Why do I feel so anxious? Understanding your nervous system

Once upon a time in a bustling town in the UK, lived a friendly chap named Charlie. Charlie was like many of us, juggling work, family, and social commitments while trying to keep up with the fast-paced demands of modern life. Yet, no matter how hard he tried, Charlie often felt overwhelmed, anxious, and downright exhausted.

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One day, after another sleepless night, Charlie decided he needed to understand what was going on inside his body. He wanted to get to the root cause of his mental health struggles, not just patch them up with quick fixes. And so began Charlie's journey into understanding his nervous system.


The nervous system: Your body's command centre

Charlie discovered that the nervous system is like the body’s command centre, responsible for everything from basic bodily functions to complex emotional responses. It’s divided into two main parts: the central nervous system (CNS), which includes the brain and spinal cord, and the peripheral nervous system (PNS), which connects the CNS to the rest of the body.

But what piqued Charlie's interest was the autonomic nervous system (ANS). This part of the PNS is like the body's autopilot, controlling involuntary functions such as heart rate, digestion, and respiratory rate. The ANS has two key players: the sympathetic nervous system (SNS) and the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS).

The SNS is like an alarm system, activating the "fight or flight" response when we perceive danger. On the other hand, the PNS is like a soothing lullaby, promoting the "rest and digest" response to help us relax and recover.

The magic of the polyvagal nerve

Charlie's journey took an exciting turn when he learned about the polyvagal nerve, often called the body's "superhighway." This nerve, part of the parasympathetic system, plays a crucial role in how we respond to stress and maintain emotional balance. It connects the brain to various organs, including the heart, lungs, and digestive tract, helping to regulate their functions.

The polyvagal theory, introduced by Dr. Stephen Porges, explains how this nerve helps us feel safe and socially connected. When the polyvagal nerve is functioning well, we feel calm, grounded, and ready to engage with others. However, if it's out of balance, we might experience anxiety, stress, or even shut down emotionally.


Signs of a dysregulated nervous system

Charlie started to notice how his own nervous system was reacting to different situations. He realised that many of his symptoms were signs of a dysregulated nervous system:

  • Chronic stress: Feeling constantly overwhelmed and unable to cope with everyday stressors.
  • Anxiety and panic attacks: Experiencing excessive worry, fear, or sudden episodes of intense fear.
  • depression: Persistent feelings of sadness, hopelessness, or a lack of interest in activities once enjoyed.
  • Sleep problems: Difficulty falling, staying, or experiencing restful sleep.
  • Digestive issues: Chronic digestive problems such as irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) or unexplained stomach pain.
  • Fatigue: Persistent tiredness or low energy levels, even after adequate rest.
    Getting to the Root Cause

To address these symptoms effectively, Charlie knew he needed to get to the root cause of his nervous system dysregulation. This often involves a holistic approach that considers various factors, including lifestyle, emotional health, and physical well-being.

1. Identify triggers

Stressors: Identify and manage everyday stressors that may be contributing to your symptoms.

Trauma: Address any past traumas that may be affecting your nervous system. Trauma can have a lasting impact, keeping your nervous system in a state of hypervigilance.

2. Lifestyle changes

Healthy diet: Nutrition plays a crucial role in nervous system health. Incorporate a balanced diet rich in fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and healthy fats.

Exercise: Regular physical activity helps regulate the nervous system by reducing stress hormones and promoting the release of endorphins, which improve mood.

3. Emotional regulation

Mindfulness and meditation: Practices like mindfulness and meditation can help calm the nervous system by promoting relaxation and reducing stress.

Therapy and counselling: Professional support can provide valuable tools for managing emotions and addressing underlying issues.


Practical steps to regulate your nervous system

Charlie discovered some practical steps to help regulate his nervous system and keep that polyvagal nerve in tip-top shape:

1. Practice deep breathing

Deep, diaphragmatic breathing activates the PNS, promoting relaxation. Try the 4-7-8 technique: inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 7 seconds, and exhale for 8 seconds.

2. Stay physically active

Engage in regular exercise, such as walking, yoga, or dancing. Physical activity helps release tension and boosts mood.

3. Prioritise sleep

Establish a consistent sleep routine. Aim for 7-9 hours of quality sleep per night. Avoid screens and stimulants before bedtime.

4. Connect with others

Social connections are vital for emotional health. Spend time with loved ones, engage in social activities, and seek support when needed.

5. Engage in relaxation techniques

Explore relaxation techniques such as progressive muscle relaxation, guided imagery, or aromatherapy to help calm your nervous system.


The path to healing

As Charlie began to implement these steps, he noticed significant improvements in his overall well-being. Healing is a journey, and understanding the nervous system is a powerful step towards mental wellness. By recognising the signs of dysregulation and taking proactive steps to address them, you too can create a more balanced and harmonious state of being.

Why work with a professional?

If you find yourself struggling to navigate this journey alone, seeking professional support can make a significant difference. A trained counsellor can help you uncover the root causes of your symptoms, provide effective strategies for managing stress, and guide you towards lasting healing.

Take the next step

If you're ready to take the next step towards understanding and regulating your nervous system, consider reaching out for support. A professional counsellor can help you navigate this path, providing the guidance and tools you need to achieve mental wellness.

Like Charlie, you can find your way to a healthier, more balanced life. Embrace the power of understanding your nervous system and take proactive steps towards your mental well-being. If you feel ready to explore these paths further and seek personalised guidance, counsellors are here to help. 

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The views expressed in this article are those of the author. All articles published on Counselling Directory are reviewed by our editorial team.

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Milnthorpe, Cumbria, LA7
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Written by Jacqueline Connaughton, Therapist
Milnthorpe, Cumbria, LA7

Jackie Connaughton has worked in mental health for 20 years and is a passionate advocate for mental well-being. She believes understanding the root cause empowers individuals to take control of their lives. Jackie collaborates with organisations on stress recovery, burnout prevention, energy management, and enhancing overall well-being.

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