Ingrid Koehler, Counsellor, couples and Iindividuals

About me

I have had a private counselling practice in Totnes since 2011 and continue to practise in central Totnes. I have a background in nursing in the NHS having worked in the specialty of cancer for many years.

It takes courage to recognise that we need help when we are in distress and help to deal with a problem that we can't work out for themselves. Counselling can help us see the bigger picture. Distress ranges from stress and anxiety about things in life: feelings of being out of control; feeling a sense of being overwhelmed or confused, depressed or sad, even for no definable reason; feeling hurt or vulnerable, angry, frustrated, desperate, or needy because of particular circumstances or our life history. It can also show up as being very emotional all the time or just as a feeling of flatness and pointlessness and as a ‘nervous breakdown’. Guilt, shame and regret also can deeply affect us and having physical pain, chronic ailments and poor health take their toll. All forms of distress can affect our well-being and relationships.

Counselling is very effective for trauma. More is known now about the long-term effects of trauma, whether it be from emotional abuse and protracted neglect, or by being shocked, horrified or terrified. We can be impacted by a particular event, which may even be in the distant past. Also, the effects of long-term grief and loss and can damage our wellbeing.

My approach is of unconditional acceptance and non-judgemental understanding of all that you are, and want to talk about at your pace and according to your level of comfort, in a safe space of caring, trust, confidentiality and safety. Counselling brings new insights and awareness of our problems, behaviour and distress, and it can help us to develop compassion and empathy for ourselves.

I work with individuals and couples in order to help them to look at relationship difficulties. I want both women and men to understand one another in order to create loving partnership. I believe that understanding the differences between women and men is critical in order for healthy relationships. My work with couples is based on the model of Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT), as developed by Dr Sue Johnson. It is a collaborative, structured, usually short-term therapy approach.