Understanding anxiety in adults, children and teenagers

Anxiety is something many people experience at some point in their lives, yet it can feel incredibly isolating when you are living with it day-to-day. For some people, anxiety feels like constant overthinking and never being able to switch their minds off. For others, it may show up physically through panic attacks, nausea, a racing heart, poor sleep, or feeling permanently on edge.

For children and young people, anxiety often looks very different. It can appear as emotional outbursts, clinginess, school refusal, tummy aches, difficulty sleeping, low confidence, anger, perfectionism, or withdrawing from friends and family. Sometimes children do not have the words to explain how anxious they feel, so their behaviour becomes the communication instead.

As an integrative psychotherapist, children’s counsellor, and clinical hypnotherapist, I work with both adults and children experiencing anxiety in many different forms. One of the biggest things I have learned through my work is that anxiety rarely comes from nowhere. Often, it develops over time through stress, overwhelm, pressure, difficult experiences, or feeling emotionally unsafe or unsupported for long periods.

Many people struggling with anxiety become stuck in survival mode. They spend their time trying to 'keep going' to the point that they lose touch with how overwhelmed they actually feel. Therapy can offer a space to slow things down, understand what is happening beneath the surface, and begin finding healthier ways to cope.

What anxiety can look like

Anxiety affects everybody differently. Some people experience constant worry and overthinking, while others struggle more with physical symptoms or emotional overwhelm.

Anxiety in adults

Adults often describe anxiety as feeling unable to relax, overthinking conversations or situations, and struggling to sleep because their mind will not switch off. Many also experience constant pressure, leaving them emotionally exhausted and overwhelmed by everyday responsibilities.

For some, anxiety can lead to panic attacks, difficulty concentrating, irritability, or emotional shutdown. Others may find themselves worrying about failure, letting people down, or feeling unable to cope with the demands of daily life.

Anxiety in children and teenagers

Children and teenagers may experience anxiety in different ways. It can show up as school anxiety or school refusal, friendship difficulties, emotional meltdowns, or separation anxiety. Some young people struggle to regulate their emotions, while others experience perfectionism, low self-esteem, sleep difficulties, or panic symptoms.

Anxiety can also lead to withdrawal from social situations and a need for constant reassurance, making it difficult for young people to feel confident and secure in their daily lives.

What causes anxiety?

Sometimes anxiety is linked to a specific event or experience. Other times, people tell me they have “always been anxious” for as long as they can remember.

Anxiety is not weakness, attention seeking, or 'being dramatic'. It is often the nervous system responding to stress, fear, uncertainty, or emotional overload. There is rarely one single cause of anxiety. Usually, several things contribute to it over time.

Common causes in children

For children, anxiety can develop through:

• school pressures
• bullying or friendship issues
• family changes
• social pressures
• neurodiversity
• difficult experiences
• feeling emotionally overwhelmed
• pressure to achieve or fit in

Common causes in adults

For adults, anxiety may be connected to:

• work stress or burnout
• relationship difficulties
• parenting pressures
• trauma or difficult past experiences
• financial worries
• chronic stress
• low self-esteem
• feeling stuck or emotionally unsupported

Sometimes people become so used to functioning in a heightened state of stress that anxiety begins to feel normal. They may continue working, parenting, and coping externally while feeling exhausted internally.

This is often when people reach out for therapy, not because they are 'broken', but because their mind and body are signalling that something needs attention.

Supporting children and young people

Working with children and teenagers is something I feel particularly passionate about. Young people today face enormous pressures, socially, emotionally, and academically, and many struggle quietly without fully understanding what they are feeling.

Children often communicate differently with adults. They may struggle to sit and talk directly about emotions, especially if they feel embarrassed, confused, or overwhelmed. This is why sessions are adapted depending on the child’s age, personality, and needs.

Sessions may involve:

• creative activities
• games or visual tools
• emotional regulation exercises
• psychoeducation
• relaxation techniques
• confidence-building work
• talking therapy
• grounding strategies
• exploring friendships or school worries

For teenagers, therapy often becomes a space where they can speak openly without fear of judgement or pressure. Many young people tell me they feel they have to appear 'fine' at school or home, even when they are struggling inside. 

Therapy gives them permission to slow down and explore what is really going on beneath the surface.

I also understand how difficult it can be for parents watching their child struggle with anxiety. Parents often feel helpless, worried, or unsure how best to support their child. Where appropriate, a therapist will work collaboratively with parents, while also protecting the child’s sense of safety and confidentiality within sessions.

Supporting adults with anxiety

Adults experiencing anxiety often carry huge emotional loads. Many are balancing work pressures, parenting, relationships, financial worries, and responsibilities while neglecting their own emotional well-being.

A lot of adults I work with describe feeling emotionally drained for years before finally reaching out for support. Some are high-functioning externally while feeling exhausted and overwhelmed internally.

In therapy, we work together to better understand what is maintaining the anxiety and how to begin calming the nervous system.

This may involve:

• identifying triggers and patterns
• understanding thought processes
• exploring emotional overwhelm
• building healthier boundaries
• developing coping techniques
• learning grounding and relaxation strategies
• processing difficult experiences
• rebuilding confidence and self-worth

I believe therapy should feel supportive rather than clinical or cold. Sometimes people simply need a space where they do not have to hold everything together for everybody else.

The role of clinical hypnotherapy

Hypnotherapy can be particularly helpful for anxiety, panic, stress, sleep difficulties and confidence issues, especially when used alongside talking therapy.

Many people imagine hypnotherapy as losing control or being unconscious, but this is a common misconception. Clinical hypnotherapy involves entering a deeply relaxed state in which the mind and body can feel calmer and more regulated.

For people living with ongoing anxiety or hypervigilance, learning how to slow down both mentally and physically can feel empowering. Hypnotherapy may help people feel calmer, improve sleep, reduce panic symptoms and develop greater confidence and emotional resilience.

Some people find that combining hypnotherapy with talking therapy offers a more holistic approach, supporting both emotional insight and practical coping strategies.

Seeking support

Many people living with anxiety are feeling depleted, attempting to stay emotionally regulated. Therapy should feel like a safe space to gently explore things at a pace that feels manageable.

Living with anxiety can feel exhausting, frustrating, and lonely, but support is available.

Over time, therapy can help people:

• feel calmer and more emotionally balanced
• understand themselves better
• build confidence
• improve relationships
• feel more present in everyday life
• develop healthier coping strategies
• reduce emotional overwhelm
• and feel less controlled by anxiety

Progress is not always linear, and healing takes time, but many people find that anxiety becomes much more manageable when they feel properly supported and understood.

Whether you are an adult struggling with anxiety, a parent worried about your child, or a young person feeling overwhelmed, therapy can provide a safe and supportive space to begin making sense of things.