Linda Wolfenden

Hi,
I've been helping individuals, couples and groups to build self-esteem and to manage physical and psychological life changes since 2000.

What a lot of the areas of counselling have in common is low self-worth or self-esteem issues. Feelings of guilt or repressed anger that lead to depression and anxiety. If you've said 'I want to get back to being me' or 'I've forgotten who 'me' is', counselling can help.

Anxiety and depression are perhaps more common than people realise. Some people experience one or the other; some experience both. We are not born with anxiety - we learn to be anxious. Therefore we can 'unlearn.' You likely need certainty in your life, yet life has no guarantees, no certainty. Working towards acceptance of 'certain enough' is the key. It takes time, many small steps, consistency and commitment, but it is possible. 

Depression is often the consequence of traumatic experiences, often involving loss of some kind, which can leave us feeling hopeless and helpless to the point of complete overwhelm. This can be worked through in a way that validates, supports and motivates. In the 1980s, psychotherapist Irvine Yalom gave us the 4 givens of existential therapy: meaning, isolation, freedom and death. He understood that to exist living a fulfilled, happy and successful life, we have certain needs that have to be experienced and met.  Life without meaning or purpose, or lived alone without attachment to trusted others will not fulfil our needs. With freedom comes responsibility, and so a life lived with too much or not enough responsibility also will leave us unfulfilled. Death - the one thing we cannot avoid - causes fear in some, often because the experience of death or loss has left such a void in their lives. This subsequent fear of death often means a person finds it difficult to commit to life and living. They are often afraid to really live, to risk, to challenge, to experience. The consequence of this is a life less lived, a small and often unhappy life in which joy and celebration become tinged with sadness, and this sadness becomes a facet of their identity. Some people struggle to assert themselves or to feel comfortable just being.  If any of the above is a concern for you, you are not irrational and you are not alone.   

Nothing is ever new and everything is connected. "Men are disturbed not by the things which happen, but by their opinions about the things,“ said Greek philosopher Epictetus over 2000 years ago and we still struggle with what it means to be human. Together we can build coping strategies by looking at the situation from a different perspective, or 'reframing'. By exploring and challenging personal values, attitudes and beliefs that lead to negative patterns of thought, feeling and actions, we can break the cycle of self-defeating and self-sabotaging behaviour that is often the cause of our present difficulties.

You are not alone, and you are not the issue. The issue is the issue, and I see the role of the counsellor as helping to facilitate positive change by working alongside you in a non-judgemental and mutual relationship. Simply put, we work together as a team to resolve the issue or issues that cause you concern.

As a counsellor I have worked in the community, in private practice and as a student counsellor in adult education. I have also taught personal development, parenting and counselling courses in adult & community learning. I have been a staff trainer in stress management and mental health awareness. I have considerable experience of working with abuse and domestic violence and have a special interest in stress and anger work. As a foster carer I live with the impact of insecure attachments every day and know only too well the legacy of poor bonding and instability in child development. And we were all children once.

In my 20s I was diagnosed with flitting polyarthritis, a progressive form of chronic rheumatoid arthritis.  That which doesn't kill you makes you stronger, and I've learnt a lot about myself and others as a result and can thank my body for teaching me. At the start of my counselling journey this condition led me to research wellbeing on a holistic psychosomatic level (psycho: mind, soma: body) and the 4 pillars of health: emotional, physical, mental and spiritual. A more contemporary term is biopsychosocial, taking into account lifestyle, family, society and the culture we live within. No man is an island. For this reason I work with clients in a holistic way, integrating all aspects of health and wellbeing in the search for greater peace of mind.

Out of this interest, from 2002 I developed the THREAT© Programme for Anger and Stress and have delivered it to groups, couples and individuals throughout Manchester and Salford. It became the focus of my Masters dissertation in 2008. Whether you find it difficult to manage your own anger or struggle to cope with someone else's, this model can help.

The 10-week course is still available to groups by arrangement and has been adapted for couples, family and individual therapy.

The longer I work the more I believe that good mental and emotional wellbeing is bolstered by self love. Striving for it through developing self esteem and inner confidence is certainly proven to be an effective weapon in the armoury against depression and anxiety. Maybe there are issues of co-dependency (when your mood is overly affected by some other person or a compulsive behaviour), or perhaps you are experiencing the 'Good Girl/Boy' syndrome (where you find it difficult to say no, to express negative emotions, feel you have no control, and smile when you feel like crying).

As above, the 'shoulds' introjected (subconsciously taken on) in childhood often burden us with other people's values that we find difficult to live up to in adult life. That inner voice telling us we should work harder, look better, be better. The consequences can wreak havoc on our self confidence and authentic way of being, always trying to be something we're not, instead of being content just being who we are. Inner child work is a wonderful way of exploring and releasing us from those life principles and allowing us the space to develop our own.    

Whoever we are, whatever we have or don't have, we are all different and we all at times doubt ourselves. That is what it means to be human. Whatever your issues, you are not alone. You're not 'crazy' and neither are you 'bad' or 'wrong'! These are all issues that can be worked on successfully within the counselling environment.

Counselling
Individual, family or couples therapy. I work from my home therapy room and can now offer face-to-face or virtual sessions via Zoom

£50 per 1 hour session

£30 per 1 hour session for Counselling Students completing the required personal therapy hours

Some concessionary places may be available for those on benefits or unwaged (with evidence)

Supervision
£50 per hour for qualified counsellors

Hypnotherapy

I  offer a 3 session plan costing £150:

• A thorough initial consultation including history-taking, brief therapy and relaxation (lasting around 90 minutes)
• Hypnotherapy session in full (lasting around 90 minutes)
• Follow-up hypnotherapy session (lasting around 60 minutes)

Ethical clinical practice determines a minimum of 2 sessions to take a full history and assess the appropriateness of using hypnotherapy. Between the first and second sessions, I write a bespoke script personalised to your individual requirements based on the information you have given. The third session is used to reinforce and strengthen previous therapeutic messages. If you do not require a final session, I offer a 2-session plan for £100.

Group Work
I also work with groups. If you have a group of friends or colleagues who might benefit from developing assertiveness, building confidence, raising self-esteem, or managing anger or stress, I can develop a bespoke psychotherapeutic* training package designed to fit your individual needs. Counselling is recognised as a form of teaching and learning and this is perhaps a more cost-effective - and fun - way of working.

I am happy to provide testimonials, with permission from people I have worked with previously.

*psychotherapeutic education - defined as that which addresses both the emotional and educational needs of the client.

Contact me for a no-obligation friendly chat to find out whether I can provide what you are looking for.

I'm 5 minutes from the Trafford Centre
Junction 11 (Eccles/Irlam turn off) M60

Each one of us is unique, and I don't believe in a 'one size fits all' approach where one model is used with every client. Everything is connected - including us - and nothing is new. This is why I work as an integrative counsellor, psychotherapist and trainer founded in humanistic Rogerian principles.

This means I combine aspects of mainstream counselling and psychotherapeutic theories and techniques in the way I work - Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Transactional Analysis (TA), Multimodal, Psychodynamic, Inner Child Work, Gestalt, Existentialism and Hypnotherapy. I would be happy to talk further about this when we meet.

I am a member of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) and abide by their Codes of Conduct and Ethics. I hold an enhanced DBS disclosure.

And finally... I work from home and own a dog. Our friendly 10 year old Schnauzer/Shi Tzu cross, Tilly, will also welcome you to our home and, whilst she is well-behaved, she will be present in the counselling room. She loves company too much not to be!  

I look forward to hearing from you.