What situations cause you to get into a "pre-conflict" mode?
Sanford Mabel (1994) developed from research a list of identifiable triggers for anger and aggression, I think that most of them land me in the pre-conflict mode and push my red buttons.
- Interruption of goal-directed behaviour when time is important
- Experiencing personal degradation or unfair treatment and being powerless to stop it
- Being treated unfairly, unkindly or in a prejudicial way, whether or not you are present
- Being the object of dishonesty or broken promises, being disappointed by others or oneself
- Having your authority, feelings or property disregarded by others
- Being ignored or treated badly by a significant other
- Experiencing harm because of your own negligence towards yourself
- Being shown by others’ behaviour that they do not care
- Being the object of verbal or physical assault
- Being a ‘helpless victim’
Sanford Mabel PhD (1994) Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology.
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