Therapy - what you can expect

Today, I'd like to talk a little about what you can expect in the therapy space to help upskill you before entering the space. 

First off, the therapy space is not always a room with two chairs; it could just as easily be one of my favourites, an open field with animals, particularly horses, in it. But equally, it could be a computer screen.

Whichever therapy you choose (and five years ago, there were 450 different listed therapies). Walk and talk therapy was not a thing then, and now it is so, as you might imagine, therapies are being added to that list all the time. This means there are lots of options for you to find which therapy works for you personally, but essentially, the therapy space can take many forms.

Once you have decided on the therapy you want to engage with and perhaps the therapy space you will be in, you will likely go along for some sort of introduction or initial session. This is essentially the first session with your therapist and will likely be a get-to-know-you and your aims for therapy, whether or not this is your first time in therapy or you are returning to therapy, and what the overall arc of sessions might look like for your time in this space.

Do not worry if it doesn't have all of these things; each therapist works differently, and all approaches are slightly different. Essentially, there will be a starting session, and all others after will be getting into the work and doing the work sessions. Thereafter will be occasional check-in sessions, although not always as sometimes this is done in session and not always dedicated a whole session to it, so again, it depends on the approach, etc.

If you decide to stop therapy sessions, there will be an ending session so that you can close the work together in the most appropriate manner, so that you are not left in a place where it feels like you are hanging over a cliff and being dropped. This is why this session is necessary.

The contents of therapy sessions will vary greatly but are largely blueprinted by the approach to therapy and what you want to work on in therapy. After this, it's you doing the work with the therapist facilitating. 

Now, this is a massive over-simplification of what a therapist does, described in the word 'facilitating', of course, and I'm mindful of that, but the focus here is not on what the therapist is there for and me listing at least 450 different types of ways a therapist may do this. The focus of this article is what you can expect in therapy.

I'd like to make it clear here that you will have to do the work. It's not always something that is described as explicit as all that, but I feel it is important you know, as the client, that you will be working in session to achieve your aims in therapy.

Depending on what is going on for a client, they may or may not be aware or able to help themselves but what occasionally happens is a client may come with certain expectations and place those on the therapist and if the therapist does not perform in line with those expectations then it must be something the therapist is doing and not our expectations. This could absolutely be true, of course it could, but if we know from the outset and it's clear as glass that as the client we are the one doing the work. This can clear up any misconceptions or expectations before entering the therapist space. 

It is super important that the client knows a therapist does not have a magic wand and is not going to do the work for them. Why? You may be asking...

If you were thinking anything other than 'this makes sense,' then this might be important for you to know. Simply put, your autonomy as a client is everything, and there is something in the struggle or the work that is upskilling and empowering and means you'll be ready to do things for yourself outside the therapy space, too.

Imagine this: you see a butterfly trying to get out of its chrysalis, you stop to help it out of said chrysalis with all the good intentions in the world, only now it can't fly. For the simple reason that it builds its wings strength by pushing its way out of the chrysalis, so once it gets out, it has the strength to fly.

Therapy is a lot like this: if I do the work for you, if I help you out of the chrysalis like the butterfly, you won't fly; in a word, I'd have de-skilled you. In this space, it's our job to support you and bring awareness to you; you then get to decide what to do with that awareness, from an informed position. Something in the doing.

Then, when you're ready, you can go off after therapy, with the skills needed to handle your life, but it is your life and your autonomy is important.

Reach out to a professional for therapy to explore what you would like to in the therapy space of your choosing.