Struggling in silence

To struggle with something in your life can be painful, but to struggle by yourself and in silence can be one of the most lonely experiences for any human being.  I have been there myself.

You might have friends around you and even a loving partner, but often we cannot share the whole thing the whole of the time with these people.  Ultimately it is you who is going through the pain and you that is having to deal with it from minute to minute, no matter who you have or haven't got in your life.

Going through such a struggle can drain you of energy and enthusiasm as you work hard to hide it and keep everyone around you from suspecting anything.  We can spend years doing this before realising that this strategy hasn't actually helped or benefited anyone, least of all ourselves.  

We probably worry about other peoples' opinions about us if they knew the truth or what they would say.  The reality is, in the words of someone with great wisdom, 'Those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter.'  Putting this into perspective, you are just as important as the person next to you and your feelings deserve just as much respect.

Feelings can be very difficult things to cope with.  If our car is broken we get it fixed asap.  We do the same with most things, but not when it comes to our feelings.  If something isn't working we tend to battle on and hope it gets better.  Most of us will try to battle on in silence.

It can take months and quite often years of doing this before we decide that the time has come where we need to do something about it.  It has held us back long enough.  We have tried everything by ourselves but with no lasting success.  What now?

Well, some people will turn to God and others will turn to a counsellor.  Both are good places to be.  With God we have someone who will keep everything completely confidential, does not judge and has our best interests at heart.  So too with a counsellor.  Either way, talking to God or a counsellor finally allows you to share your burden.  You no longer have to walk alone.  

Talking, sharing, understanding and learning leads to healing and growth.  It is sad that so many years are lost to struggling in silence when, with a little time and focus, things could be dealt with by talking about it and life could be continued with better management of all the obstacles.  There will still be objects in our way, but we won't have to spend countless, lonely hours negotiating them alone.  

Speak out today and end your silent struggle.

Counselling Directory is not responsible for the articles published by members. The views expressed are those of the member who wrote the article.

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