What situations cause you to get into a "pre-conflict" mode?

Sanford Mabel (1994) developed from research a list of identifiable triggers for anger and aggression, I think that most of them land me in the pre-conflict mode and push my red buttons.

  • Interruption of goal-directed behaviour when time is important
  • Experiencing personal degradation or unfair treatment and being   powerless to stop it
  • Being treated unfairly, unkindly or in a prejudicial way, whether or not you are present
  • Being the object of dishonesty or broken promises, being disappointed by others or oneself
  • Having your authority, feelings or property disregarded by others
  • Being ignored or treated badly by a significant other
  • Experiencing harm because of your own negligence towards yourself
  • Being shown by others’ behaviour that they do not care
  • Being the object of verbal or physical assault
  • Being a ‘helpless victim’

Sanford Mabel PhD (1994) Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology.

The views expressed in this article are those of the author. All articles published on Counselling Directory are reviewed by our editorial team.

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Doncaster, South Yorkshire, DN11
Written by Steve Earlam, MSc Psychotherapy. Addictions Counsellor and Behaviourist
Doncaster, South Yorkshire, DN11

I am a Drug and Alcohol Recovery Specialist and a Behaviour Change Practitioner. I provide support for the management of anxiety, depression and PTSD conditions. My role is to work with you in adjusting your behaviour, your relationships and yourself. Your role is to learn, process, apply and practi...


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