Is your anxiety trying to tell you something?

Have you ever felt that your anxiety is more than just a fleeting worry, perhaps pointing to something deeper within? When we take the time to understand and address the root cause of our anxiety, we can begin to make lasting change.

Recent data suggests that over 8 million people in the UK are living with anxiety at any given time. Anxiety is a normal, in-built human response to stress. It can even be helpful, giving us the nudge we need to prepare for that big meeting or exam. From an evolutionary perspective, those who were most alert and responsive to danger were the ones who survived and passed on their genes.

But when anxiety starts to take over, when feelings of dread or excessive worry begin to dominate our day-to-day lives, or we find ourselves avoiding things we used to manage with ease, it may be time to pause and take stock.

When clients come to counselling with anxiety, they often say they want to “stop feeling anxious” or “get rid of these horrible feelings.” And who can blame them? No one wants to wake up with a racing heart or feel panic bubbling up during a simple trip to the shops. These goals are completely understandable, but in therapy, they’re not always the most workable starting point.

That’s because anxiety is often a free-floating emotion - it tends to latch onto different situations, like a game of Whack-A-Mole. You might resolve your anxiety about driving, only to find yourself fretting about whether you locked the front door. This makes more sense when we start to view anxiety not as the core problem, but as a symptom – something that signals an unmet need or a deeper discomfort. And just like any symptom, the key to lasting change is in understanding the root cause.

Therapy is a space where this kind of exploration can happen. But in the meantime, here are three things you can start doing now to support yourself.

3 ways to help you manage anxiety 

1. Start with the basics

It might sound simple, but checking in with your basic needs is a powerful place to begin. As humans, we all share a hierarchy of needs; nutrition, sleep, safety, and connection. If you’re feeling anxious, ask yourself: Have I slept enough? Eaten something nourishing? Had some fresh air or movement? Meeting these foundational needs can sometimes shift our emotional state more than we realise.

2. Notice your thoughts

Pay attention to the inner dialogue that accompanies your anxiety. Often, anxious thoughts are predictive, they imagine something unbearable happening in the future. These are usually followed by thoughts about how unbearable it is to feel anxious itself. This creates a loop that can feel impossible to break.

The good news? With the right tools, it is possible to interrupt this cycle. Simple strategies like grounding techniques or reframing unhelpful thoughts can bring a surprising amount of relief.

3. Stop trying to “get rid” of it

I know this sounds counterintuitive. Naturally, we want to eliminate anything that makes us feel uncomfortable or afraid. But if you’ve tried to push anxiety away (perhaps through avoidance, distraction, or self-soothing behaviours), and it’s still showing up, it may be time to try a different approach.

Because here’s the thing: What we resist, persists. Sometimes, the strategies we use to cope, like excessive reassurance-seeking, that extra glass of wine, or zoning out in front of the TV, can create more problems in the long run.

So what can you do instead? Meet yourself where you are. Accepting the presence of anxiety doesn’t mean giving up – it means creating a starting point for change. As Carl Rogers beautifully said:

“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”

As strange as this may sound, true transformation often begins with acceptance.

If any of this resonates with you and you're ready to explore what your anxiety might be trying to tell you, you don’t have to do it alone. Working with a counsellor can help you unpack these experiences safely and compassionately.