Anger: the good, the bad, and the ugly

If you have ever suffered from intense feelings of anger or uncontrolled outbursts of rage, you will understand how destructive anger can be.

Internalised, or repressed, anger can harm us by triggering a fight-or-flight response in the sympathetic nervous system, keeping the body in a constant state of alert and physiological stress (S. Garfinkel et al. 2015; SCAN 11).

Studies suggest anger heightens our cortisol levels by turning unresolved emotional energy inward, which can trigger a raised heart rate, shortness of breath, gut inflammation, a clenched jaw and relentless muscle tension (S. Lupi et al. 2014; Endoneurocrinology 49). However, there are some nuances between men and women regarding whether cortisol levels are raised.

As a psychotherapist using a sensori-motor approach to psychotherapy, I help clients identify the differences and similarities between their psychological states and physiological sensations.

This practice was initially developed through the integration of neuroscience, anthropology and psychology in the seminal work of B. Van der Kolk (2014)  so that his clients could learn to track their physical sensations and emotions as they arise in body and mind. He helped clients self-regulate overwhelming feelings of distress in response to trauma. This is because, as one organism, your brain, nervous system and body act as one integrated biological network.

But there is a clear distinction between experiencing the emotions of anger and acting on it once the fight-and-flight response has been activated. Feeling angry is not the same as acting on it. If anger is vented impulsively through aggression or destructive behaviours, it can do immense harm to you and the people around you. For example, it can make family and friends feel threatened, fearful, or sometimes transition into repetitive cycles of physical and emotional abuse.

However, not all anger is bad. Expressing anger can also be a valid response to feeling threatened, or establishing appropriate boundaries to protect yourself. If you're avoidant of conflict, or afraid of an outburst, there are better ways of regulating your emotions and expressing anger in a constructive way.

It’s vital to understand that anger can work for, or against you, and not to give anger a ‘bad name’.  Anger can help you to express yourself, find your voice, and identify your needs to others when it is expressed proportionately. Anger can also be expressed to bring about constructive change in your relationships by resetting boundaries and helping you to reassert your needs in a conflict.

So, it can help to develop self-awareness and identify the early-warning signs of anger, before it escalates disproportionately. Studies show that if you learn to observe the sensations of stress, you can often identify the anger before it builds up, rather than simply react, or let it escalate into a catastrophic outburst (L. Nummenmaa et al. 2018; PNAS .115).

Anger: the good

You may be surprised to learn that anger isn’t all bad for you. Anger is a natural emotion and is there to mobilise you into action. Research indicates anger shifts physical resources towards immediate action by enhancing your ability to mobilise and make decisions (J. Suttie, 2024 GGSC; mind.co.uk).

But this 'call-to-action' doesn't necessarily lead to violent or aggressive behaviour. Anger helps you express your boundaries or meet your survival needs by solving real-world problems and facing down threats (P. Robson, 2026; Understanding Anger).

There are positives to anger. Anger is a neurological impulse triggered by the sympathetic nervous system in response to a physical or emotional threat (E. Dougherty, 2011; Harvard Medicine). It is wired into your autonomic nervous system and designed to be triggered during a fight-or-flight response. Anger will emerge, intensify and pass as you adapt to your interactions with others.

• You may notice anger as an intense physical/emotional energy that causes your heart rate to pick up, your breathing to intensify, pupils to dilate, and jaw clenching, while heat rises in your chest and throat, or your back and shoulders brace for attack. This triggers a vital defence mechanism when you need to protect yourself. 
• Anger can be engaged during conflict to generate change, when you are determined to find a resolution in an argument.
• Anger can help you address and alter the status quo, or face up to your problems and seek to solve them.
• Anger and frustration can also help you tackle or overcome an obstacle that keeps getting in your way, such as a challenge in sport, or when you're competing for an opportunity at work.
• Anger enables you to stand up for yourself, meet your survival needs and establish firm boundaries with people who violate your personal space. For example, if you've ever been the victim of abuse while you were too vulnerable or helpless to fight back, then using anger to stand up for yourself can feel empowering and heal old wounds.
• Anger can release you from becoming desensitised after experiencing trauma (B. Van der Kolk, 2014). Undifferentiated emotions that have not returned to a state of homeostasis (internal balance) in the body can become trapped inside you. If you learn to express anger affirmatively with a clear objective in mind, this can be both cathartic and liberating.

Anger: the bad

There is a clear distinction, however, between feeling angry and acting on impulse if you show a high degree of nervous reactivity (R. J. Blair, 2016; JCAP 26). Sometimes, of course, the emotions behind your anger can be overwhelming and trigger aggression or destructive behaviour, which is harmful to others. This usually happens when you've become dysregulated, and anger has been discharged impulsively, especially when it boils over into rage.

Persistent anger can also be harmful or pathological if it causes repetitive patterns of violence, especially if you unleash it on your loved ones, family and friends (N. Alia-Klein, 2020; NBR. 108).

In this case, you need to attend to your feelings and express your needs more openly, long before they escalate beyond control or fester inside. Otherwise, anger is more likely to build up and become explosive. This is why it's better to address your concerns earlier, in a healthy way, when your emotions are more stable and manageable.

• Anger can lead to the build-up of stress hormones like cortisol (S. Kahle, 2016; JECP 142), so you become emotionally reactive and impulsive. This increases the likelihood of negative behavioural cycles, but it can also lead to internalised rage destabilising you from the inside.
• You may become highly impatient and intolerant of other people’s emotions without any particular reason.
• Unexpressed anger can become unpredictable and disproportionate to those around you, especially if you explode into shouting, screaming and violating other people's emotional space.
• Dysregulated anger can lead to unprovoked violence(S. Kahle, 2016; JEPC 142).
• Research indicates unexpressed anger can get compressed into your gut and muscle tissues - such as your jaw muscles, the back of your neck and shoulders, as well as the lower back, buttocks, and thighs (J. Burns, 2014; J Behav. Med.) This causes an intense state of threat arousal, hyperactivity, and defensiveness.
• When anger is left to fester, it may cause you to hold onto a rigid posture, muscle tension, shallow breathing and compression of the diaphragm, as the body freezes in the face of perceived threat (K. Roelofs, 2010; Psychol Sci 21)

Anger: the ugly

A slow build-up of stress hormones like cortisol (see ref. above) can flood the body and inflame it, leading to an excess build-up of negative energy and tension. When anger is not expressed, mobilised or discharged, it can, over time, lead to internal stress and physical harm. Anger may also inflame your digestive tract and cause acid reflux, leading to worse symptoms of IBS (P. Welgan, 1988; Gastroenterology, 94), while raised cortisol levels can interfere with natural sleeping cycles.

On the Mind website, you can also find research that has shown these are the common physiological effects of prolonged anger.

The immediate effects of anger can include:

• heart palpitations, racing heart rate
• hyperventilation and panic attacks
• hot flushes in the neck and face
• outbursts of rage, violence and aggression
• tremors in the hands and legs
• jaw clenching and unnecessary teeth grinding
• dilated pupils, eye-bulging.

The long-term symptoms of anger can include:

• a chronic build-up of cortisol
• muscle fatigue and compression
• acid reflux, gut and organ inflammation (see ref. above)
• high blood pressure
• tension headaches/migraines
• tight diaphragm, breath-holding during periods of long-term stress
• lactic acid build-up causing muscle cramps (J. Burns, 2013; J. Behav Med. 37)
• restless sleep.

How to pause, step back and release your anger

You may have developed such an embedded pattern of anger that the slightest trigger instantly sets off a cascade of emotional responses you find impossible to resist. You may be reacting to a trip-wire in your sympathetic nervous system which makes your behaviour unpredictable. And you may be so overly aroused (hypervigilant) that you react without warning at the slightest hint of criticism or personal rejection.

Emotions like anger are deeply wired into your unconscious brain for an immediate response to survival needs and can be difficult to consciously change once escalated. Instead, it helps to learn to regulate your emotions before the anger escalates.

Here's what can help with this:

Pausing

If you notice the early 'warning signs' of hypervigilance and escalating anger, you can learn to pause lower down the scale, then step back and take a long, deep breath. Breathing really does help.

Breathing 

Studies confirm that if you try to develop a pattern of slow, diaphragmatic breathing, it deactivates your stress response and helps de-escalate anger (Hamasaki 2020; MDPI. 7). Pay close attention by listening to the sound and sensation of your breath, as you slow down. You are not necessarily trying to be calm, empty your mind, or switch off your thoughts. You are simply providing a space for you to develop some awareness.

Observing your emotions 

You can learn how to observe your psychological states and how they impact your body by scanning your physical sensations on a daily basis. Observing lower down the scale, before you're triggered, when emotions are less intense, allows you to make conscious choices rather than just react on impulse. Just being able to observe your sensations and name them, or express them to yourself, can be an empowering experience.

Try to find a calm, quiet place to reflect on your emotions as they arise in your body, long before they escalate or overwhelm you. Or, find a rigorous exercise to help you discharge unspent emotional energy.

Early intervention

Once you are aware of your physical sensations like tightness in your chest, muscle tension, jaw-grinding, heat in your throat or a build-up of acid reflux, you're able to identify the early warning signs and attend to them before they become disruptive.

Self-regulation 

Your body will tell you what you need to do to soothe, regulate, and release that build-up of emotional energy. Sometimes deep, slow breathing is enough. Sometimes stretching tense muscles, rigorous exercise or walking off your tension is also useful. Even being able to adjust your posture, unclench your jaw, reach out for physical affection, or softening your stance can help. 

Being in the natural world is often a safer place for some people where they can release their everyday stresses and feel held by the surrounding environment.

Express anger

Try to express your anger in a way that is manageable, valid and tolerable enough for other people to hear what you have to say. Assert your boundaries where necessary, and encourage other people to express themselves openly without defensiveness or shame.

Restoration and a sense of safety

We are all ultimately trying to find a safe place to dwell in the world and feel at peace with our loved ones. Once you put time aside to observe your emotions and develop an internal awareness of your physical sensations, you will restore your ability to respond mindfully.

There is no such thing as a good emotion or a bad emotion. All emotions can work for you or against you. Emotions are simply a form of physiological and psychological information. They are telling you something about yourself. If you learn to reflect and listen, you can identify what emotions you're feeling and express them validly, long before they take control of you.