Stress addiction - spotting the signs

Stress addiction is when you develop obsessive thoughts and compulsive patterns of behaviour (OCD) that drive you to engage in stress-inducing situations over and over again. You begin to develop an internal reward system with stress stimuli from which you derive both psychological pleasure and harm in response. This kind of stress addiction can lead to psychological burn-out, angry outbursts, depression and high anxiety levels.

Stress is both normal and healthy when it is used in critical situations to give us a boost of energy, solve challenging problems, succeed or even as a survival response to danger. But stress can eat away at us when we become hooked on tight deadlines, heavy work schedules and household chores that never seem to end. These addictive activities may even replace downtime with family, recreational activities or periods of necessary rest and recuperation.

This is where the addictive element begins to take over your life. You may notice that if you are not jumping from one stimulus or event to another your life feels empty and unsatisfying. Going cold turkey and coming down from stress states almost feels intolerable and it creates a high degree of agitation or anger. You may become anxious, irritable or short-tempered with friends, colleagues and family members, but it seems too difficult to step off the merry-go-round.

What are the signs you can identify if you are suffering from stress addiction?

Control and high expectations

• You are a perfectionist who needs to be in control, and show very little tolerance for human error, mistakes, or changes to your expectations
• You have high expectations of others and yourself and can get distressed or angry when expectations are not met

High alert

• You are often on high alert in situations which require you to solve problems, quickly adapt to change, even when minimal interventions become stress-laden.
• You are often consciously and unconsciously on the lookout for novel and exciting stimuli during downtime.
• You respond more efficiently in stressful situations, finding last-minute solutions, or meeting deadlines.
• You find yourself constantly anticipating problems or catastrophes for no particular reason.

Obsession, compulsion & repetition

• You overthink even the smallest details in mundane situations with very little sense of satisfaction once a task is completed
• You feel an obsessive or compulsive need to solve problems and often find yourself planning ahead with several alternative versions plan A, plan B, plan C, etc.
• You get a surge of confidence or power rush when you engage in critical situations with high levels of stress, when others seem to fold under the pressure
• You quickly move on to the next task after completing a stressful activity.

Social engagement and difficulties

• You do not trust other people to complete a task efficiently without your supervision or input.
• You feel unable to engage in the present moment, be at peace during times of rest, recuperation, or recreation
• You have disturbed sleeping patterns, wake in the middle of the night, or suffer from
• An obsessive need to validate your self-worth by proving yourself as high-achieving or pleasing others
• A compulsive need to solve other people’s problems for them

It may feel easier to remain highly charged and ready for any eventuality rather than acknowledge the toll stress plays in your life and start the process of winding down. This is where stress addiction not only drives compulsive behaviour but also becomes a bio-chemical stimulus in the body which is almost impossible to resist.

As well as high levels of adrenalin and cortisol which boost our energy and relieve us of pain, the body also releases high levels of dopamine under stressful conditions. This chemical acts as a reward for the brain and body when learning repetitive behaviours. It is also a key ingredient in habit formation, as it reinforces addictive patterns of behaviour. Initially, these psychological rewards are pleasurable.

They give us a surge of power, a rush of confidence and a sense of invincibility. But with chronic stress cortisol and adrenalin begin to eat away at the body’s energy reserves, immune system and can cause cardiovascular disease. This is when you need to spot the triggers and early warning signals that you have an unhealthy relationship with stress.

It is important to slow down, pause and regularly pay attention to the triggers and stimuli that cause you to engage in a cycle of stress addiction. This means putting time aside to observe the sensory or emotional stimuli that trigger these repetitive responses. Once you have identified the triggers you can begin the process of withdrawal, stress-regulation and reengaging with other more healthy activities, as well as move towards rest and safety.

Triggers for stress obsession, compulsion and addiction

• Being alone and lacking stimulation
• Tiredness, lethargy and fatigue (a lack of energy or drive)
• Long periods of abstinence from stress-induced situations
• FOMO (fear of missing out) in high-stimulus situations
• Notifications on phones, sounds, timers, bleeping lights, incoming message setting
• Surfing the phone or internet, while obsessively searching for information or news without any sense of purpose
• Low stimulus environments, periods of boredom and quiet moments alone
• Engaging in too many high-risk or critical situations and then going cold turkey

Once you have identified your triggers for stress addiction, you can work out a set of techniques for disengaging and reducing stress in my article: Stress addiction – regulating and reducing stress.