, and cheerleads you along your journey to a more harmonious way fo living. Together we will look at outdated patterns which no longer serve you. We will work on you self-trusting and knowing that you are worthy of connection. As an individual, couple or two, you are worthy of experiencing secure safe relationship and a life where you live and are not merely existing.
Does that sound too good to true? If you said no, great, you are here as you know you can have this life. If you answered yes, then I will keep the hope for you until this becomes your lived reality. What I need from you is HOW - Honesty, Openmindedness and a Willingness to different action.
This will mean looking at what informs your perspective, looking at how you have learnt to be in the world, and introducing new ways of looking at things. In a nutshell, we look at 'back then' to see how it informs how you are living now.
Who I work with
I work with individuals (age 18+), couples and two's. My areas of interest include:-
Relationship issues for individuals, couples and two's:- Communication, difference, infidelity / affairs / betrayal, arguing, disempowerment, resentment, conflict, trust issues, family issues, dissatisfaction, co-dependency, trauma, etc. (relationship includes intimate, family, work and friends).
Bereavement and loss:- Grief, death, death by suicide, role changes, childhood trauma/neglect, abuse, loss of purpose, redundancy, pet death, etc.
Alcohol addiction / alcohol dependency / alcoholism:- psycho-education around alcohol, family work, 12 step work, children of alcoholic parents, etc.
Binge eating disorder:- Emotional eating, excessive food use, food used in a self-harming way.
Plus general counselling with others such as:-anger management (although I prefer to call this anger expression ); mental health issues (anxiety, depression, loneliness, isolation, low mood, etc.); unpleasant feelings (unable to cope, overwhelmed or unprocessed trauma); work challenges (stress, burnout, feeling dissatisfied, redundancy, assertiveness, unfulfilment, career change, etc.) and personal issues (low self-esteem, low self-confidence, self-criticism, mid-life crisis, loss of sense of direction, stuckness, self-loathing, etc.). These all impact the relationship you have with yourself and others.
My current availability
Can be found in the 'fees and availability' section.
I see client's in person at my home in Alfold in the 'office in the garden'. This is a south facing conservatory which has a lovely outlook (see photos) where you can hear the sound of running water amongst calmness.
For online and telephone work, I work from an upstairs office to ensure confidentiality.
Training, qualifications & experience
BACP Accredited Counsellor and Psychotherapist. Qualified in individual and couples / marriage work.
BA Hons and Foundation Degree in Counselling.
Over 35 years' experience of working with people and relationship gained in the corporate and mental health sectors. The last 20 years working with mental health and the last 11 years as a psychotherapist / counsellor. A successful independent full-time private practice for 9 years.
Passionate, friendly, honest and empathic counsellor, psychotherapist and relationship practitioner.
Firm believer in 'I'm ok, You're ok*' and it being our work together that creates change as you are the expert on you.
Private Practice Counselling
Face to face + walk and talk therapy - www.harmoniouscounselling.com
Online + telephone counselling - www.relationshipcounsellingonline.com
Voluntary counsellor at Sam Beare hospice working with bereaved carers and families. Voluntary work at RASASC working with rape, sexual assault and sexual abuse (both men and women).
Qualifications - Qualified in Individual and Couple Work
- BA (Hons) in Counselling (University of Greenwich)
- Foundation Degree in Integrative Counselling (University of Greenwich)
- BACP Accredited Registered Member (093164)
- NCFE 1 - Interpersonal Skills
- NCFE 2 - Counselling (Helping) Skills
- NCFE 3 - Counselling Skills Theory
- Graduate of The Developmental Model of Couples Therapy Training under Ellyn Bader Ph.D. at The Couples Institute (integrating Attachment Theory, Differentiation Theory and Neuroscience)
- Advanced Certificate in Relationship Therapy (College of Sexual and Relationship Therapists, COSRT)
- Introduction to use of Attachment Theory When Working With Couples (International Attachment Network)
- Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) Workshop
- Moving Your Practice Online (Online Therapy Institute)
- How to do counselling online: A Coronavirus Primer (Open University and BACP course)
Walk and Talk Therapy
- Walk and Talk - Therapy In The Outdoors (Creative Counsellors)
As part of continued professional development keeping training up to date by attending regular additional training / workshops.
Being registered/accredited with a professional body means an individual must have achieved a substantial level of training and experience approved by their member organisation.
BACP is one of the UK’s leading professional bodies for counselling and psychotherapy with around 60,000 members. The Association has several different categories of membership, including Student Member, Individual Member, Registered Member MBACP, Registered Accredited Member MBACP (Accred) and Senior Registered Accredited Member MBACP (Snr Acccred).
Registered and accredited members are listed on the BACP Register, which shows that they have demonstrated BACP’s recommended standards for training, proficiency and ethical practice. The BACP Register was the first register of psychological therapists to be accredited by the Professional Standards Authority (PSA).
Accredited and senior accredited membership are voluntary categories for members who choose to undertake a rigorous application and assessment process to demonstrate additional standards around practice, training and supervision.
Individual members will have completed an appropriate counselling or psychotherapy course and started to practise, but they won’t appear on the BACP Register until they've demonstrated that they meet the standards for registration. Student members are still in the process of completing their training.
All members are bound by the BACP Ethical Framework and a Professional Conduct Procedure.
Accredited register membership
The Accredited Register Scheme was set up in 2013 by the Department of Health (DoH) as a way to recognise organisations that hold voluntary registers which meet certain standards. These standards are set by the Professional Standards Authority (PSA).
This therapist has indicated that they belong to an Accredited Register.
Areas of counselling I deal with
Other areas of counselling I deal with
Counselling and Psychology Students / Trainees
I am integratively trained in the Clarkson 5 Relational Model and welcome hearing from you as I am passionate about working with counselling students and feel it is an honour to be chosen to be on your journey of discovery with you.
Walk and Talk Therapy / Outdoor Therapy / Ecotherapy
Being located in Alfold, means I have easy access to the countryside. 45 minute walks are available from two locations in my area.
Utilising nature as part of therapy gives a grounding experience. Exercise and movement boosts endorphins offering a break from sitting therapy.
£45.00 - £80.00
Free initial in-person, telephone or online session
Concessions offered for
Initial 60 minute session: complimentary for individuals and £40 for couples (due to pre-assessment work).
An initial session enables the taking of a brief history and for us to discuss your goals in counselling and how we would work together moving forward. This is offered when there is a regular weekly appointment time that suits you.
All sessions are 60 minutes, rather than 50 minutes, and costs are:-
Individual counselling - £60
Couple counselling - £80
Counselling students - £45
(my modality is Clarkson Five Relational Model)
Employee Assisted Programme:-
I am an BUPA, Aviva, AXA and Vitality Health Recognised psychotherapist and counsellor.
(please add £10 to all 60 minute session prices for administration purposes for EAPs).
If you are insured with any of these companies you will need to follow their instructions (contacting them, providing me with your policy number and details of how many sessions have been approved).
When I work
*Update 21 February*
Clients come and go. Please feel free to contact me with your own availability and whether you are wanting f2f, online or telephone therapy.
I am fully insured, have an up-to-date enhanced DBS check and I am ICO registered (GDPR).
I am a Petruska Clarkson Five Relationship Model trained relational counsellor and integrate four different approaches:- person centred, psychodynamic, existential and cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT). I offer a flexible way of working centred on you, the client(s).
My approach includes reflection on the past, creative work, mindfulness, visualisations, drawing, poetry, etc. as all can provide a way of accessing the unconscious mind.