How counselling can help relationship issues

When thinking about our relationships there will be many different feelings about our partners and how we feel about them. This can be very confusing, and can often lead to us saying nothing and letting those issues and feeling fester till they explode or become so unmanageable you can’t even bear to consider them.

If you are in a relationship that is having difficulties you may want to change things about yourself that are impacting the relationship. You may be repeating a pattern of behaviour that you may or may not be aware of that result in relationships breaking down.

Counselling can help by allowing you to take stock of where you are in the relationship and how you want to handle it. It may be that you come to counselling wanting to save the relationship, but as you come to understand the relationship and your part in it this may change what you want to do going forwards...which is absolutely OK. The reverse of that is also absolutely OK.

By having one to one counselling you can make sense of what is going on for you, which will allow you to make some choices about how you want to proceed. In the process you can explore those thoughts and feelings that are too painful or dangerous to speak with your partner about. You can even explore how it might be to have “that” conversation with them in a safe space where you can get tongue-tied, upset, angry, or any of the other emotions you are experiencing without the fear of being judged.

You also will have someone working with you that isn’t in the thick of the relationship and that can give you a different perspective on what is going on and maybe help you gain insights into patterns of behaviour or feelings that you aren’t aware of but are driving the issue within your relationship.

Ultimately, relationships are complex things and the focus of one to one therapy or even couples therapy is to help you make the choices that are best for you.