The benefit of being accepted just as you are

Life can hold many pressures, expectations that we feel we must meet from work, family, friends, from social norms and from popular culture. It is easy sometimes to get lost in the web of what everyone else expects and wants, that we lose sight of who we are and what matters to us.

To live well, we need time to pause, to switch off, and to reflect. Time to just be, without needing to do stuff, without needing to be in touch. Counselling can offer just such a space.

Often, what clients need most is the time and space to let the layers of what everyone else wants, and what seems to be expected fall away, so that clients can begin to explore what it is that matters to them at their core. What is it they really want to give their attention and resources to? What is it that makes their heart sing?

Therapy is a place where you can be accepted for being you, just as you are. There is no requirement or expectation that you are going somewhere, becoming something, or changing. There is just quiet acceptance of you, as you are. In this, there is a sufficiency that is seldom felt in everyday life. The particular quality of just sitting, together, exploring and understanding without any need to do anything or change anything can be liberating, and itself set in process the natural evolution that emerges deep from within a client.

It is an irony that when we expect nothing, we get the most. Letting go of what is not our own, of what we think we ought to strive for or want can set us free to discover what is in our heart and body and what it is that really energises us.

Perhaps what is most needed in this hectic world is to sometimes just sit, not trying to do anything, simply being there and noticing. Doing this in the presence of another who deeply cares and is available to truly witness you is what therapy is all about.

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Darlington, County Durham, DL2

Written by Fe Robinson

Darlington, County Durham, DL2

Fe Robinson is a psychotherapist working in Durham on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Her mission is to help clients thrive, whatever their life circumstances. Fe is UKCP accredited, BACP registered and EMDR UK and Ireland accredited and offers psychotherapy, EMDR, couples counselling and supervision. For grounded, authentic support, get in touch.

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