A dozen tips for undergoing midlife changes

When I was a young girl, I thought menopause was about hot flashes and mood swings. I didn't know that it was a time of transformation and renewal. But now that I'm in my fifties, I've learned that change is everywhere — in our bodies, our minds, our relationships with others, and even the world around us. We need to embrace these changes because they're part of life's journey.


Here are some tips on how you can embrace menopause.

Acknowledge that these changes are hard and demanding

Menopause is a natural process, but it's still a time of transition. Most women experience menopause around 50, but it can occur as early as 40 or later than 60. During this time, you may experience physical and emotional changes like hot flashes, night sweats and vaginal dryness. Additionally, your outlook on life will probably change; you may find yourself becoming more introspective or reflecting on what's important in life with your partner or children.

If you're feeling overwhelmed by these changes, see your doctor for help managing your symptoms throughout this period of growth!

Change the way you think about ageing

One of the first things to understand about midlife changes is that ageing is a natural process. We all age, but we don't all age at the same rate. Ageing is not a disease, it's not a crisis and it's not a tragedy. Ageing happens to everyone – which means you're never alone in your journey through this phase of life!

If you've been thinking that you're behind on the ageing curve or that maybe there's something wrong with how well or slowly (or quickly) your body is ageing, try changing how you think about ageing instead of trying to change how fast your body ages. This will help relieve some pressure off yourself and give you freedom from worrying about what others think about what stage of life they are at compared to themselves - or even comparing them against other people who are younger than them!

Seek support

One of the most important things you can do is to seek support. Talk to your partner, family, and friends about what you are going through. They may not know how to help initially, but they will want to be there for you as you go through this difficult time.

If necessary, find a trusted psychotherapist who will listen without judgment and provide practical advice when needed. Psychotherapy is primarily a space for getting to know yourself, and in times of change is important to keep track of what is essential and what is not. You may be going through a difficult time, but know that you are not alone. There are many people who have gone through the same things and come out stronger on the other side. Seek help from others and support groups if necessary. You can do this!

If possible, join a support group with others who are experiencing similar issues in midlife. This can help increase your self-esteem by seeing that other people have similar experiences and feelings about themselves at this stage of life; it also provides an opportunity for learning from others’ mistakes as well as sharing coping skills that may be helpful in dealing with midlife changes effectively.

Make a list of people or professionals you can call on when feeling down friends or close family members; their phone numbers or addresses; professional therapists (if any) who have helped them in the past — the more concrete information available now is better than none later!

Take a break from yourself by doing something for someone else

The best way to deal with midlife changes is by taking time out of your busy schedule to help someone else.

You can help someone less fortunate than you or someone going through a difficult time, but helping others doesn't have to involve money. There are many ways that even the busiest people can find a few spare moments each week to help another person.

For example, if you're feeling overwhelmed by your own midlife changes, volunteer for something community-oriented like cleaning up litter or picking up trash along roadsides — even small acts like this can make a big difference in someone else's life!

Don't punish yourself for your lack of motivation

One of the major challenges that we face as we are undergoing midlife changes is self-punishment. We may punish ourselves for our lack of motivation, for not exercising, or for not dressing better. We may punish ourselves every day, in fact.

We need to be kind to ourselves during this time and stop judging ourselves so harshly. It's fine if we don't feel like working out if our clothes don't fit quite right anymore, if we aren't motivated to go out with friends all the time (or ever). It doesn't mean that everything is "wrong" with us; rather, it's just part of being human during a life transition.

If you find yourself constantly criticising yourself for something about which there really isn't anything wrong at all—such as your hair colour—try these tips instead:

Practice mindfulness to build resilience

Mindfulness is the practice of being fully present in the moment without judgment or expectation. It's a way to build resilience by learning how to handle stressful situations and emotions without acting reflexively. You can use mindfulness to process your emotions, which will help you make healthier decisions; for example, mindful eating means slowing down and really tasting your food instead of gorging on ice cream when you're stressed out about work.

Mindfulness also helps you notice your thoughts and feelings without judging yourself for them (e.g. "I'm feeling sad right now")—which can help you separate yourself from those feelings and make decisions based on facts rather than emotion (e.g. "My neighbour just got engaged").

Talk to yourself as if you were talking to a friend

If you're feeling stuck in your midlife changes, try talking to yourself as if you were talking to a friend.

Talk to yourself in a positive way

Remember that the person who needs encouragement is not the only person who needs encouragement. You are also the one who needs some love, support, and wisdom at this point in your life. If you were talking to a good friend who was going through changes like yours (and possibly being hard on themselves), how would you respond? What would you say? Would you tell them they are doing everything right or wrong? Would you give them advice on how they should handle things differently?

You may want to write down what comes up for both of these questions so that later when things get tough again, there will be an easy way for you to know what kind of help and support is needed most during this transition stage.

Remind yourself that it's not just you who feels this way

You are not alone. Menopause is a normal part of ageing, and many women and men experience it. It’s also important to remember that everyone feels the stress of midlife changes differently. For example, some people feel depressed for a few months, while others may experience these emotions for several years. Regardless of how long your midlife change lasts, it's still important to remember that you're not alone in this process.

Talking with someone about how you're feeling is one way that we can cope with anxiety or depression surrounding our own midlife changes — and this includes talking with friends and family members as well as medical professionals (such as counsellors). Talking allows us to share our feelings with others who care about us and helps us gain support from those around us, so we don't feel isolated during difficult times.

Be aware of little things that bring you joy and cultivate them

By knowing what makes you happy, you can bring more of it into your life.
If this sounds like a good idea, how does one do it? The first step is to focus on the positive. Set little goals for yourself so that you can experience the feeling of accomplishment.

Setting goals is a great way to keep yourself motivated. We’ve all heard the adage that “if you aim for nothing, you’ll hit it every time.” This is not true when it comes to setting goals for yourself. Setting small goals along the way will help you feel like you are accomplishing something each day, which can be especially helpful when trying to adjust your lifestyle during midlife changes such as retirement or empty nest syndrome.

For example: If you want to resume regular exercise after years of being sedentary, start by simply walking around your neighbourhood once per week with friends or family members who may be starting out themselves (or with someone who has already been exercising regularly).

Once this becomes easy and enjoyable, set another goal, such as walking two miles instead of one mile per day over the course of four days per week (two days for resting muscles), then eventually increase the distance covered until hitting five miles per day at some point in time—perhaps even increasing speed as well if possible.

Find some creative outlet that makes you feel proud of yourself

It could be photography, painting, singing in the shower, writing a blog post, or learning to knit. If you can find a creative outlet that makes you feel proud of yourself and your accomplishments, it can help to improve your self-esteem and well-being.

Getting started with something new can be tough when there are so many things going on in life, but taking small steps toward a goal is always the best way to get results.

You could try: cooking classes, improv comedy classes (if you’re funny), learning a language through an app like Duolingo or Rosetta Stone (if you have time), starting a podcast about something that interests you (and then sharing it with friends!), writing poetry or short stories (again if funny), painting/drawing/sketching whatever comes into mind…the list goes on!

Stay positive, and keep your sense of humour!

Because laughter is the best medicine! (And laughter slows down ageing.) When it comes to stress relief, laughter is the best medicine. Laughing releases endorphins, which are chemicals in the brain that make you feel good and also help your immune system. Laughter also lowers blood pressure, improves circulation and helps you sleep better (it helps with stress-related insomnia).

Laughter can even help you lose weight! A study published in the journal Obesity found that obese women who watched a humorous video lost more weight after two months than those who didn't watch it (without any other changes). So if you're looking for an excuse to watch funny clips online or on Netflix and chill with your honey (or just friends), do so! The benefits will pay off big time in more ways than one.

Embracing menopause can be a liberating experience!

Menopause is a natural part of ageing, and it can be a time of great personal growth. It can also be a time of great creativity and self-awareness.

Here are some more ways to embrace menopause:

  • Let go of the need to control everything around you. Try letting go for small periods at first, then longer ones as you get used to it. You may be surprised by how much better you feel once you stop trying so hard to always be in control!
  • Don't worry about what other people think—you'll never know what they're thinking anyway! Focus on your own life instead, where plenty is going on already!

Conclusion: Live your life to the fullest!

The views expressed in this article are those of the author. All articles published on Counselling Directory are reviewed by our editorial team.

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Epsom, Surrey, KT17
Written by Karina Godwin
Epsom, Surrey, KT17

I am an Integrative Psychotherapist.

Being an integrative psychotherapist means I will tailor our sessions to your needs and draw from a range of approaches to work creatively with you and act as a catalyst for new perspectives to emerge.

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