Matilde Tomat - The Resting Tree - IB, Dip.Couns., MBACP
Welcome to The Resting Tree Counselling & Healing Service
- It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living.
- I want to know what you ache for
- and if you dare to dream
- of meeting your heart’s longing.
- It doesn’t interest me how old you are.
- I want to know if you will risk
- looking like a fool
- for love
- for your dream
- for the adventure of being alive.
- It doesn’t interest me what planets are
- squaring your moon...
- I want to know if you have touched
- the centre of your own sorrow
- if you have been opened by life’s betrayals
- or have become shrivelled and closed
- from fear of further pain.
- I want to know if you can sit with pain
- mine or your own
- without moving to hide it
- or fade it, or fix it.
- I want to know if you can be with joy
- mine or your own
- if you can dance with wildness
- and let the ecstasy fill you
- to the tips of your fingers and toes
- without cautioning us
- to be careful, to be realistic
- to remember the limitations
- of being human.
- It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true.
- I want to know if you can disappoint another
- to be true to yourself.
- If you can bear the accusation of betrayal
- and not betray your own soul.
- If you can be faithless, and therefore trustworthy.
- I want to know if you can see Beauty
- even when it is not pretty, every day.
- And if you can source your own life from its presence.
- I want to know if you can live with failure
- yours and mine
- and still stand at the edge of the lake
- and shout to the silver of the full moon,
- It doesn’t interest me to know where you live
- or how much money you have.
- I want to know if you can get up
- after the night of grief and despair
- weary and bruised to the bone
- and do what needs to be done
- to feed the children.
- It doesn’t interest me who you know
- or how you came to be here.
- I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire
- with me
- and not shrink back.
- It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom
- you have studied.
- I want to know what sustains you from the inside
- when all else falls away.
- I want to know if you can be alone
- with yourself
- and if you truly like the company you keep
- in the empty moments.
“The Invitation” by Oriah © Mountain Dreaming,
This is also my invitation to you. If you feel that you are stuck, overwhelmed, drained; that Life seems to be going on without you; that everything happens somewhere else “out there”, and that you are not in touch with whatever is “in here”, you have already done “half the job”: you are aware.
Healing begins with awareness, and hence your healing has begun. What you might need now is support.
I am not promising that it’s going to be an easy ride, but only that I am willing to walk alongside you. Therapy is not an easy fix, selling you a dream, nor presenting you with a temporary status of pleasure. Therapy, for me, is an emotional and challenging, exciting and stimulating, and compassionate journey in discovering who you really are, what you truly want in life, and what makes YOU happy.
Therapy means change.
From a caterpillar to a butterfly, from ashes to a phoenix, from an acorn to an oak.
There is a quote from a movie I watched lately which somehow summarises the basic concept behind any session: “You’re an emotional jigsaw, you need to piece yourself back together. Start with the corners; and look for the blue bits.” I will only be providing a large-enough table, time, and support while you create your own puzzle. I will be the catalyst for your change, a facilitator.
“I don’t consider myself a counsellor or a therapist; I see myself more of a facilitator, a catalyst of change. My approach is definitely eclectic.” As an eclectic and existential therapist I will bring theory, archetypes, art, journalling, spirituality, philosophy, exercises and images.
I will also ask you to write, extensively. Journalling is part of what it means to work with me.
In order to achieve this, I promise you I will be congruent, authentic, at times challenging (I know…) but still genuine; and at all times within the boundaries of my profession, because it is within those well-defined boundaries that your healing towards a self-reliant, autonomous, and self-actualised beautiful You, can take place. I will not direct you, but I will be directional; open, frank, purposeful and interactional.
So, Welcome to The Resting Tree, my name is Matilde. And you are…
- Matilde’s workshop series is inspirational and has enabled me to gain a deeper, more comprehensive and probing insight into my history of addiction, but more importantly a greater clarity around my choices for a healthier, self-actualising future life pathway.
- Matilde possesses a special gift, a razor sharp empathic awareness of our individual struggles, an emotional intuition, a particular form of sensitivity and insight into the depths of human vulnerability.
- Dear Matilde, thank you so much for your time and effort over the last seven weeks. I’ve really enjoyed working with you and I have learned so much about life but most of all I’ve learned about myself.
Working with / towards: Please, see below.
Training, qualifications & experience
- Introduction to Family Therapy (ongoing training)
- L4 Diploma in Therapeutic Counselling – CPCAB
- L3 Certificate in Counselling Studies – CPCAB
- L2 Certificate in Counselling Skills – CPCAB
- Grade 1 – Nichiren Buddhism
- RRR – Recovery Coach
- Celebrate Recovery Leaders Training (with John Baker)
- 12 Steps : Christian, Buddhist, Zen, Mindfulness
- Perfect Daughters – Adult Daughters of Alcoholics
- MindMapping for Happiness
- Branding & Lovemarks : a new you
- Art Therapy, Journalling, Scrapbooking
- Quality Decision Making
- Therapeutic Journalling
- Public Speaking
- Chaplaincy – course sponsored by the Buddhist Healthcare Chaplaincy Group including hospital placement hours
- In-house L1 – Eating Disorders
- In-house L2 – Eating Disorders
- Book: "The Men at My White Table, a Collection", available on Amazon Kindle, celebrates 20 years of a creative life and explores pain and personal awareness in 5 short stories, photographic images and poetry
Areas of counselling I deal with
- Eating disorders
- Low self-confidence
- Low self-esteem
- Personality disorders
- Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
Other areas of counselling I deal with
I have noticed during my experience that I tend to be found by clients who need to:
- work on the main 4 existential questions: chance, death, unreliability of people, uncertainty of the future
- work on that deep rooted sense of loneliness, sadness, anguish and heartache, emotional pain and weight they are carrying around within them
- let go of emotional pain (especially within families where there is/was addiction)
- release addiction, including smoking
- work towards a personalised Wellness Recovery Action Plan (WRAP)
- heal the past / childhood trauma (including physical and sexual violence)
- heal sexual abuse (including incest) and violence (including traumatic/criminal death) in childhood
- heal a relationship (birth family, marriage, work)
- understand the difference between temporal and everlasting happiness
- explore and work with the Inner Child
- go through a divorce or break-up
- connect to a higher purpose / meaning / significance
- ease grieve / bereavement / discuss and explore the significance of Death
- facilitate one’s own passing
- feel more in touch with the Divine / sense of divine
- practice mindfulness and awareness
- understand / cope / live with anxiety and panic attacks
- assistance while going through a phase of emotional (fertile) emptiness, transitions, menopause, crisis (spiritual and not)
- explore in various ways Erikson’s stages of psycho-social development
I have also noticed that particularly lately most of my clients come to me with questions regarding:
- personal morality vs professional ethics
- meaning / value / purpose of life
- sense of fulfillment
- inconsistency of belief system
- practical vs theoretical congruency
Photos & videos
Fees per 50 therapeutic minutes (new fees as Mon 15 Jan 2018)
£35 adults – first session: £20 which includes free initial consultation
Adults: 1 free session when pre-booking a series of 10 (total of £300)
£25 students with proof of attendance for the course (max 10 hours)
Archetypes and Tarot tester : £20 for 20 minutes
Telephone Counselling : £35 per session to be pain online in advance
Please, be also aware that details re. the new series of workshops and training in Nelson can be found on the Facebook page and on the website.
I do work with adults and on a one-to-one basis, from home, unless otherwise agreed:
- I see clients only if they have previously pre-booked the session with me; please, be mindful of the time which is dedicated only to you and arranged in a way to protect both your privacy, other clients, and my family members;
- I will not tolerate any form of verbal and / or physical abuse and / or aggressive behaviour in any shape, form or measure. You cannot, under any circumstances, attend sessions while under the influence of drugs or alcohol. You will not be able to access the premises if under the influence of any substance, including heavy medication;
- My fundamental values follow BACP’s ones. These are defined to protect both of us, in our therapeutic relationship, and also my own premises:
a. Respecting human rights and dignity;
b. Alleviating symptoms of personal distress and suffering;
c. Enhancing people's well-being and capabilities;
d. Improving the quality of relationships between people;
e. Protecting the safety of clients;
f. Ensuring the integrity of practitioner-client relationships;
For anyone who is interested, I do offer outdoor counselling and hence assisting you in exploring your story and pain while immerse in nature (fees to be agreed depending on location); and walk&talk experience, especially when coupled with mindfulness breathing and walking, mostly along the Leeds/Liverpool Canal.
At home, I do mostly share my space with Virginia, a cat. She won't be participating to the sessions, but please bear this in mind if you are allergic.
Should I not be able to answer the phone, please do leave a message or send a text and I will contact you as soon as possible. I will then send you via email directions and contract.
I am available to be booked for week-end workshops or group work.
As a member of the BACP I do abide by and deeply believe in its Ethical Framework in working with you, for your own wellness, at your pace, and within those well-defined boundaries, creating a safe island where healing can take place. I am fully insured, supervised (both on a one-to-one basis and also within a group supervision). I am also E – CRB checked, and I do respect my own Continuing Professional Development.
Maps & Directions
Type of session
|Face to face counselling:||Yes|
Mon - Fri --- 9am - 8pm
Types of client