Thinking of ghosting your therapist? Consider this instead
Committing to therapy can be a big step. It's an experience which may be brand new to you as the client.

Therapeutic boundaries
Therapy is a relationship of boundaries, possibly more boundaries than you may have experienced in other areas of your life. This offers clarity and a safe, appropriate space to work through issues. For example, a therapy appointment differs from a meet-up with a friend or family member, where it may be more acceptable to cancel by text at the last minute.
When embarking on therapy it’s important to remember that the therapist has set aside time for you and if you have signed a contract you have committed to this. It’s also important to consider that this is how the therapist makes a living. They are a human with bills to pay just like you. Applying consideration and respect to them by paying on time, showing up and communicating in advance if changes need to be made to your appointment not only builds the relationship, it helps you get the most out of your therapy.
What might also differ in this relationship compared to others you may have is that your therapist will be receptive to your honest, open feedback. If you are feeling uncomfortable about any aspect of the process, this is helpful information to share with your therapist and discuss how they may support you more effectively.
Challenging moments
Therapy is not always a comfortable process, although your therapist should be able to hold space for you as you work through this in a non-judgmental way. Sometimes you may come up against your own resistance in the process.
It can be tempting to give up at this point. Sometimes issues examined in the therapy room can alert you to something which may alter your worldview, and in that moment you may feel that it would be insurmountable to tackle this and make the changes needed in your life.
Breaking through or closing down
Difficult as it may seem, if you are ready and willing, this is often an optimal time to dig in and explore in your sessions. As therapists, we realise that you might not be ready for this. We meet you where you are and go at your pace.
Your decision might be to quit, and this could be a daunting thing to raise with your therapist. Perhaps for fear of repercussions, or bad memories of other interactions where this may have happened might be haunting you. Perhaps you fear confrontation or have been encouraged to avoid it. Perhaps you feel it's better for all involved to vanish from attending your sessions, the ghost of your therapist's past.
And hey, if you do, no judgement, we do get it. But if this does happen to you at any point in the process, I urge you to try something new.
An invite to open up
Therapists are open to your feedback, and in the space, these doubts you may be feeling can be worked through. It can even be a safe environment to try out confronting an issue, to a willing audience. Working through it here could be life-changing for the better, equipping you with new skills and tools for resilience.
In session, you may agree with your therapist to take a break or stop attending. Or you may discuss what you need to continue challenging your resistance and tackling your areas of struggle.
Don't ghost, communicate!
It's worth remembering that there are lots of mediums of communication available to you to share how you are feeling with your therapist these days. You might decide to send an email or text, give us a call, or tell us in an online, face-to-face or walking session. This is more effective than disappearing. It helps us know where you are at so we can get the most out of your therapeutic experience. Whatever happens next.
