Overcoming imposter syndrome: How therapy can help

Imposter syndrome is a pervasive feeling of self-doubt and inadequacy that can creep into even the most successful individual’s life. Despite evidence of competence, those experiencing imposter syndrome constantly feel as though they are ‘faking it’ and are at risk of being exposed as frauds. It’s an internal narrative that erodes self-esteem and can lead to chronic stress, anxiety, and even depression. But with the right therapeutic support, you can move through this experience, reclaim your confidence, and live with greater authenticity.

What is imposter syndrome?

Imposter syndrome is characterised by the persistent belief that your achievements are due to luck, timing, or other external factors rather than your skills or intelligence. This can show up in various aspects of life - perhaps you’ve been promoted at work, earned recognition in your field, or are seen as a competent parent or friend - yet inside, you feel undeserving of the praise.

Here’s a thought many with imposter syndrome share: “It’s only a matter of time before they realise I’m not good enough.”

This phenomenon can affect anyone, but it’s especially common in high-achievers, perfectionists, and individuals in demanding professional environments. Ironically, the more you achieve, the stronger the feeling of being a fraud may become.

Common signs of imposter syndrome

• You constantly downplay your accomplishments, attributing them to external factors or luck.
• You avoid seeking new opportunities out of fear of failing or being “found out.”
• You hold yourself to impossibly high standards and feel anxious when you don’t meet them.
• You’re afraid of asking for help, believing it will reveal your “incompetence.”

Even when you succeed, you worry it’s a fluke or that you just got lucky this time.
These thoughts can become an exhausting cycle, leaving you feeling stuck and disconnected from the truth of your abilities. But there is a way through this pattern of thinking.

How a therapist can help you work through imposter syndrome

Overcoming imposter syndrome is not just about boosting your self-esteem; it requires a deeper exploration of the beliefs and thought patterns that fuel feelings of inadequacy. A skilled therapist can provide the right therapeutic interventions to help you untangle these thoughts and reframe how you see yourself.

Here’s how therapy can support you:

1. Exploring core beliefs and root causes through developmental psychology

A therapist drawing on principles of developmental psychology can help you understand how your sense of self has been shaped throughout your life. Often, imposter syndrome originates in earlier stages of development, where key moments or relationships - whether with caregivers, peers, or authority figures - may have left you with internalised beliefs about your worth. These might include messages like, “I’m not good enough,” or “I have to be perfect to be loved.”

By revisiting these formative experiences, therapy provides a safe space to challenge these outdated beliefs and make sense of how they continue to shape your identity. Developmental psychology focuses on the process of psychological growth, helping you recognise areas where you may have become ‘stuck’ or where your emotional development has been arrested. Through this process, you can move toward healthier maturation, freeing yourself from the patterns of thinking that no longer serve you.

2. Transactional analysis: Understanding your inner dialogue

Another effective therapeutic approach for addressing imposter syndrome is transactional analysis (TA), which focuses on the interactions between different aspects of the self, often referred to as the Parent, Adult, and Child. These ‘ego states’ represent different facets of how we relate to ourselves and others, and they often play a key role in perpetuating imposter syndrome.

• The parent: This ego state may be critical and authoritative, feeding thoughts such as, “You’re not good enough” or “You mustn’t fail.”
• The child: This part of you might feel small, vulnerable, and scared of being exposed, echoing a sense of shame or inadequacy.
• The adult: The adult ego state is the rational, grounded part of the self, capable of analysing situations objectively and without emotional distortion.

Through transactional analysis, a therapist helps you become more aware of these internal dialogues and teaches you how to shift from a dominant critical parent or anxious child into a balanced adult state. This can be a powerful tool for managing imposter syndrome, allowing you to respond to challenges with greater confidence and self-assurance. By strengthening your Adult ego state, you can learn to quieten the inner critic and recognise your achievements without dismissing them.

3. Practising self-compassion

People with imposter syndrome are often incredibly hard on themselves. A therapist can help you cultivate self-compassion - learning to treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer a friend. Through techniques like mindfulness and self-compassion exercises, you’ll begin to soften the harsh inner critic and develop a more compassionate relationship with yourself.

4. Building emotional resilience

Imposter syndrome is often triggered by external stressors - whether it’s a new job, increased responsibility, or stepping out of your comfort zone. Therapy can equip you with emotional resilience strategies, helping you to manage stress and anxiety more healthily. These tools will allow you to face new challenges without the constant fear of failure.

5. Breaking the perfectionism cycle

Many individuals experiencing imposter syndrome also struggle with perfectionism. They set impossibly high standards for themselves and feel like failures when they don’t achieve them. Therapy can help you break this cycle by encouraging you to embrace the concept of “good enough.” This doesn’t mean settling for less, but rather understanding that perfection is an illusion, and your worth is not contingent on flawless performance.

Actionable steps to begin your journey of overcoming imposter syndrome

If imposter syndrome is affecting your confidence and well-being, here are some steps you can take right now to start addressing these feelings:

• Acknowledge your thoughts: Recognise when imposter thoughts arise and name them for what they are - a mental pattern, not a reflection of your true abilities.
• Challenge the narrative: Ask yourself, “What evidence do I have to support the idea that I’m not good enough?” Often, the facts don’t align with the feelings.
• Keep a success journal: Write down your accomplishments, both big and small, and review them regularly. This helps reinforce the reality of your achievements.
• Talk about it: Share your experiences of imposter syndrome with someone you trust. Opening up can relieve the pressure of feeling like you have to keep it hidden.
• Seek professional help: If imposter syndrome is significantly impacting your life, working with a therapist can provide the tools and support needed to move forward.

Moving forward with confidence

Imposter syndrome doesn’t have to control your life. With the guidance of a skilled therapist, you can uncover the underlying causes of these feelings, challenge unhelpful beliefs, and build a more grounded sense of self-worth. By using approaches like developmental psychology and transactional analysis, you can better understand your inner dialogue and begin to mature emotionally, leading to healthier adaptations in life. As you acknowledge your strengths and accept your achievements, you’ll feel more empowered to step into your success with confidence and authenticity.