University. Not for everyone.
Finding yourself in a situation where you are back at home because your time at University hasn't worked out, can be hugely challenging. Chances are that you went with the best of intentions, believing that it was what you wanted to do, along with most if not all of your friends, never doubting your decision. So to discover that the reality, was stress, anxiety and feeling deeply unhappy, can be a massive shock to the system. The feeling of failure can be immense and a very heavy burden to carry.
It's not unusual for the stress of being there and feeling out of your depth, to result in isolating yourself, not eating properly or to feel as if you are constantly just keeping your head above water.
Often the first term will be struggled through, and it might be that when you went home for Christmas, your family noticed that something wasn't right, or maybe you just couldn't face going back. Young people can feel that their whole future rests upon going to University, so it is all too easy for despair or depression to set in once they are again back home, and their friends are not around because they are at University. There can also be feelings of guilt, for the outlay of any money by Parents.
This is a time for real self-care and self-reflection. Being able to come to terms with the fact that it's OK to take time out, to take a step back and re-evaluate what you really want to do, taking pressure out of the equation. It's a time for taking all those 'shoulds' out of the conversation, and just concentrate on getting well.
However supportive and understanding parents are being, counselling can be a time and a place just for you, where you can work through all the feelings, thoughts and possible confusion that you are experiencing. A space for you to discuss, explore, and work with your counsellor, to gradually find a way forward.
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About Isabel Fulcher
I work in private practice and am passionate about the benefits and healing properties of talking therapies, both because of my own experiences and all my one-to one client work.