Double whammy: Balancing puberty while handling menopause stress

If there's a teen or nearly teenager in your house, there's likely also someone experiencing perimenopause or menopause. Welcome to the double whammy of menopause and puberty!

Both of these stages can be pretty emotionally turbulent. So, how can you help manage stress levels for both you and your tween or teenage child?

Understanding hormonal changes

During puberty, hormonal changes can mean mood swings, increased sensitivity and identity formation as 'a teenager'. 

Similarly, hormonal fluctuations during perimenopause and menopause can result in hot flushes, mood swings and sleep disturbances. 

Both stages can be challenging for you, your child and those around you. The shared challenges of irritability, anxiety and mood swings can all too easily lead to misunderstandings and increased stress within the household.

Effective communication strategies

Now is the time to improve your communication strategies. Open and honest communication between parents and teens is crucial. Practice actively listening when your kid talks about their feelings or frustrations. Put down distractions and fully focus on what they are saying. You can use your own experiences of shifting hormones to respond with empathy. 

Setting aside regular times to check in with your teen to discuss feelings and challenges. Depending on your teen and how they respond, you can agree on a specific time together or set a regular reminder for yourself to check in (nonchalantly). You might initially get a terse or sarcastic response, but believe me, they will appreciate it!

Stress management techniques (for them and you)

• Deep breathing exercises and mindfulness: Practice these together to build bonds and relieve mutual stress.
• Physical activities: Go for a walk or practice some at-home yoga to help build bonds and provide mutual stress relief.
• Structured daily routines: Create structured daily routines to provide stability and reduce stress. Routine and structure are useful for everyone.
• Healthy lifestyle habits: Ensure good sleep hygiene, balanced nutrition, and regular physical activity.

 If stress and emotional turbulence become overwhelming, it's important to seek professional help. Counselling, therapy, and support groups are all great sources of support. 

Looking after yourself

Looking after yourself is not a luxury but a necessity. When you take care of yourself, you're better able to be there for those around you. Think of the oxygen mask on a plane; you have to put it on yourself before you check that those around you have theirs on. Plus, it sets a great positive example for your teenage kids. When they see you looking after yourself and showing self-compassion, they're more likely to do this for themselves.

Make time for activities that rejuvenate you, like hobbies, socialising with friends, or simply relaxing (maybe some time off social media!).

Create a supportive environment at home

Mutual respect and patience go a long way. Make time for activities that promote bonding and relaxation. These include family game nights, cooking, or simply watching a film together.

Managing stress and emotions related to life changes helps create a healthier family dynamic. You can work through these challenges more smoothly by improving communication, practising stress management techniques, taking care of yourself, and creating a supportive home environment.

Are you dealing with parenting the challenges of puberty while also experiencing perimenopause or menopause? You don't have to manage this on your own, reach out for support and find out how a counsellor can help.