Justyna OConnell

You receive a short message and immediately wonder if someone is upset with you. You read it again, check the punctuation and think back over what you might have done wrong. Even when everything seems fine, you monitor other people’s moods and adjust yourself to keep the peace.

You agree to plans when you would rather rest. You take on extra work because saying no feels selfish or difficult. Afterwards, you may feel tired or resentful, but still worry that you have let someone down. When you make a mistake, it stays with you; when you do something well, you quickly move on to what you should have done better.

Perhaps you have spent years being described as capable, helpful or “the strong one.” Other people may not realise how much you overthink, how difficult it is to switch off or how often you question whether you are good enough.

It can be hard to seek therapy when you are used to coping alone. You may worry that your problems are not serious enough, or that talking about yourself is self-indulgent. You do not need to be in crisis or know exactly where to begin.

In therapy, we can explore:

·       why other people’s approval feels so important and their disappointment so difficult to tolerate

·       what happens inside you when you say no, make a mistake or put yourself first

·       how becoming capable, accommodating or self-critical may once have helped you

·       how to recognise your own needs without being overwhelmed by guilt

I work integratively, adapting therapy to you rather than following a set programme. We may connect present situations with earlier relationships, notice what happens between us in the room, and pay attention to emotional and bodily responses that are difficult to put into words.

I offer therapy in English and Polish, in person in Hale and Altrincham and online across the UK. If you recognise yourself here, you are welcome to contact me for a free introductory call so we can consider whether working together feels right.

What I can help with:

Anxiety, overthinking and difficulty switching off
People-pleasing and difficulty setting boundaries
Perfectionism and a harsh inner critic
Guilt, shame and low self-esteem
Relationship and communication difficulties
Stress, overwhelm and feeling emotionally exhausted
Grief and bereavement
Parenthood and significant life changes
The impact of difficult early experiences
Cultural identity and belonging

I offer some concession rate and review my fees annually.