Mary Mcilroy

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BACP Accredited (Anxiety specialist). Bupa listed 30060387
Available for new clients
Available for new clients

This professional is available for new clients.

Muswell Hill N10 & Central London SE1
Available for new clients
Available for new clients

This professional is available for new clients.

About me

Can you imagine what life could be like as a result of a counsellors guidance?

I am Mary Mcilroy, an Accredited counsellor and I can help you cope when you are stuck or feeling unfulfilled. I aim to help you change the patterns and overcome any difficulties which may be preventing you manage so maybe it's time to stop wondering what counselling can offer, and come and experience the benefits.

I believe there is no reason for anyone to continue to feel sad, anxious or depressed. My goal is to help you understand what’s going on and improve what’s not working. I believe that negative situations can be used as a catalyst to push you forward and can even motivate you toward achieving the change you desire. Having Epilepsy myself I vow never allow life’s challenges overcome us. 

How can I help? 

For counselling to work we build a relationship based on trust. During the process you will be listened to with empathy while you feel and see change happen as anxiety melts away.  I consult with leading supervisors and top psychotherapists in confidence to ensure quality therapy for my clients.

Sadly there is no magic. I can't prescribe you with pills or lotions. There is no lying down on a couch with me sitting in a white coat pen and paper in hand. Instead, we will sit in comfy chairs and you will do most of the talking, I do the listening and together we reflect and arrive at the 'right answer' for you. In therapy we will discuss the behaviours which you then need to practise in life outside, an effort from both of us helps to bring forth the change you long for.

I can offer Online Anxiety, Panic & Epilepsy Counselling via Zoom, Skype or in person and have plenty of experience with difficult decision making if this is your dilemma. I specialise in treating the range of Anxiety issues (panic attacks, confidence, relationship decisions and more) I use brief and practical counselling to provide tools and help you manage .

I now have epilepsy and face certain conditions which require a degree of creativity and resilience. My disability is also a benefit, as I have learned to work with problems until I find the solution. I studied Mindfulness Teacher training in the award winning Breathworks centre, you will be surprised how your suffering can be replaced by a love of life.  The founder of this centre won the BMA award for Popular Medicine (the category in the 2014 Medical Book Awards).  She is one of the most widely respected names in the field of Mindfulness and pain management. I am registered with Bupa and offer counselling with them.

I’m happy to work on any issue you choose.

My approach

I'm committed to providing the type of counselling I'd want for someone I love. (A cool, judgemental attitude is something you’ll never get from me).

If you want a counsellor who sits back saying “tell me more about this…….” or "Uh huh” this is not me. Or if you want a highly intellectual type of analyst who spends multiple sessions analysing dream’s then I am not the right person for you.

I am an active counsellor who gets involved in therapy. One who gives advice, homework, reviews and feedback on progress. I will answer most questions as I believe counselling is a collaborative process resulting in change.  My fulfilment is seeing you move forward. 

Many people have excellent insights into their issues yet are still stuck, people like this need a powerful psychological jump start to help them move forward.  Our work together will promote this movement, counselling is not a forever process. You should feel and see change happening.  I review and offer life & career coaching to help you monitor your progress.

Getting started

The first session can be a free call, giving us the opportunity to meet before commitment.  I offer Brief Counselling and aim to help you get the most from your therapy.

The first session is an opportunity for us to meet and get to know each other. It will be a space for you to ask any questions you may have about me or the counselling process and to talk about what brings you to counselling.  Online counselling is an optional method for initial sessions.

Within a safe environment, you will be encouraged to take risks, try new things, and practice the change you hope to achieve.  All aspects of the counselling process are designed to help you experience real behavioural change and eliminate the problems that add to stress and impede healthy relationships.

It can be difficult to talk to those close to you as they often, understandably, struggle to remain impartial. Sometimes professional support is needed so that you can express yourself to someone who has no vested interest in you being any particular way and who will not be shocked, overwhelmed or judgemental about what you have to say.  It can be surprising how valuable it can be to have a space where you can be helped to explore for yourself what your own responses, perceptions and feelings are, to find fresh and unimagined ways of looking at problematic emotions, inner blocks, relationship difficulties & anxious situations.  Following my accreditation I have trained in Mindfulness, Relationships and practise regular meditation, all of which my client benefits from.

Linking Thinking with Confidence:

Tell yourself:

  • The people who look beautiful are the same as you, the difference is they tell themselves they look good, that shines through.
  • The people who say the most profound witty things as the same as you, they are letting go and being who they are.
  • The people who appear confident and relaxed are no different, they push themselves through fearful situations and tell themselves they can make it.
  • The people who are successful are the same as you, they tell themselves go ahead and develop your gifts and talents, set goals.
  • We are all the same as the people on TV. It's what we tell ourselves that makes the difference.
  • So give yourself a big hug, tell yourself you are alright, you can be wonderful. Is a change of thinking needed? Anon

Friedrich Nietzsche, “He who has a why to live can bear almost any how.”

Training, qualifications & experience

Are you looking for accredited and experienced counselling & therapy? My professional background is in education and as I have always been drawn to helping people this work brought me into counselling services (including counselling teenagers in inclusion units). I have also worked as a volunteer counsellor with Victim Support for seven years. My Counselling & Psychotherapy training is the fully accredited Psychosynthesis & Education Trust, throughout my career I achieved:.

  1. I initially trained as a teacher and achieved a PGCE in Education from SouthBank university.
  2.  Later I became an Accredited Counsellor  - awarded by the BACP.
  3. I am now a BUPA registered counsellor / therapist.
  4. Sex therapy training (Spectrum Therapy Centre).
  5. CBT diploma ('CBT with Heart') run by Adrian Hemmings from the university of Chester.
  6. Certificate in Eco-psychology from the psychosynthesis Trust.
  7. Prior to counselling I gained a BA (Hons) in Business Studies from Middlesex university.
  8. PG Diploma in Counselling & Psychotherapy awarded by UEL.
    Certificate in Person-Centred Counselling
    Mindfulness Teacher training through the highly respected ‘Breath-works' organisation.
  9. My counselling training is validated by the BACP (British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy).  I regularly undertake continuing professional development courses to enrich my skills and practice. (I am currently developing my couples counselling skills).
  10. I previously worked as a volunteer with Victim Support where I trained to deal with physical, sexual and domestic violence.
  11. I have counselled teenagers in secondary schools and provided foster support for the Borough of Haringey. I believe my experience in various counselling settings and my education in child development and teaching complements my work as a therapist today.
  12. I have trained as a couple and relationship counsellor which enables me to offer relationship counselling in Muswell Hill, London Bridge, The City of London and online.
  13. I work with MIND counselling those with severe mental health issues and suicidal ideation.
  14. My experience includes assisting training workshops at the Psychosynthesis & Education Trust in London Bridge SE1, the City of London.
  15. I am a member of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP). I adhere to their professional code of practice and am engaged in regular clinical supervision.

    I am Irish born in Dublin Ireland.

Member organisations

British Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy (BACP)

BACP is one of the UK’s leading professional bodies for counselling and psychotherapy with around 60,000 members. The Association has several different categories of membership, including Student Member, Individual Member, Registered Member MBACP, Registered Accredited Member MBACP (Accred) and Senior Registered Accredited Member MBACP (Snr Acccred).

Registered and accredited members are listed on the BACP Register, which shows that they have demonstrated BACP’s recommended standards for training, proficiency and ethical practice. The BACP Register was the first register of psychological therapists to be accredited by the Professional Standards Authority (PSA).

Accredited and senior accredited membership are voluntary categories for members who choose to undertake a rigorous application and assessment process to demonstrate additional standards around practice, training and supervision.

Individual members will have completed an appropriate counselling or psychotherapy course and started to practise, but they won’t appear on the BACP Register until they've demonstrated that they meet the standards for registration. Student members are still in the process of completing their training.

All members are bound by the BACP Ethical Framework and a Professional Conduct Procedure.

Accredited register membership

British Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy
Accredited Register Scheme

The Accredited Register Scheme was set up in 2013 by the Department of Health (DoH) as a way to recognise organisations that hold voluntary registers which meet certain standards. These standards are set by the Professional Standards Authority (PSA).

This therapist has indicated that they belong to an Accredited Register.

British Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy

Areas of counselling I deal with

Other areas of counselling I deal with

My Special Strengths:

One of my strengths lie in working with relationship struggles. Areas such as loneliness, difficulty getting past the first date, low self-esteem or finding a suitable partner may be causing you anxiety, depression or even issues such as panic attacks and social phobia.  Panic attacks, relationships, lack of confidence and anxiety counselling are now counselling issues I have a lot of experience with (if one such is your sore spot).

Such relationship problems can surface at any time, either within a relationship or even when single. These difficulties can show up in a variety of ways including uncertainty, distrust, anger, feeling like you are being controlled or causing you to repeat patterns in the areas of work, family, relationship and love life.

In our counselling I help you to become more confident, productive, happy and pleased with yourself. As a result you are more likely to become more genuine, reach towards your potential, more co-operative, authentic and more sought after by others.

One of my specialities is working with Stress and Anxiety:

Take a moment to read about my mission, my aim is to soothe your stress & anxiety:

At some stage we all go through difficult times that affect us physically, emotionally, and even our mental well-being.  While most people do not hesitate to go to a GP for attention, a lot of us delay seeking help for emotional or psychological needs.  As a BACP Accredited counsellor I care about your fears & sensitivities, your behaviours & embarrassments, your worrying stresses and longed for achievements.  I want you to feel comfortable and psychologically educated while we move forward.

As every individual is different and has their own different needs, I offer a range of tools and strategies through the well respected Psychosynthesis Model.  This model includes using Cognitive-Behaviour (CBT), Gestalt and many more while being supported by a leading team of supervisors and therapists myself.

Many individuals seek help for previously undiagnosed conditions which include General Anxiety Disorder (GAD), Panic Attack, Social Anxiety, Sleep difficulty, Lack of Motivation and lack of Confidence, or mystery physical issues (possibly over-eating & self-abusive addictions).  While you may be unsure what you want, and it may be difficult seeking help for undiagnosed areas, I am here to help you achieve basic symptom recognition and therapeutic process.  I believe in moving forward and achieving satisfaction which is why I review your progress at least every six weeks.  I too want to find the treatment that works to relieve your anxiety and I pride myself in this mission while providing you with a comfortable and confidential environment.

What gives me the authority to claim I am a specialist in managing anxiety?

As a person living with epilepsy for more than 20 years, I realise how harmful general anxiety is on our health in many ways.  I have experimented with various means of controlling seizures and found one common theme in triggering them:

When I am under stress physically, emotionally, or mentally I pay the price and my number of seizures increases.

When I monitor and apply strategies the length of time between my seizure’s quadruples.  My anxiety tools have changed feelings of terror about epilepsy to feelings of Blaise.  My sleepless nights of worrying are no more.  My personal anxiety level has dropped from 8/10 to 2/10.

This process of taming my own anxiety has contributed towards achieving BACP Accreditation while giving me the confidence to claim I can help other people’s anxiety in many areas.   

I believe there is no reason for anyone to continue feel anxious or depressed and also believe that negative situations can be used as a catalyst to push you forward and even motivate you toward achieving the lasting changes you desire. As a person with epilepsy, I had to learn how to turn a disability into an advantage and how to cope with self-esteem issues, relationship difficulties, stress, panic attacks and anxiety. In addition I have studied Mindfulness Meditation which I practise daily and often introduce in sessions to help calm anxiety and ease depression.  I believe managing your weight and managing your life are interwoven, I can provide the psychological interventions to help you create & achieve your personal plan.

I strive to help people with anxiety disorders achieve a calm confidence and those with relationship difficulties to find a heart-felt resolution, in addition:
I can help those who are in crisis or have general depression, anxiety, panic attacks or stress, with:   life & career coaching, confidence building relationship issues(& sexual dysfunction). I can help them figure out ways to resolve their difficulties, traumas, gain happiness and pursue life goals. Counselling also helps to examine and modify any long-standing patterns that may interfere with a client's functioning, relationships, sexuality issues and quality of life.

I provide tools to help with all above difficulties.  I continuously research areas area of areas of anxiety in order to advance my clients process.  I am also pleased to say I assist in tutoring in advanced counselling in anxiety areas. 

Although I focus on anxiety, depression, confidence and relationship difficulties I have a wide range of experience counselling people with other issues.  I believe all issues overlap and I enjoy helping people inside the therapy room to bring that joy outside into their life.  If I have not listed your particular issue above please feel free to contact me.

I’ve always believed that we can get more out of life if we’re willing to change. And I know now that change is possible in the deepest sense you can imagine.  Years ago, after studying in Dublin (where I'm from) I pulled up my roots and became a Londoner.

My education and training continued in London with a B.A. in Business Studies (parallel to a banking career) then later a PGCE in Education. Next step volunteering for Victim support and then a counselling career.  I have since counselled a wide variety of problems for over two decades. I have always been drawn to helping people and this brought me to work in counselling services, which provided me with a new sense of purpose in what I was doing.

The issues that bring my patients into treatment are usually highly specific. A difficult transition in life, work stress, relationship difficulties, sexual issues, anxiety and more.  I’ve noticed that when they improve in that one area, they often report an ability to solve problems and enjoy life more in other areas as well. How can that be?

After looking into the matter, I believe it reflects what is called neuroplasticity— the brain’s amazing ability to literally rewire itself through a process of concerted thinking, learning, and acting.

It’s the same process that shapes a child’s abilities in the first place. And that, I think, helps explain why warmth and caring on the part of a counsellor — much like that of a good parent — is essential to successful treatment. As one review of more than 500 studies of the effect of therapeutic empathy has concluded, “the evidence is nothing short of amazing.”

If you’re having a difficult relationship in work or your private life, or if you’re scarcely having any relationships at all, give me a call. If you are suffering from anxiety, panic attacks, stress, bereavement, loneliness, sexual issues or a host of other difficulties do not hesitate, contact me. You were meant to do better.

One final thought: as a counsellor I always enjoy seeing patients become energised and optimistic, especially when relationship issues are involved. We human beings are constructed to get most of our fulfilment from how well we relate to others.

It's important for me to be able to offer my clients 'cutting edge' aspects of psychotherapy and counselling hence I have trained to teach Mindfulness in order to maximise the benefits of my service.  (I have studied Mindfulness Meditation which I practise daily and often introduce in sessions to help ease anxiety, lift depression and resolve other difficulties).

I started to work as a counsellor for charities and private organisations over 18 years ago. I have worked for MIND where I counselled for suicidal ideation and severe mental health issues.  I have since trained with Relate where I volunteer as a couple counsellor.

Together we will examine and modify any long-standing patterns that may interfere with your functioning, relationships and quality of life.  In addition I treat those with anxiety, panic attacks, stress, confidence issues, low self-esteem, loneliness, relationship issues and more in London Bridge, The City of London, SE1, Muswell Hill, North London, N10 & Central London.

Photos & videos


£60.00 - £75.00
Free initial telephone session

Health Insurance/EAP

  • BUPA
  • Axa Health
  • Health Assured
  • Aviva
  • Saga
  • Vitality
  • WPA

Additional information

When considering therapy it is natural not to be clear about the length and depth of engagement that is right for you. I recommend that you get in touch and we can arrange an initial meeting by phone (no charge). This will be an opportunity to get to know each other a little, see how it goes and then decide if therapy feels right.

My fees are £60 for individuals & £80 for couples      

After 6 weeks I like to review so you can see what changes have occurred and then you decide whether to continue and how long for. Ending well is our focus from the start.

I require a minimum of 48 hours cancellation notice.

At the moment I offer in person and online sessions via Zoom or Skype.

Start, just see how it goes and you may be pleasantly surprised.

I can offer day or evening sessions, some flexibility in session dates is possible.

When I work

Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

I work three days in Muswell Hill:  Monday, Tuesday, Thursday

I work one day in London Bridge: Wednesday

I am happy to work online if required.

Further information

My practice location

Online or face to face

I am a counsellor in London Bridge SE1, offer therapy in the City of London and also offer counselling in Muswell Hill, N10, North London - both locations are easily accessible. 

My counselling in Muswell Hill, N10, North London is close to the following areas:
Finchley, Highgate, Crouch End, Archway, Finsbury Park, Southgate, Barnet, Bounds Green, Wood Green, Arnos Grove, Alexandra Palace, Cockfosters, Oakwood

It is easy to access my premises in The City of London / Central London, London Bridge SE1. I'm close to the following tubes and rail stations: Aldgate Tube, Bank Station, The Barbican, Blackfriars, Canon Street, King William station, Liverpool St station, Lothbury Tube, Ludgate Circus Tube, Mansion House Tube, Mark Lane Tube, Moorgate station, St Pauls station, The City of London square.


I have over 17 years experience and the following people felt recovered enough to state:

 "I had 12 sessions with Mary and she helped me a great deal. I found her very intuitive, calm, kind and patient. I definitely benefitted hugely from my weekly hour with her and she enabled me to really move forward" Client with confidence, stress and depression issues.

"I came to Mary with self confidence issues and anxiety, particularly in social situations. During my sessions with Mary I was able to confront the reasons for my feelings of anxiety and develop new ways of thinking that have helped me immensely in moving forward in a positive direction. Mary's calm and patient approach was exactly what I needed and I'm extremely grateful for her help in working towards a better me" Client with anxiety and confidence issues.

"Mary helped me through a difficult period of my life. I had twelve sessions with her, which helped me to see more clearly and to overcome some grief and relationship issues I had. She is easy to talk to, very kind and wise. I would recommend her to anyone with similar problems."

Published articles

132 Grosvenor Road, Muswell Hill, North London, N10 2DT

92-94 Tooley St, London Bridge, Central London, SE1 2TH

Type of session

In person

Types of client

Young people (13-17)
Young adults (18-24)
Adults (25-64)
Older Adults (65+)
Employee Assistance Programme

Key details

DBS check

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Wheelchair user access
Wheelchair user access

Wheelchair-accessible premises should have step-free access for wheelchair users and individuals who are unable to climb stairs. If a Counsellor's premises aren't step-free, they may offer alternative services such as telephone/web-based appointments, home visits, or meeting clients in different location, so you can choose the option that suits you best.

You can contact the Counsellor to discuss the options available.

Under the Equality Act 2010 service providers have a duty to make reasonable adjustments to ensure that individuals with disabilities can access their service. You can read more about reasonable adjustments to help you to access services on the CAB website.

I offer flexible morning - evening sessions Mon to Fri. Early morning can be arranged. Online Tel/support also available Central and North London. Online counselling can be via Zoom or Skype. Session arrangements include a degree of flexibility.

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