How to best support your child's return to school

Dear parents and carers,

As you anticipate the beginning of another academic year, with many overseas schools already back into the swing of things, are you feeling excited or feeling exhausted and still looking for those last-minute uniform items?

As a qualified psychotherapist with over 25 years of experience in education, both in the UK and overseas, I know only too well as a teacher and a parent the mix of emotions that rush through our veins at the start of the new academic year.

Whatever your situation is, you can be sure that the majority of young people are still enjoying their freedom from teachers, lessons and those dreaded rules and routines. There will, of course, be some children who thrive on routine and rules, and the school term can't come soon enough.

If you haven't already, this might be a good time to review how your back-to-school routine might look. Just giving some time and thought to planning things out can have a calming effect simply because you are taking action. Leaving things to the last minute will undoubtedly cause feelings of overwhelm, resulting in stress and even avoidance.

There are many ways of approaching the planning of the new academic year, and there will no doubt be some circumstances that will dictate how it has to be, but most will agree that the main aim is for everyone to have a positive, happy and successful year with as little drama as possible.

If this is all sounding too simple and straightforward, and you are perhaps preparing yourself for yet another year of being physically, emotionally and mentally drained, then let's begin by looking at some basic but essential emotional needs.

We are all aware of our physical needs, and our bodies will soon indicate to us that something is missing, for example, when we are hungry or thirsty. Few of us realise that our emotional needs are equally important but not so easy to identify or understand. Just as we see the effects of the wind on a blustery day, we can soon see the effects of emotional needs not being met, in our mood and change in behaviour.

It is vital that our young people feel they have control over some parts of their life; they need attention, and if not gained healthily, they will seek it in unhealthy ways. They need to be able to get privacy at times, and they need to know there is one person in their lives that they can turn to, no matter what and not be judged. The need for achievement and status is vital for a healthy young person, and as we are social beings, there will always be a need to be part of the wider community.

Our young people will soon be readjusting to early mornings, uniforms, quiet lines, sitting still and focusing for extended periods of time. Break times will be the time to run, shout, play and let go. The 3.15 pm hometime might be for some the best time of day, whilst for others, it might be the start of a club or after-school care. There will be a wide variety of situations and circumstances that parents and carers will be navigating to enable them to best care for their most treasured young person.

So, how do we ensure our young people are getting all their emotional needs met in a balanced way? Well, just as you ensure a balanced diet of protein, carbohydrates etc, consider giving attention to the individual's emotional needs and almost do a checklist to ensure nothing is getting missed.

Gosh, I'm feeling exhausted already! This is not to mention the hundred and one unexpected incidents or issues that crop up along the way. But, you can be sure that there is an entire workforce of teachers and support staff that are right now busy preparing for your young ones and ensuring that the classroom is inviting, resources are prepared, planning is in place, documents are collated, and name tags are ready.

Schools will be inviting parents and carers into schools for introductory meetings and highlighting the importance of communication. The teacher, parent, child communication triangle is the key to any successful year. Working positively together achieves the very best outcome for the students, and remembering that teachers work hard and want the best for every student they teach.

Let's start the year as we mean to go on by taking time to listen to our young people, communicating early, and not leaving things to the last minute and remember a triangle is as strong as the people in it.