Understanding depression: What it can feel like

We often hear people speak of feeling depressed when faced with life’s difficulties and hurdles. The word ‘depressed’ is bandied about quite freely when people experience a low mood, feeling sad or down. For most of us, this low mood or unhappiness doesn’t last long, and we are able and willing to seek support from friends and loved ones. We may try to distract ourselves by participating in some form of activity, meeting up with a friend, exercising or enjoying a hobby.

Depression can feel different from a temporary low mood or period of unhappiness. Someone experiencing depression may lose interest and motivation, and even getting out of bed in the morning or making a cup of tea can feel like a huge effort. Rather than seeking support from friends and family, some people may withdraw, becoming increasingly isolated.

Depression can be very isolating as, without something ‘physical’ to see, friends and family may find it difficult to understand. This can increase feelings of hopelessness, as constantly being misunderstood can add to the feeling of alienation. Some people explain it as being at the bottom of a dark pit or hole, with no light and no energy to even attempt to get out.

There are many feelings and emotions that someone struggling with depression may experience. These include:

• lack of motivation
• isolation
• worthlessness
• numbness
• despair
• lethargy
• hopelessness
• shame
• anger
• guilt
• feeling stuck or trapped
• loneliness
• an overwhelming feeling of sadness

How can therapy help?

Seeking help can feel like an impossible task when you are feeling so low. The very thought of picking up the phone, or even writing an email, can seem like an insurmountable task. Yet gathering the courage to do this may be an important first step towards getting support.

Therapy can help you to explore difficult emotions in a safe environment where your feelings can be valued, heard and acknowledged and where you can speak without judgement. Building a trusting relationship with your therapist may help you to begin connecting with someone again.

Where it feels relevant to what you are experiencing today, therapy may also provide an opportunity to explore difficult experiences or circumstances from your past.

You may feel as though you don’t understand what is happening or that nothing makes sense anymore. Therapy can help you begin to understand and make sense of your thoughts, feelings and emotions, while supporting you as you find your own way forward.