How to feel more prepared for an initial therapy consultation

What is an initial therapy consultation?

Initial therapy consultations are typically offered free of charge and last between 15 and 30 minutes, conducted over the phone or via video call. That being said, if you have a preference to ‘meet’ your therapist more officially (ie, via video call), make sure to ask the question.

These meetings are brief and offer the therapist a chance to share a bit about the way they work, build rapport and understand your needs, but most importantly, they offer you the space to learn more about them and gauge if they are the right fit.

It’s important to remember these are not a therapy session, and though therapists are trained to support you in opening up, it isn’t necessary for you to disclose everything right away.

You may find that you ‘click’ with a specific therapist, or that one consultation feels ‘right’, and as much as this information can be useful, I generally suggest that clients speak with a few different therapists so they have true points of comparison.

Initial consultations can sometimes feel rushed, and the impact of this can be off-putting. Finding a therapist can be hard enough, so these initial chats aim to reassure you, not make the process less comfortable. 

Questions to ask yourself before the consultation

You should be coming out of these calls with information, reassurance, and your questions answered. Before you speak with any potential therapist, it’s important to be clear on a few things so you can make the most of your time:

• Why am I looking to start therapy?
• Was there a specific trigger that led me here? What does this look like in my day-to-day life?
• Have I had therapy before? If so, what kind, how long ago was it, what felt useful about it, and what felt less helpful?
• Do I have any mental health conditions? For example, depression or anxiety. Please note, this is due to certain training limitations, and can ensure you are referred on appropriately if your therapist does not have this expertise.
• Was there something in particular that drew me to this therapist?

Please note that these may be asked by the therapist, but having prepared thoughts on the below may make the conversation feel more balanced

Questions you can ask a therapist

To help guide and empower you during these calls, below are some helpful starter questions which may inspire some of your own and lead to you getting the information you need during this initial point of contact.

Practical questions

• How much is your hourly rate?
• What dates and times do you work?
• Are sessions conducted online or in person?If in person, where are your offices? Is there a waiting room?
• What does a typical session look like?

About the therapist

• Have you worked with [insert concern here] before?
• What modality do you practice, and how does that look in the room?
• How do you handle it if a particular technique doesn’t work for me? 

About the work

• I am an [analytical/creative/practical, etc.] person, how could this inform the way we work together?
• Do you provide tasks or homework? How often can I expect them, and do I have to do them?
• How do you integrate cultural/racial/spiritual perspectives into your practice?

Potential “red flags” to look out for

While every therapist works differently, there are some signs during an initial consultation that may suggest the therapist isn’t the right fit for you:

• anything that makes you feel uncomfortable or unsettled
• the therapist provides a set timeline for when you will see results
• the therapist sounds distracted, or the call doesn’t seem to be taking place in a private space
• the therapist talks more about themselves rather than listening to you
• the therapist tries to get you to commit to a time slot on the phone
• the therapist doesn’t ask if you have any questions

These calls can feel a little bit strange, for many reasons: having a small amount of time to open up to a stranger, all while sussing them out, can be nerve-wracking, especially if you don’t end up working with them.

It’s easier said than done, but the more you can be yourself in this initial meeting, the better chance you have of knowing if you will feel comfortable long term. Finding the right therapist is both yours and the therapist's ultimate goal. Use the space in a way which works for you.