Coming to terms with our past

Sometimes we experience something which has had a severe impact on our lives and on our feelings.

Such experiences or events may have occurred recently or many years ago. When we are unable to process our memories sometimes we develop unwanted symptoms. We may find ourselves reliving our traumatic event by having flashbacks or seeing distressing images. We may also experience physical sensations such as trembling or pain.

Constant negative thoughts about our experiences can lead us to keep asking ourselves the same old questions. We keep searching for an answer but seem unable to find a solution. All of which can prevent us from coming to terms with the event which continues to get in the way of us being able to move on.

We may wonder why the event took place and if there is anything we could have done to stop it. These thoughts can lead us to feeling guilty or ashamed. We may find ourselves attempting to avoid thinking about the situation or avoiding certain places and people.

We may avoid talking to anyone about our experiences. Some of us cope by pushing such memories to the back of our minds and distract ourselves with work or hobbies. This may help in the short term.

We may become emotionally numb - we try to feel nothing at all. This way of coping can lead to isolation and withdrawal. In turn, this can lead us to abandoning things we used to enjoy.

Therapy can help us to process our memories so they are less troublesome - enabling us to see a clearer path ahead. In a supportive and confidential environment we can unburden ourselves in a way we may feel we have been unable to do since our traumatic experience took place.

And when we do seek help, we often find ourselves beginning to feel less anxious, less fearful and less depressed.

Counselling Directory is not responsible for the articles published by members. The views expressed are those of the member who wrote the article.

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Written by Lyn Reed, MA,MBACP(reg),Pro.Adv.Dip.PC, Pgd.Cert in Clinical Supervision

I offer a professional, confidential counselling service. I've acquired considerable expertise and knowledge having worked in the social care field for many years. Having experienced ups and downs myself I understand life's road can be rocky!

I offer a good value high quality service especially for those living with anxiety and stress.… Read more

Written by Lyn Reed, MA,MBACP(reg),Pro.Adv.Dip.PC, Pgd.Cert in Clinical Supervision

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