Developing emotional strength during stress and anxiety 

The intricate dance of emotions! It's fascinating how our upbringing and the emotional climate at home can shape our relationship with feelings in times of stress and anxiety during adulthood. 

Growing up with emotionally avoidant parents can indeed leave a lasting impact. The struggle is real. When caregivers grapple with their own emotions or lack healthy coping mechanisms, it can inadvertently teach us to suppress our feelings, too. It's like inheriting an emotional toolkit with missing tools. It's no wonder we sometimes feel ill-equipped to handle our inner world.

Emotional resilience is like having a trusty lifeboat in the stormy sea of life. It won't prevent the waves from crashing, but it helps you stay afloat in times of stress and anxiety while navigating adversity. Let's dive into the depths of this fascinating concept:

• The ripple effect: When parents avoid emotions, it sends a message that feelings are unsafe or unwelcome. As kids, we absorb this implicitly. We might learn to hide our vulnerability, fearing rejection or judgment.
• Emotional literacy: If our parents didn't model emotional expression, we might struggle to identify and label our feelings. It's like navigating a foreign city without a map, and you feel lost.

Definition and essence of emotional resilience 

Emotional resilience is your inner strength. It's the ability to bounce back after life throws a curveball. Imagine being that rubber duck in a bathtub. You bob right back up no matter how hard you're pushed down.

It's not about invincibility but acknowledging your brokenness and choosing to grow in adversity. Resilience whispers, "Hey, I might feel challenged, but I'm still here."

The 3 elements of emotional resilience

1. Self-belief: Picture a tiny voice inside you saying, "You've got this!" Self-belief is about trusting your ability to handle whatever comes your way.
2. Self-compassion: Imagine wrapping yourself in a warm, understanding hug. Resilience isn't about being tough; it's about being kind to yourself when life gets tough.
3. Enhanced cognition: Think of it as mental agility. Resilient minds don't get stuck in a loop of despair. They adapt, reframe, and find new paths forward.

How to build emotional resilience

• Learn from adversity: Each setback is a lesson. Reflect on what you've overcome before. You're more resilient than you realise.
• Self-connection: Feeling disconnected from our emotions can lead to a sense of emptiness. We might seek external distractions (hello, TV binge!) rather than facing what's inside.
• Cultivate social connections: Friends, family, or even a friendly barista connecting with others provides emotional scaffolding.
• Practice mindfulness: Ground yourself in the present moment. Breathe. Notice. Accept. Move forward.
• Develop problem-solving skills: Channel your inner detective. Break down problems, seek solutions, and adapt.
• Maintain physical health: Sleep, exercise, and nourish your body. A well-fuelled engine runs smoother.
• Find meaning and purpose: Even in chaos, seek purpose. What lights your fire? Pursue it.
• Laugh (a lot): Laughter is resilience's secret handshake. It reminds you that joy exists even in tough times.

Remember:

Resilience isn't about denying pain but acknowledging it and choosing growth. You're not alone; we're all navigating life's upheavals.

How do you weather life's storms? 

Breaking the cycle

The good news? Awareness is the first step. Recognising patterns from our upbringing allows us to choose a different path consciously. Therapy, mindfulness, and self-compassion can help us build emotional resilience.

Have you found ways to navigate this emotional landscape? You may have discovered tools or practices that help you embrace your feelings without feeling overwhelmed. 

And hey, if you ever need a chat about emotions during your stress and anxiety, counsellors are here to help! 

The Latin root of "resilience" is resilient, which means "to bounce back." Emotional resilience is our superpower to withstand stress, adapt, and keep sailing even when the waves get choppy.

Take care.