Understanding and managing worry

Worry is a cognitive, thought-based event, defined in the dictionary as “the state of feeling anxious and unhappy about something, or thinking about the problems or unpleasant things that might happen” (Cambridge University Press, 2026). Worrying is extremely common, and many people lose hours of time to considering ‘what-ifs’ and ‘worst-case scenarios’ that rarely happen.

The unknown

On a personal level, I can really relate to worrying. People always described me as a worrier when I was a child. I remember having a catchphrase of “I’m worried about...” and going through the latest woes and fears from my worry in detail.

What I didn’t understand then was that worrying is actually a manifestation of fear of the unknown. When you worry, your brain is trying to make the unknown known, but this isn’t possible and can keep you trapped in your head ruminating “what-ifs”.

Considering possible scenarios and planning what you would do tricks you into thinking you’ll be prepared if the imagined worry actually happens. In reality, if the worry did transpire, there wouldn’t be any comfort in having pre-empted it, and it wouldn’t reduce the intensity of your feelings.

The truth is the future is unknown, and no amount of worrying will change this fact. As Randy Armstrong (n.d.) said, "Worrying does not take away tomorrow's troubles. It takes away today's peace."  With this in mind, try to focus on cultivating self-belief that you can problem-solve or deal with issues as they arise to protect your peace of mind. Often, worries stem from underestimating your ability to cope if the worst-case scenario happens. 

Worry and the body 

While worry may live in your head, your body is sadly not immune to its effects.

Your amygdala struggles to differentiate between perceived threats (worries) and what's actually happening. This alarm triggers your body’s automatic stress response (sympathetic nervous system), flooding it with cortisol and adrenaline as it prepares for the fight-or-flight response.

However, because the threat comes from your hypothetical worries, there’s nothing to run from or fight. So the stress hormones sit in your body with nowhere to go and can make you feel exhausted, jittery and/or anxious. 

If you experience this, try taking some deep breaths with a longer exhalation, as if you are blowing out a candle (counting can help, for example: in for a count of 4 and out for a count of 6). The combination of breathing, counting and visualising is a welcome distraction technique to break the cycle of worrying, and this practice activates your body’s parasympathetic nervous system or ‘rest mode’, signalling that all is well. 

Worry and anxiety often feed into each other, with worry forming in your head and showing up as anxiety in your body. It’s really common to then worry about how anxious you feel or the physical sensations you’re experiencing.

Worries rarely transpire 

Borkovec (1994) believed that those who struggle with anxiety use worrying to mentally prepare for catastrophe, and as most worries never transpire, the brain then credits the act of worrying with prevention.

This can dangerously contribute to a person developing the belief that worrying was the thing that kept them safe. This can trap people in cycles of worrying, when actually the event was unlikely to have happened anyway.

Collect evidence 

What the brain actually needs is proof that worries rarely transpire and even if they do, they often don’t turn out as badly as you predict they will.

So if you’d like to reduce your worrying, collecting evidence is a good place to start. LaFreniere and Newman (2020) created the worry outcome journal as a tool for their research on the deceit of worry. 

If you’d like to give this a try, create a journal with four columns on paper or a spreadsheet:

1. The prediction: Write down (in detail) the worry and give it a deadline. 
2. The worst-case scenario: Name the worst outcome you’re dreading. 
3. The reality (outcome): Write this after the deadline. What actually happened?
4. The lesson: Compare columns 1 and 3. Was your prediction right, wrong, or manageable? 

Keep adding to your worry outcome journal, so you create your own bank of evidence to refer to. It will take perseverance and time, but eventually you may recognise that your worries rarely transpire and even if they do, you managed to problem-solve them in the present when they happened. 

Three things to remember when you're worrying

As a psychotherapist, I support many people who struggle daily with worrying, but I’m not completely immune from relapsing into patterns of this unhelpful way of thinking, especially when stressed. As with anything, we may not be able to eliminate an unhelpful way of thinking completely, but with self-awareness, we are more likely to reframe or challenge it.

Here arethree reminders for when you next find yourself worrying: 

1. You cannot predict the future. Worrying is a misuse of your imagination.
2. You will find a way to cope with, or problem-solve, issues should they arise.
3. Worrying can't stop things from happening, and it’s impossible to pre-empt every possible scenario (and it's exhausting!). You deserve peace of mind.

I hope this article has been helpful. If you're struggling with worry and finding it difficult to manage anxious thoughts, talking to a therapist can help you explore your concerns and develop ways to cope.

References

Borkovec, T.D. (1994) ‘The nature, functions, and origins of worry’, in Davey, G.C.L. and Tallis, F. (eds.) Worrying: Perspectives on theory, assessment and treatment. Chichester: Wiley, pp. 5–33.

Goodreads (n.d.) Randy Armstrong Quote. Available at: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/612549-worrying-does-not-take-away-tomorrow-s-troubles-it-takes-away (Accessed: 3 November 2026).

LaFreniere, L.S. and Newman, M.G. (2020) ‘Exposing worry's deceit: percentage of untrue worries in generalized anxiety disorder treatment’, Behaviour Therapy, 51(3), pp. 413–423. doi: 10.1016/j.beth.2019.07.003.

Oxford University Press (2026) Oxford English Dictionary. Available at: oed.com (Accessed: 3 November 2026).