Why teens struggle with sleep (and how parents can help)

Sleep matters. It shapes mood, concentration, energy levels, and the atmosphere at home. If your teen or nearly teenage child seems to be struggling with sleep, going to bed later and having difficulty waking up in the morning, it can be challenging. It can be difficult to watch your teen delay bedtime or stay up late, gaming, chatting with friends, or endlessly scrolling through social media. But sleep issues are common at this age.

So, what causes these sleep struggles, and how can you, as a parent or caregiver, support your teen or tween to get the quality and quantity of sleep they need to start their day?

Causes of sleep issues for teens

Here are some of the most common reasons teens struggle with sleep.

Biological changes

As they move through puberty and their teenage years, your teen's body clock naturally shifts to a later schedule. The release of melatonin (the hormone that helps us regulate sleep) is delayed in adolescence, meaning that they just aren't sleepy until much later at night.

Academic and social pressures

The increasing demands of secondary school, including homework, exams, and extracurricular activities, extend teenagers' days beyond their regular school hours. On top of this is the ever-present FOMO (fear of missing out), and pressure to stay connected with their social life can lead to late-night messaging with friends, keeping them awake.

Impact of screen time

This won't be news to you, but a constant onslaught of social media and gaming can overstimulate the brain. Plus, the blue light from phones and devices can further delay the production of melatonin.

Overthinking and anxiety

Bedtime can often become a time for worrying, as kids think about friendships, school performance, family relationships, and anxieties about what their future (tomorrow, next week, or well into the future) may hold. 

Inconsistent routines

Irregular sleep and wake times, especially on weekends, disrupt teens' sleep patterns and make it harder to establish a consistent sleep schedule.

How parents can help

Model good sleep habits

Your teen notices how you manage (or don't manage!) you're own rest. These tips can also benefit your sleep habits!

Talk about sleep (without nagging)

Nagging doesn't work! Get curious instead and talk with your teenager to understand their perspective. You can then help them notice how sleep affects their mood and energy.

Work towards small, realistic changes

Making gradual changes makes all the difference. Expecting your teen to shift from staying up until the early hours to a 10 pm bedtime is unrealistic and sets them (and you) up for failure. You could try suggesting small, gradual adjustments - even getting to bed just 15 minutes earlier can help. 

Encourage a wind-down routine

Incorporate 30 to 60 minutes of screen-free time before bed. Young people are increasingly aware of the impact of screen time, and although they might claim they'd prefer unfettered all-hour access, they also realise that this is not beneficial to their well-being. Help your teen discover alternative calming activities, such as reading or listening to soothing music. 

Help them manage stress and worries

The time for problem-solving is during the day, not at bedtime. Journaling or talking through your child's concerns can help them offload worries that may impact their sleep. 

Support consistent wake-up times

While adolescents might be inclined to sleep in on the weekend, waking up at more or less the same time every day makes all the difference in getting to sleep at night. Don't make this into a battleground - teens often rise to a challenge, and it can become a power struggle. Offer gentle encouragement instead by opening their bedroom door and letting the natural sounds of the household rouse them. 

Your teen's sleep struggles aren't just a sign of laziness or defiance – they're a normal part of growing up. 

If you're concerned that your teen is experiencing persistent insomnia or extreme fatigue that's affecting their well-being, mood, or school attendance, it's a good idea to seek extra support. Counselling can help you explore what's going on and find practical ways forward together.