Working with men, intimacy and shame
In this workshop, we will be exploring intimacy, shame and masculinity and seeking to understand how this unique, unusual and intimate space affects men.
Talking about feelings can be awkward, exposing and risky, leading to vulnerability and psychological intimacy. Therapy can be successful due to the meeting of ‘intimate strangers’. Often this psychological intimacy can generate closeness, sexual fantasy and vulnerability in the male client and the male or female therapist.
The male code and social conditioning of masculinity including the ‘real man’ discourse is the vehicle that shames many men and ultimately generates the ‘trauma' of emotional restriction. In turn, this sense of shame and the ‘man rules’ constricts men’s expression of intimacy. Men are then often just left with sex as their only way of showing intimacy.
The day will include exploring the following:
- What does intimacy mean to men, how do they show it and how do we help them develop it?
- Developing a greater understanding about shame and it’s link to intimacy.
- Exploring the ‘the male code’ and it's impact on emotional restriction, intimacy and shame.
- Effective ways of working with men and shame.
- Discussing how the therapist manages intimacy and shame in the room.
Feedback from previous workshops:
- "Greedy for more!"
- "Brilliant – your enthusiasm for the subject is infectious."
- "I came with high expectations – they were exceeded!"
- "The whole thing was fab – I learnt so much - thank you!"
About the host
James specialises in working with men and boys with 95% of his clients being male. He is passionate about developing ways of working with men in a more effective way including increasing emotional fitness and seeking to understand the core of the male condition.
James has been part of a men's group for the past 13 years.