Ruth McIlroy BACP Accredited Counsellor/Supervisor

About me

I've been a counsellor since 2005, working in the NHS and privately, with people who are coming to counselling for a wide range of reasons.

Some of the issues I've worked with over the years are: abuse (emotional abuse and sexual abuse); anger management; low self-esteem; low self-confidence; anxiety; generalised anxiety disorder; work-related issues such as bullying, stress, redundancy and problems with colleagues; PTSD (Post traumatic Stress Disorder), and general trauma.

In addition to general counselling, I have been working since 2005 offering therapy both to the general public and for those in the helping professions, NHS or caring professions, for example NHS staff, teachers, social workers, psychotherapists and counsellors. I offer counselling supervision and have been a clinical supervisor for several years. I worked with health service professionals in workplace counselling and and staff counselling for 10 years. I can offer EMDR as an EMDR Europe qualified practitioner.

Anxiety and loss of confidence in yourself

Over the years, I have seen many people who have become so generally anxious that they find it hard to go to work, or even to socialise or do everyday things they used to enjoy. Most find that exploring the roots of their anxious thoughts in a safe setting, coming to terms with old sources of anxiety, and learning ways to calm themselves, helps them to go out in the world again with more confidence.

Losing confidence in yourself can affect every aspect of your life, as you find your self-esteem plummeting and you get into that downward spiral of self-criticism and self-blame. I help people explore why they are feeling so unsure about themselves, explore ways to change this, and start shifting towards begin to know and hopefully like themselves better. With this, confidence and self esteem recover.

Feeling stressed at work

Work stress is a common experience nowadays, and in my time as a staff counsellor since 2005 I built up skills around helping people to deal with bullying, redundancy, unreasonable workloads, being unable to switch off, feeling unconfident in their role, having problems or conflict with colleagues, or being unable to say no, among many other issues. I've seen counselling make a real difference to people's day to day work lives, even where they don't feel they have much control over the work conditions causing their stress.

Difficulties with family members

If you're caught up in ongoing troubles at home, with partners or children or other relatives, you may feel overwhelmed by the situation and helpless to make things better. Coming along to counselling to talk through what's going on, in a calm and confidential space, can help you regain your perspective so that you can go back and have more confidence in taking positive actions to help yourself and family.

Abuse issues

Being sexually abused when you were young can have effects which stretch long into adult life, well after the point where you feel you should have 'got over it'. I believe that sensitive, caring, confidential counselling will help you begin to make sense of your feelings about what happened to you, and to understand the often overwhelming emotions it arouses. It can be healing even to say what happened (maybe for the first time) to someone who is here to support you wholeheartedly, genuinely cares about what you have suffered, and will not judge you in any way. The effects of emotional and physical abuse and childhood neglect can also be extreme - I am skilled in working with people who have suffered in these ways.

Trauma

I have worked over the years with people struggling with the after-effects of trauma. Revisiting the bad memories, in a safe and gentle way, where you remain in control al the time, is a very effective way to reduce symptoms such as nightmares, flashbacks, fear of going out, or constant fear that another bad thing is going to happen. I specialise in counselling to help people to recover from the effects of trauma, and am qualified in EMDR, which is an NHS-recommended treatment.for trauma.