Overcoming arguments in your relationship this Christmas

Is arguing with your partner going to impact on your Christmas this year? Are you sure? Does arguing play a big part in your relationship? When was the last time you went a full week without arguing with your partner? 

Constant arguing is commonplace in many relationships, especially at Christmas time. The Daily Mail stated in (2011) that a "poll of 3,000 Brits reveals more arguments happen during the festive month than at any other time of the year". Moreover, according to The Daily Mail (2011) the average couple has 312 arguments each year. However is arguing so bad? No arguing can play an important part in all relationships if you can find ways to resolve the conflict that leads to the argument instead of letting it escalate into bigger relationship problems. 

What can be done? A simple but effective activity can help to resolve arguments this Christmas! "Open talk", this activity is both an excellent activity in helping to develop communication and for resolving arguments. The objective of open talk is each person has an opportunity to ask for "open talk" when they have a problem with something that their partner is doing for example arriving home late and leaving their partner to look after their children on their own!

For open talk to be effective one person needs to voice their problem and the other person needs to listen without arguing back, then the other person gets their chance to respond without being too defensive or argumentative. Following this they look for ways to resolve the problem by looking for solutions together.

It is a good idea to allow a time limit for "open talk" 5-20 minutes. Please remember that each person in the relationship can ask for open talk at any time but is important that this happens at a time when either person is not to angry.

Have a go, try "open talk" this Christmas and see if it helps you to find ways to resolve your arguments this Christmas!

Merry Christmas and happy New Year 

Stephen Boylan 

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The views expressed in this article are those of the author. All articles published on Counselling Directory are reviewed by our editorial team.

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