What do we need in order to survive and thrive? All living things need nourishment from the environment to survive. We need air to breathe, water to drink, nutritious food and sufficient amounts of sleep. These are our physical needs or ‘givens’. We also have emotional needs, which are just as important for our wellbeing. Our emotional needs
Security - a safe territory and environment that allows us to develop fully. Autonomy - a sense of control over what happens to us,...
You may have spent many years dreaming about having a baby, or perhaps this decision was only made once you or your partner became pregnant. You may be aware of all the dreams you had of what being a mother or father would look like, or perhaps it didn’t enter your mind and now you feel like you’re winging it. Parenthood is one of the BIGGEST life changes you can ever go through, and the strangest part is that no one really tells you how much of a life changer it is. Some might say...
Anxiety is a symptom of several conditions, including panic disorders, phobias, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and social anxiety disorder (SAD). The symptoms could be psychological or physical, and they can display symptoms such as a lack of concentration, trouble sleeping, dizziness, heart palpitations, or involuntary bowel issues. Some people may describe themselves as having a panic attack, which is commonly described as being unable to breathe, heart palpitations, feeling sick,...
The alarm clock sounds. It cannot be morning time again. Not again. I’m not sure that I can cope with another day; another day of this dark cloud that has filled my head. They call it depression but I don’t understand it. It controls my life and the life of those around me. How did this happen to me? Did I do something wrong? I finally pluck up the courage to sit on the edge of my bed. I don’t want to do this again today. How can I get through another day of this...
Pain is unavoidable. No matter how hard we try we really cannot escape death, illness and loss. Or even little things, rejection, things not going the way we want them to go, things going the way we don’t want them to go. Most things are outside our control. Even though modern media does a pretty amazing job convincing us of the contrary. Perhaps if we only drank more spinach smoothies, did more yoga, had better clothes and a more fulfilling job, we would be able to be happy all the...
Why do we come to therapy? Sometimes, when we feel bad or when we notice how our anxiety or depression stops us from enjoying life. When we see the effects of our compulsive or destructive behaviours, and sometimes because we feel stuck. From the point of view of Internal Family Systems (IFS), a research-backed model of therapeutic healing, the feelings and behaviours that bring us to therapy are all protecting us. What are these feelings and behaviours protecting us from? Sometimes they...
If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts, or behaviours, please seek help immediately from an appropriate professional, such as a general practitioner or, in cases of life-threatening emergencies, call 999 or visit A&E. It is a time of year that we start to think about holidays, sunshine, and enjoyment. However, one of the things that might not be on everybody’s radar at this particular time of year is the high suicide rate that encompasses our population each year. In the UK in...
Many reading this will recognise and understand the term 'black dog', but if it's new to you then it's a term some people use to describe depression. If you haven't already seen it, do have a look at the World Health Organisation video entitled 'I had a black dog and his name was depression', as I feel it so cleverly demonstates what depression can feel like. The big question, of course, is how do you shake off depression? I use that term 'shake off' because it can often feel that something is...
Crying is a uniquely human activity and an emotional one. Unlike the tears which continuously lubricate the eye or are a response to the presence of a foreign body, emotional tears exist primarily to signal a person’s need for connection. For instance, tears of joy encourage others to join the person in their happiness and celebration. Tears of sadness or distress signal that someone needs comfort or support. Unfortunately, many of us are brought up to believe that tears should be hidden....
Loneliness can be incredibly painful and debilitating, but it is one of those things that, sadly, doesn’t get talked about enough. There can be shame in loneliness, but loneliness is something that can affect anyone and everyone. As such, I feel loneliness should be talked about more. This can help to reduce the feelings of shame and also help us all realise that loneliness is part of the human condition. There are different types of loneliness. There is, of course, the type of...
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