A therapeutic journey - what does this look like?

Society has come a long way with more open conversations around mental health and its importance. If we go back a few years, it was a subject not spoken about, and if someone was seen to be having challenges with their mental health or seeking support from a therapist, then they could be seen in a negative light. Now? People are encouraged to treat their mental health with importance. We even have public figures encouraging us all to prioritise our mental health. 

Part of looking after our mental health can, of course, be speaking to a therapist. Society has thankfully started to normalise seeking and using therapy. Our mental health is being seen as something which carries similar importance to our physical health. With more doors to therapy being opened, this is a great time to speak about what to expect on your therapeutic journey, as there are sometimes unrealistic expectations of therapy. 

The stages of the therapeutic journey 

Stage 1 - Finding a therapist

Using a directory like the Counselling Directory is a great place to start when looking for a therapist. I always recommend looking through profiles yourself, as there will be profiles you feel yourself being drawn to. You can make contact with them, whether you have experience of therapy or not, and ask any questions you like, as most therapists will offer a free consultation.

• What type of therapy do they offer?
• What can you expect when working with them?

They will not be offended and will be happy to answer these questions. It also enables them to ask some questions themselves about what you wish to gain from therapy. By the end of the conversation, you could both decide you are a good fit and happy to start this journey together. 

Stage 2 - Setting expectations

This stage is an important one. I have mentioned that mental health and therapy are now openly being spoken about and encouraged. With this, though, as well as companies promoting their therapy services, it can sometimes bring unrealistic expectations.

Therapeutic journeys can differ, but typically, this is not a quick fix. The chances are, you may not reach the goals you have set out for in six sessions; this is a journey. CBT, for example, is a commonly used approach, and it certainly has its place; however, for a lot of people, you may need to go deeper below the surface.

You will first want to establish a relationship with your therapist. After all, you have just met them and opening up straight away could be quite daunting. To help establish this, commitment is essential. Certainly, at the start of your journey, you may wish to consider weekly sessions to help build a foundation for you to work off of.  With a healthy relationship and comfort established, it enables you to share more. You are about to go on a journey, sharing things about your thoughts and emotions, for maybe the first time.

Stage 3 - Work commences

With the relationship established, it provides the foundations for deep work to commence. Sometimes people can enter therapy, fully conscious of deep-rooted challenges. However, this is not always the case. Maybe your goal is to overcome your challenges with anxiety or anger?

There may be an expectation that your anger is discussed and you learn to manage it within a few sessions. You feel you get angry for no reason, and you just need to manage it. However, there may be deeper reasons for this anger or anxiety, which you were unaware of before starting this journey. So, you work on this in therapy, you go deeper. Maybe you revisit experiences? Relationships? These are just two examples of what could be unconscious reasons behind these emotions. You can now see why your therapeutic journey may not just be a few sessions and a quick fix. 

Stage 4 - Reflection

You've now worked through challenges you may have expected, and challenges you may not have expected. It's been a journey of emotions and challenges, but now you can reflect and be proud of the work you and your therapist have done on this journey. 

Stage 5 - Deciding to end your journey

This stage can differ, and it's dependent on the individual. With the hard work being done, this stage can bring the ending to your therapeutic journey. You have done the work, learnt a lot about yourself. You now have tools you can use to help you, for example, managing your anger. You feel ready to walk alone.

For some, though, it may not bring an end to your journey. For some, the journey doesn't end, however, the frequency simply changes. You may feel you have been through the journey, and instead of attending your sessions on a weekly basis, you may want to have a monthly check-in. You can use the space to check in and talk about what has been happening. You attend the gym or exercise classes as part of your routine for your physical health, so you may wish to still have a space to speak about things to help look after your mental health. However, it is important to be able to recognise if you start to experience challenges where you need to pick up more frequent sessions, even if it's fortnightly. 

Something to make note of, though, from this, is that people's journeys can differ. I have explained a journey which may be typical. However, there are some journeys where it may require trying two different therapists. The first may not have been a good fit, so you restart with a different therapist. There is also no time limit on your journey. Some people are in therapy for three months or six months, some can be in regular therapy for 18 months to two years. There is no right or wrong, and it's what works for you. 

Every journey is unique.