Growing your own way: self-care routines that work for you

We've all been there – scrolling through social media, reading self-care tips, and feeling like we're doing it all wrong. But here's the thing: there's no one-size-fits-all approach to self-care. 

Every day, we learn and experience something new, and that's what makes life so beautiful. Today, I learnt to challenge a negative experience and trust my own knowledge of self-care to settle intrusive thoughts. It wasn't about following someone else's rules; it was about listening to myself.

If you're seeking self-care that works for you, here are some tips to get started. Feel free to adapt them to your style, and don't just run with them, hop, skip, and dance with them if that's your way!

Mindfulness: slowing down and being present

Mindfulness isn't about sitting still and trying not to think. It's about giving yourself time to slow down, pause, and reflect. Take a walk without your phone and notice the world around you. Notice the sights, sounds, and smells. It's about being present in the moment, without judgment.

There is often a misconception that in order to be mindful, we have to sit still and empty our heads of thoughts. The reality is exactly the opposite when mindfulness is carried out in a way that feels natural for the person; they will often allow their thoughts to slowly enter into the mind instead. This helps them to work through them, bringing calm and clarity to a situation that can sometimes be filled with overwhelming feelings.

Journaling: your thoughts, your way

Journaling can be a powerful tool for self-reflection. Don't worry if your journal doesn't look like the ones online. It's not about being polished or decorative; it's about expressing yourself. Write randomly, sketch, or jot down words that resonate with you. Make it yours.

Don't avoid using it if you are writing about something you would rather forget. Don't be afraid to tear it out and rip it up as a symbolic act of throwing it away. If it’s something you want to keep, consider adding colour, making it bold or standing out in some way so that you are drawn to it.

Gratitude: noticing the small things

Practice gratitude. Notice the small things: a smile from a stranger, a small compliment from a colleague. If you miss them by writing them on a piece of paper in a notebook where you won't see them, then consider writing them on your phone so they are there when you open your messages, or stick a post-it note inside your wardrobe door, so you see them when you get dressed. Find a way to express gratitude where you will both notice and remember the important things to you.

Self-care: prioritising you

Self-care isn't selfish; it's essential. Make time for activities that nourish your mind, body, and soul. Schedule self-care and treat it as non-negotiable time. Ask yourself: what makes me smile? It might be hosting dinner parties, taking solitary walks, or reading a book. Find what gives you a buzz and prioritise it.

Trying new things: the beauty of uncertainty

It can be easy to fall into the trap of thinking “What if I hate it?” when we try new things, but the truth is, we find ourselves by trying new things. If you don't like something, that's OK! You don't have to keep doing it. The point is to explore, experiment, and find what works for you.

Celebrating progress: you're doing great

Growth is a journey, not a destination. Recognise your achievements, no matter how small they may seem. You're doing great, and every step forward is a success. Don't compare yourself to others; focus on your own progress.

Embracing imperfection: self-care without judgment

Self-care doesn't need to look polished or professional. It's about doing what works for you, without judgment. So, ditch the pressure and focus on what nourishes your mind, body, and soul. Let's thrive our own way, embracing self-care without the pressure of perfection.

Here's a little exercise: take a deep breath, and remind yourself that you're doing the best you can. And that's enough. As you go about your day, notice the small things that bring you joy. Maybe it's a good cup of coffee, a beautiful sunset, or a great conversation. Celebrate them!

Self-care is a journey, and it's yours alone. Don't compare it to anyone else's; focus on your own path. You got this. Now, go forth and thrive your way.