How depression can be helpful
In Oxfordshire, the county I practice in, there are currently over 80,000 people diagnosed with depression (Oxfordshire Community Foundation Report 2021). Since the pandemic, the number of people seeking help for depression increased by 25% (WHO, 2022) and the number currently diagnosed is nearly 50% more than it was 30 years ago (Science Direct, 2020).

There's no doubt that this 'illness' is a global issue on the rise. More and more people are finding they 'can't cope' with life. Things feel so overwhelming, that they feel stuck, lost, alone and isolated.
As Johann Hari writes in his wonderful book, Lost Connections, a reality of our modern society is that we are spending more time glued to our phones and less time with one another and our natural environment.
We feel depressed because we have lost connection with who we are. Our depression is a warning signal from our brain to tell us something's wrong. Something is wrong. We are seeking happiness in all the wrong places.
Since we are very young we are told what we need to be happy. It usually goes something along the lines of this: get good grades, a well-paid job, marry, don't divorce, have kids and then make sure they follow the same pattern you have.
Because we don't have a choice, we follow this blueprint (or we don't and 'consciously rebel', seeking our happiness in the fact that 'we know better/different'). We might follow it for 20, 30, 40 or 50 years before we realise that something's not right. Where is the happiness we were promised?
The 'mid-life crisis' is, for many of us, our 'wake up' moment. If life hasn't taught us already that there is not a map or formula to be followed, it becomes harder to ignore as we complete the 'checklist' and still aren't seeing the 'promised' rewards.
The truth is, we have been (inadvertently) lied to. Lasting happiness cannot be found out there. The pleasure we get from a new car, job promotion or expensive holiday is only ever temporary. When we return to 'normality' we might sense that underlying dis-ease again. That little nagging voice we try so hard to ignore, which asks us 'Is this really all there is?'
The answer is, of course, no. There is more to life than we have been told. The nagging voice, the hopeless feelings, the despair and frustration are real. It's there for a purpose. It's there to wake you up.
Reframing depression
Many people treat depression as an illness. These are the people who want to 'solve' it. To 'get you back to normal', so that you can be a functioning member of society again. It serves their best interests to have you following the blueprint everyone else follows. If you don't do the work in addressing and understanding your depression (and finding a way out!) then they don't have to either.
The problem is, many of us are already experiencing depression. It's too late to go back. We are 'waking up' to reality. We are seeing that the way we've lived up until now hasn't made us happy and we're looking for another way.
This is where therapy, and the right kind of therapy, is vital.
How therapy can help
When we have the courage to seek help from a professional who has experienced what we're going through and come out the other side, we can do it for ourselves too. On the other side of depression is joy. On the other side of being stuck is freedom.
Therapy can help us reconnect with who we were before we were told who we were by others. We can reclaim our true selves outside the confines of others' expectations. We can let go of our insecurities, our personal baggage and the negative voice in our head that tells us we're not good enough.
The truth is, depression is a wake-up call. And, to this degree, provided it is managed carefully and with good therapy, it might just be our greatest ally.
