About me
Attachment & Relationship Pattern Counselling (Individuals + Couples)
I offer counselling for individuals and couples who feel stuck in repeating relationship patterns, especially around anxious attachment, avoidant attachment, fear of abandonment, people-pleasing, conflict, shutdown, defensiveness, low self-worth, and loss of trust. Disordered attachment and trauma.
You might be in a relationship that feels confusing or emotionally exhausting, and find yourself thinking:
“What’s wrong with me?”
“Why do I overthink everything?”
“Why can’t I relax in love?”
“Why do we keep having the same argument?”
A lot of people come to me because they want to break old habits like self-sabotage, overgiving, shutting down, or feeling stuck in anxious–avoidant dynamics, and they want support that actually helps them understand why it keeps happening.
You might relate to this if you…
get attached quickly, then feel anxious or insecure
overthink texts, tone, or small changes in your relationship
struggle to trust, even when you want to
feel overwhelmed, exhausted, or constantly on edge
find yourself people-pleasing to keep the peace
feel unseen, responsible, or afraid of letting others down
shut down in conflict, or get defensive very quickly
feel stuck in an anxious–avoidant push–pull dynamic
keep repeating the same relationship pattern even when you try not to
find it hard to detach from an emotionally inconsistent relationship
Couples counselling: conflict, communication, shutdown and defensiveness
Many couples come to counselling because they’re going through a challenging period in their relationship and need a calm, neutral space to work through things together.
This often includes:
communication breaking down during conflict
repeated arguments that go in circles
one partner pushing for closeness while the other shuts down
defensiveness, criticism, blame, or withdrawal
feeling disconnected, tense, or emotionally distant
In couples work, I help you understand the pattern you’re stuck in — so it’s not just about “who’s right”, but what’s actually happening underneath the argument and how to change it.
Support when life is impacted by an ex-partner / high-conflict co-parenting
I also work with couples who are under strain due to ongoing stress involving an ex-partner — especially where behaviour feels controlling, manipulative, or difficult to manage.
This can have a serious emotional impact day-to-day and leave you feeling constantly overwhelmed, reactive, or exhausted as a couple.
Counselling can help you strengthen boundaries, stay emotionally steady, and protect your relationship while you navigate the situation.
How I work
My approach is relational, supportive, and collaborative.
Rather than just talking about events, we’ll look at what happens in real time, how conflict starts, what triggers panic or shutdown, why reassurance never feels like enough, and what you need to feel more secure in yourself and in relationships.
The work I offer is informed by attachment theory, relationship patterns, and Emotionally Focused (EFT-informed) ways of working, supporting you to build stronger emotional connection and repair.
In counselling, we may work on…
breaking anxious attachment and reassurance-seeking cycles
reducing relationship anxiety and overthinking
learning to stay present in conflict instead of shutting down
lowering defensiveness and improving communication
building self-trust, confidence, and boundaries
healing attachment wounds and raising expectations in relationships
understanding why certain people feel hard to let go of
recovering after emotional distress, loss of trust, or burnout in relationships
You don’t need to be “ready”
You don’t need to arrive with the right words or neatly labelled emotions.
If you feel overwhelmed, guarded, tearful, shut down, or unsure where to start, that’s okay. We start there.
Sessions
I offer counselling:
in Portsmouth (in-person)
online across the UK
for individuals and couples
If you’d like to explore working together, you can message me here or email to arrange an initial session.
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Training, qualifications & experience
I am a qualified Humanistic Counsellor and a registered member of the BACP, ICEEFT (International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy), and BEFT (British Emotionally Focused Therapy). My training allows me to support both couples and individuals with a clear understanding of attachment, emotional patterns and the impact of past experiences on present relationships.
Couples & Relationship Training
Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (EFCT) Externship
Specialist training in supporting couples to understand and repair emotional and relational patterns.
Emotionally Focused Individual Therapy (EFIT) – Level 2
Helps deepen work with each partner and understand how individual histories shape the couple dynamic.
Trauma, Attachment & Nervous System Training
Foundation Certificate in Polyvagal Theory – Rhythm of Regulation (Deb Dana)
Informs my work with nervous system responses, emotional safety and co-regulation.
Additional specialist training in:
• Trauma-informed practice
• Domestic abuse
• Addiction-informed work
• Complex trauma and attachment wounds
Core Professional Training
Diploma in Humanistic Counselling (BACP-registered pathway)
Professional Experience
Alongside my private practice, I have extensive experience in:
An addiction recovery centre
A domestic abuse charity
Supporting adults and couples affected by trauma, emotional disconnection, relational patterns and nervous system dysregulation
This background enables me to work safely, compassionately and effectively with both couples and individuals, particularly when past trauma, stress or relational ruptures shape current patterns.
Member organisations
BACP is one of the UK’s leading professional bodies for counselling and psychotherapy with around 60,000 members. The Association has several different categories of membership, including Student Member, Individual Member, Registered Member MBACP, Registered Accredited Member MBACP (Accred) and Senior Registered Accredited Member MBACP (Snr Acccred). Registered and accredited members are listed on the BACP Register, which shows that they have demonstrated BACP’s recommended standards for training, proficiency and ethical practice. The BACP Register was the first register of psychological therapists to be accredited by the Professional Standards Authority (PSA). Accredited and senior accredited membership are voluntary categories for members who choose to undertake a rigorous application and assessment process to demonstrate additional standards around practice, training and supervision. Individual members will have completed an appropriate counselling or psychotherapy course and started to practise, but they won’t appear on the BACP Register until they've demonstrated that they meet the standards for registration. Student members are still in the process of completing their training. All members are bound by the BACP Ethical Framework and a Professional Conduct Procedure.
Accredited register membership
The Accredited Register Scheme was set up in 2013 by the Department of Health (DoH) as a way to recognise organisations that hold voluntary registers which meet certain standards. These standards are set by the Professional Standards Authority (PSA).
This therapist has indicated that they belong to an Accredited Register.
Areas of counselling I deal with
Therapies offered
Photos & videos
Fees
£65.00 - £120.00
Additional information
Fees & Availability
Couples
£120 for the initial 75-minute assessment session (£150 evening)
£90 per 60-minute ongoing session (daytime)
£110 per 60-minute ongoing session (evening)
Individual mapping sessions are included as part of the process where needed (£60 per person).
Individuals
£65 per 50-minute session (daytime)
£80 per 50-minute session (evening)
Slight reductions are available on block bookings for daytime sessions.
Availability
I work Tuesday to Friday, offering both in-person sessions in Portsmouth and online sessions UK-wide via Zoom. Occasional evening sessions are available.
My counselling room is on the ground floor, fully accessible, and easily reached by car or public transport, with parking nearby.
Concessionary Spaces
At present, all concessionary slots are full, but a waiting list is available.
Please get in touch if you’d like to be added.
When I work
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Most of my clients like to book sessions at a regular time each week so that they can manage this around their usual routine. Slots get booked quickly.
Further information
Premises & Location
I offer counselling in person from quiet, private therapy rooms in Southsea, Portsmouth (PO1 area). The space is calm, comfortable, and confidential, designed to support emotional and nervous system safety throughout our work together.
The location is easily accessed from across Portsmouth, Southsea, Gosport, Fareham, Waterlooville and Havant, with nearby parking and good public transport links.
I also offer online sessions via Zoom for clients anywhere in the UK, or for those who prefer the comfort and flexibility of working from home.
My Way of Working
My approach is steady, compassionate, and trauma-informed. You won’t be rushed, pressured to retell everything at once, or pushed beyond what feels manageable.
Instead, we work gently and collaboratively, paying close attention to:
emotional safety
nervous system regulation
pacing and capacity
what your survival responses are protecting
Together, we explore the patterns that keep you stuck, understand what sits beneath them, and develop safer, more connected ways of relating, both with yourself and (where relevant) within your relationships.
Clients often describe sessions as grounding, validating and attuned, a space to slow down, make sense of reactions, and build confidence in your internal world.
