Dr Alexander Fox

Counselling for what troubles you—and what matters to you.

I bring over 12 years’ counselling experience—including 2 years on London's Harley Street—supervise other therapists, and draw on a background in literature and philosophy.

You may know what is troubling you, or simply feel that something is not right. We can begin there—making sense of what you are experiencing and exploring what could help.

You can begin with a full one-hour counselling session (£70), or choose a free 30-minute introductory meeting to meet me, ask questions and explore whether working together feels right. There is no obligation to continue after either option.

A Few Words From Clients

“I felt very at ease, was not scared to open up, he was approachable.”

"Alex is an exceptionally insightful counsellor... Without his guidance, I would not have been able to make important life decisions as sensitively nor as effectively for my own sake and for the well being of my family."

"I found that Alex takes the time to get to know you so that he has a deeper understanding of you as a person, which, I think, helps him to discover what will be the best and most effective way to help you."

"From the first session, Alex was both inviting and insightful. His incredible knowledge of subjects ranging from literature to philosophy and media made me feel not only at ease , but also helped me to look further inside myself and to connect the dots between life events and current mindsets."

Selected excerpts from four different client testimonials. Fuller testimonials below. 

Summary: Practical Support and deeper understanding

Perhaps you are someone who has been used to thinking through things and coping on your own. Maybe you even have a sense of what is wrong, but you still feel troubled or disconnected from your life.

You may be managing work or study, trying to keep up with how you think other people are doing, but you might privately be feeling anxious, depressed, self-critical or unsure of yourself. Perhaps understanding your difficulties has not yet made them easier to live with.

As I reassure all of my clients at the beginning, you don't need to have a clear sense of what is wrong to start counselling. Making sense of things takes time and we can begin with where you are, even if it is a feeling that something is not quite right. 

People who have worked with me have described me as warm, approachable, insightful and easy to talk to (please see client testimonials below). Our sessions together go at your pace, as we untangle together what you really think and feel.

I won't expect you to offer a polished account of what has been troubling you, as part of what the counselling might involve is discovering what you really want to say and then what you might want to do going forward in your life. In my opinion, good counselling is as much about helping you find you as it is about resolving specific problems.

I offer in-person counselling in St Andrews and Dundee, and online across the UK via Zoom. Sessions last a full hour and cost £70. A free 30-minute introductory conversation is available before you decide whether to book. 

Some things we might explore

The following are some of the issues that most of us face that we might explore together. Please don't feel, though, these have to be your problems to still reach out. 

• You may have great expectations for yourself, yet still feel that what you do is not good enough. You might find yourself achieving and then feeling the pressure to do so all over again. Or you might procrastinate because whatever you do feels so 'imperfect' and you can't allow yourself to produce that.
•  You might compare yourself to those around you and come to believe that they have a secret to happiness or success that you haven't found. Or it may be that you feel that the people around you don't truly know you and that working hard to be confident around them still prevents you from being seen as you really are.
• You may feel trapped between what you want and what other people's expectations are of you. Decisions about career, study, relationships or the future can seem so difficult when you struggle to separate what you may want from what you believe other people want from you. Understandably, you can be frightened of getting these decisions wrong when the issues are so consequential.
• These are examples of issues that we can make room for in counselling. You don't need to wait until you are unable to cope or until you have a clearly defined 'problem'.  You can reach out to explore it when you are ready.

Some groups that I often work with

I work with clients from all backgrounds, who have had a wide variety of different experiences. Below are a few of the groups that I often work with. 

Undergraduate/Postgraduate Students and university life

My experience of studying, researching, tutoring and counselling many students has given me invaluable insight into the opportunities and challenges of university life. We can explore perfectionism, loneliness, feeling that you don't belong, family expectations, relationship problems or the problem of what comes next.

Maybe you feel that you should be enjoying the student experience more than you actually are, or you are comparing yourself to your peers, or worry about whether the stress you are feeling is a sign that you shouldn't be at university. You may indeed feel the pressure of having to choose a life direction before you know what you really want. 

For postgraduate students and researchers, we can also explore the personal side of your academic work: the pressure of deadlines, the challenges of staying motivated and getting writing done, how to respond to feedback, the tensions in supervisory relationships or the uncertainty about an academic future. 

Whether you are an undergraduate or a postgraduate, your issues don't have to be about what you are studying. There is more than enough space to look at issues that may have little to do with academic performance, such as identity, relationships and what you want for yourself.

Our work together may not be simply about helping you to perform better, but about helping you to feel less pressure and to be more yourself. 

Professionals, university staff and those in caring roles

Many of my clients are themselves in professional or caring roles, such as therapists, academics, medics, clergy, educators, leaders or creatives.  These roles can come with an expectation of competence that leaves little room to feel uncertain, overwhelmed or conflicted.

I offer a space where you don't need to be the expert. We can explore the tensions between your professional and personal identity, consider how to make time for your own needs, and work towards a more meaningful relationship with your role.

You may be established in your career, beginning a demanding profession, or questioning whether the direction you have followed still fits you. Your concerns do not become less important because you are usually the person others turn to.

LGBTQ+

Here there's no need to explain or defend who you are. Many people who come to see me carry the weight of feeling unseen, judged, or unsure of their place in the world but our work isn't confined to difficulty. We can give equal attention to the creativity, resilience and simple joy of living as your authentic self.

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My work extends well beyond university and professional life. You may be working through a relationship issue, a bereavement, adjusting to retirement or to a future that was different to the one you expected. You do not have to have a connection to university life-or an interest in academic subjects-to be welcome here.

How we can work together

Sometimes you may need practical help to get through a difficult week. At other times, you may need help to look at underlying patterns and themes in your life that keep on returning. We can examine both, so that you can cope better in the present, while also facilitating more lasting changes. 

I am interested in not only your presenting problems, but what they might mean within the context of your particular life. Alongside careful listening, I will offer questions, observations and alternative perspectives. We can look at the repeating patterns in your life, consider whether an explanation really fits your experience, and find practical ways to respond differently. You are welcome to tell me when an idea misses the mark: we are working towards an understanding that makes sense to you.

My background especially helps me to offer this combination of practical support with more personal, deeper exploration.

My approach is broadly integrative/pluralistic, which means that I am familiar with a variety of therapy modalities (CBT, ACT, Psychodynamic, Gestalt, Solutions Focused, etc.) and can adapt them to the particular client facing me. In practice, what this means is that we can work together to find approaches that suit you as an individual, rather than working in just one way.

I have an academic background in English literature (please see below). This helps me to listen to the life story that has come to shape your understanding of who you are and what you believe is possible. Your life story shapes what you think your experiences mean, what you believe the future holds for you and what you believe is out of reach. Together, we can work to find out whether these stories do justice to the person you are now.

In addition, I also have an academic background in philosophy. This allows me to gently explore the assumptions and beliefs that are shaping your life. These beliefs and assumptions determine what counts as success for you, what you think you owe other people, how good a person you think you are and whether you believe happiness is possible for you. 

For example, when you feel you are 'falling behind' other people, we might work on the immediate anxiety and esteem issue and then look at what 'falling behind' has come to mean to you, whether it is connected to other people's expectations and whether the life you are 'falling behind' in is actually the life you want.

You don't need to have an interest in literature or philosophy to work with me. Books and ideas do shape my work, but my primary concern is with your experience and how you feel.

About me

I am Dr Alexander Fox and I bring more than 12 years' counselling experience to my work with clients, including several years working in Harley Street and I have supervised many trainee and qualified counsellors since 2019. This breadth of experience helps me address difficulties that are not straightforward. 

I have a PhD in English literature, which explored Harold Pinter's plays from a psychoanalytic perspective. I am also currently completing a PhD in philosophy, which explores regret over major life decisions. This background has helped me be especially attentive to how we understand our experiences, cope with uncertainty and deal with a life that has gone differently to what we expected. 

My aim is to help you understand yourself more deeply and to find more room to be yourself. This involves discovering what matters to you, questioning limiting beliefs and assumptions and uncovering possibilities that were maybe difficult to see.

Why clients choose to work with me

* BACP (British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy) registered counsellor with 12+ Years of Experience, which includes several years on London's Harley Street.
* An experienced supervisor for 7+ years to both trainee and qualified counsellors.
*A genuinely pluralistic practice where I fit the therapy to your problem rather than the other way around.
* An LGBTQ+ affirming practice.

I co-host The Reading Cure podcast, exploring how literature can support mental wellbeing, combining my passion for books with therapeutic insights.

I am co-author with colleague Dr Peter MacMillan on a series of books about Grit (i.e. how to persevere to reach your goals). In counselling, I am equally interested in helping you recognise when perseverance serves you and when an expectation or goal has become unnecessarily punishing.

Some Client and Professional Testimonials

Alex is an exceptional counsellor. I was immediately put at ease when I first met with him and, during our subsequent discussions, he was patient, friendly, flexible and insightful. I think Alex’s vast knowledge of counselling theory makes him stand out as a practitioner; the discussion of this was incredibly helpful for me in establishing a perspective from which to view my personal emotional issues. The sessions with Alex had a significant and lasting impact on my life, and I would enthusiastically recommend him as a counsellor.

I have designed and delivered workshops for organizations seeking to support their team's mental wellbeing:

Dr Fox conducted a session for Lloyds Banking Group on how to deal with health anxiety in this current climate. The session was part of Mental Health Awareness Week and was conducted for over 800 of our colleagues. The coping strategies Alex outlined were extremely useful and the session as a whole was truly fantastic and thoroughly enjoyable. We were all extremely delighted with Alex's holistic approach and I would strongly recommend others to lean on Alex's expertise in this area.— Lloyds Banking Group

Getting started

I offer counselling online across the UK and in person in Dundee and St Andrews. If you are uncertain whether we would be a good fit, you are very welcome to arrange a free 30-minute conversation, which we can have by telephone or online over Zoom. There is no obligation to book a session afterwards.

You are welcome to send a brief message saying a little about what brings you here. You do not need to explain everything in an email. We can use the introductory conversation to discuss what you are looking for, answer questions about the sessions, and consider whether working together feels right.

You do not need to know your goals in advance. Part of our work can be discovering what you need and what you would like to change. 

A Closing Thought …

My aim is to help you understand yourself by helping you see what you are living through more clearly. When we put into words what we are confronting, and reflect upon it, we gain greater freedom to respond to it rather than be unconsciously shaped by it.

T. S. Eliot: “We had the experience but missed the meaning.” From The Dry Salvages.

You do not need to have found the meaning before we begin. We can start with the experience, however difficult it is to put into words.

The sections below explain more about how we might work together and some of the difficulties you can bring to counselling.

Section A: My Approach to Therapy: The Journey We'll Take Together

Therapy can sometimes seem mysterious if you haven't experienced it before. Let me demystify the process and share how I believe effective therapy works. Our work together typically encompasses three essential aspects:

Emotional support

~Who listens? First line from a Paula Fox novel.

You may be used to being the listener for other people, keeping your problems to yourself, or not telling the full story in case other people worry. Our sessions together offer a space where you can say what you really think and feel without having to worry about what someone else might think. 

Whether we meet in-person or online,  I offer a space where you are the focus without judgement or hidden agendas. 

I will be genuinely present and attentively listening so that you feel truly heard. I will recognise and honour your unique experiences, emotions, and perspectives. I will seek to validate your feelings, which opens pathways to deeper understanding.

There is room to be upset, unsure, frustrated or quiet. We do not have to turn every feeling immediately into something to solve.

Clarification

When challenges feel overwhelming, we often lose touch with what is really going on. Together, we can slow things down and make your experience more understandable. 

Exploring Your Life Story: I'll help you understand how past experiences may be influencing your present reality, using my literary background to help you recognize patterns and themes in your personal narrative

Uncovering Core Beliefs: Drawing on my philosophical training, we'll identify and examine the hidden beliefs that may be shaping your perceptions and responses

Applying Different Therapy Modalities and Techniques: My pluralistic approach allows us to view your challenges in a variety of ways, which gives us more flexibility in how to tackle them.

For example, when you struggle to begin something important, we can explore both what might help you start and why an imperfect attempt feels so difficult to allow yourself.

Transforming Insights into Meaningful Change

Understanding alone isn't enough—therapy should lead to positive change. We'll work together to:

Reframe Challenging Situations: We can consider other ways of understanding a difficulty without minimising what has happened or insisting that you find a positive side to it.

Develop Practical Strategies: We'll work out what your goals are and use techniques and strategies to help you achieve them

Build Resilience: We'll work out what your strengths are and how you can draw upon them to tackle and cope with your problems

Connect with Your Values: I will help you align your choices with what truly matters to you

Cultivate Self-Compassion: I will help you learn to treat yourself with the same kindness you would offer a good friend.

Change might mean responding differently to self-criticism, having a difficult conversation, making a decision, setting a boundary, or allowing yourself to rest without having to earn it first. We can consider together what meaningful progress would look like in your life.

Section B: Common problem areas

The previous section gave you an idea of what I consider the essential ‘ingredients’, so to speak, of effective therapy. In this section, I detail how I might tackle a variety of common problems.

a) Resolve your relationship difficulties

You may be struggling with conflict, a difficult breakup, uncertainty about how a significant other really feels, or a niggling sense that you keep on giving more than you receive. You might feel lonely, despite having friends, a partner or an active social life.

In our sessions, we can explore what you need but find difficult to say, how you respond when rejected, or when you are misunderstood or taken for granted. We can work together on developing your communication and on setting boundaries, as well as working on what relationships are worth developing and others that you might want to change. 

It must be stressed, though, that individual counselling examining a relationship issue should not be seen as a replacement for couples counselling.

b) Addictions/compulsions

You may find yourself repeatedly doing something you want to stop, despite its effects on your health, relationships or sense of control. We can explore these patterns without treating them as defining you.

Our work can include identifying triggers, developing alternative responses, and exploring what a behaviour offers you in the moment as well as what it costs over time. Where relevant, we can also examine difficult feelings or conflicts connected with it.

We will consider what support fits the particular problem, including whether specialist help is needed alongside or instead of our work together.

c) Overcoming anxiety

You may find it difficult to switch off and relax, as you are thinking about what could go wrong in the future or you are replaying what you have said and done in the past. 

As mentioned above, we can work on addressing the immediate distress as well as the longstanding patterns that are surrounding it. Using approaches such as CBT, we can examine anxious predictions as well as help you take manageable steps to participate in situations you have been avoiding. 

Where it is helpful, we can explore past experiences to see how they might be shaping what is happening now. 

The aim is not to make you perfectly calm or certain before you can live your life, but to help you find more freedom in how you respond.

d) Depression

You may feel persistently low, depleted, disconnected and unable to find pleasure in what you used to. We can begin by exploring how it is influencing your daily life, without trying to make you see things from a positive angle. 

Depending on what suits you, we can examine your core limiting beliefs, we can find ways for you to reengage with life and we can look at feelings that have maybe been difficult to acknowledge. 

We can work towards changes at a pace that takes your energy and circumstances seriously.

e) Achieve greater self-acceptance

One of the major tasks of therapy is to help clients see that they have a right to be who they are and that any weaknesses they possess need not be grounds for fundamentally rejecting who they are.

I draw on approaches including compassion-focused therapy and rational emotive behavioural therapy to help you develop a less punitive relationship with yourself. We can explore self-talk, shame, comparison and the conditions you may have placed on being acceptable to yourself.

You can take responsibility for a mistake without making it a verdict on your whole person. Equally, you do not have to become exceptional before you are entitled to care, rest or support.

f) Ambition, achievement and self-worth

In my work with clients in law, finance, the arts and other demanding fields, I am interested both in what helps people pursue their goals and in what happens when achievement becomes the condition of feeling good enough.

You may value doing well yet find that each success quickly becomes something you must repeat or exceed. Perhaps you struggle to enjoy what you have achieved, feel threatened by other people’s progress, or worry that easing the pressure would mean losing your ambition.

We can explore how to keep what you love about your work or study without making performance a constant judgment on your worth. This can include recognising your strengths, questioning punishing standards, and distinguishing goals that matter to you from those you feel obliged to pursue.

The aim is not necessarily to become less ambitious, but to find a less punishing and more satisfying way to live with your ambitions.

g)Loss, grief and a different future

Life is, in one sense, a series of losses. Many are small (if not always trivial) and some are most significant: whether it be the loss of a partner, a child, our youth, or the heyday of our successes, we must learn to cope with the passing of time and the absence of what is still so precious to us.

There can also be grief for a relationship that never became what you hoped, a missed opportunity, or a future you had expected to have. You do not have to justify why a loss matters to you, or find a lesson in it before you are ready.

We can work towards an understanding of your grief that respects what you have lost, while exploring what support you need now. Over time, there may be the possibility to imagine a future without feeling that doing so betrays the past.

 h) Loss of meaning and suicidal thoughts

I was standing in the snow by my car, looking up at the sky, when I realized that meaning had fled my life~ Allen Wheelis from his novel, "The Seeker."

When life feels unbearable, it matters that you can speak openly about what you are experiencing and have it taken seriously. I will not assume that I already know what your thoughts mean for you. We can explore your pain, what helps you feel safer, and what additional support may be needed.

Our work may also involve exploring what has become difficult to hope for, what still matters to you, and how to approach guilt or regret without adding further punishment to your distress.

Your regrets can indeed be honoured and learnt from, without them becoming something to berate yourself over.

You can begin with a full one-hour counselling session (£70), or choose a free 30-minute introductory meeting to meet me, ask questions and explore whether working together feels right. There is no obligation to continue after either option.

Although personality typing can never capture our uniqueness, it can be one of the ways that we can come to understand ourselves. For those interested in Myers-Briggs and/or the enneagram, my type is INFJ and 4, respectively.

Please have a read of a few more client testimonials about their experience of working with me, where they emphasise the following:

• Reflective approach: I combine my philosophical and literary knowledge with my therapeutic expertise to provide insights that help clients achieve greater self-awareness and break free from limiting beliefs.
• Empathic: Clients feel safe to open up, and they feel understood. I provide warmth while offering professional guidance.
• Personalised approach: I see each client as an individual and tailor the therapy to suit them as a unique person.

Client Testimonials

"After a particularly rough time in my life, I came to Alex seeking help in better understanding the basis of my negative feelings about myself. From the first session, Alex was both inviting and insightful. His incredible knowledge of subjects ranging from literature to philosophy and media made me feel not only at ease – he was relatable and understood what I was saying to him – but also helped me to look further inside myself and to connect the dots between life events and current mindsets.

With his help, I feel I have come a long way these last few months; I have a better understanding of my own mental health, and with his advice and suggestions, I am now taking proactive steps to rectify some deep-rooted cognitive biases. Alex has listened to me and carefully considered which avenues would be beneficial to explore, based on his insight and professional opinion. He has helped me to come to terms with myself, and while I may not be 100% there, I am much closer to my goal than I was before our sessions.

For anyone searching for a warm, friendly, and empathetic therapist, I would highly recommend Alex. I have felt that all of our work together was purposeful and valuable, and I look forward to continuing to get to know both myself – and Alex – better in the future."

"Alex is an exceptionally insightful counsellor. His empathetic approach, combined with a highly rigorous intellectual foundation, helped me understand the personal issues I needed to address and the best ways for me to manage them. Without his guidance, I would not have been able to make important life decisions as sensitively nor as effectively for my own sake and for the well-being of my family. His personalised approach was key to gaining my confidence and enabling me to move forward on issues with which I had struggled for years."

"For years, I knew I had issues and finally plucked up the courage to find a counsellor. I had anxiety, feelings of guilt, and an inferiority complex. Family issues dominated my thoughts, and I felt a sense of guilt, shame, and blamed myself. Alex helped me look at these issues differently and, with his knowledge and experience, helped me break free from the past and stop feeling guilty, and I now know my own personality. I felt very at ease, was not scared to open up, he was approachable. I would definitely recommend him".

"Alex was able to work with me to identify many underlying issues that I have struggled with. I have found the process to be interesting and enjoyable. He provides a relaxed and comfortable environment in which I feel I can be open and talk frankly. Alex has helped me considerably in exploring my thoughts and introduced me to a number of techniques and exercises that I can use on a day-to-day basis to deal with anxiety as it arises."

"I’ve found Alex to be very attentive, approachable and knowledgeable. Alex has helped me work through issues in both my personal and professional life, helping me gain insights that I would not have been able to reach on my own. In addition, Alex has also equipped me with the tools that will help me deal with any future difficulties that I may encounter. I found that Alex also takes the time to get to know you so that he has a deeper understanding of you as a person, which, I think, helps him to discover what will be the best and most effective way to help you. Alex also a deep understanding of philosophy, and I’ve been impressed with how he’s managed to sometimes integrate this into my sessions, where appropriate, and make it relevant to my situation. Alex has helped me a great deal, and I’ve learnt a lot from him; I can’t recommend him highly enough.

"I've been having counselling with Alex for several months now. Initially, I wasn't sure how long I wanted to go; I had planned just to get me through my 'crisis' at the time. However, the more I went, the more relaxed I became and felt there was more I definitely wanted to work through. I find Alex very calming, honest..and most importantly for me..logical! I also didn't know how I would be with a male counsellor, but I can genuinely say I've worked through a lot of issues. My main concern is trust, or lack of, however, I already feel a difference in my thought pattern. Slowly but steadily, I'm noticing little changes in the way I'm thinking. I wouldn't hesitate to recommend Alex to anyone looking for counselling"

"Alex has helped me to create strategies to help with immediate anxiety problems as well as helping me to face long-standing issues. Alex has helped me to explore many strategies in a safe, secure environment and encouraged me to seek out others in my own time. He has also helped me to vocalise my thoughts, feelings, and ideas. Alex has a way of turning my thoughts back to me to help me make my own conclusions. Through these sessions, I am learning how to manage on my own and in the sessions in a safe way. I feel I am being supported and guided through the wilderness of my own mind to some clarity. I am not constricted by a maximum (or minimum) number of sessions and am able to be supported in what I want to achieve, in whatever timescale that I need as an individual".