A perspective session for New Year success

What is a perspective session? It comes under the understanding of single session therapy or coaching. And can be perfect for a new year’s change.

Around this time we often have the groan of New Year’s resolutions conversation raising its head. The reason for the ‘groan’ is that we know more often than not that these declarations fall by the wayside by the time the third week of January has hit? So why do we make them? Why put in the effort to only fail or deny we were ever taking them seriously in the first place?

Change

Most of us want to improve ourselves in some way, or if not improve, to change some aspect of our life. A new year often highlights the passing of time, things not achieved in the past year, or what we’d like for the year to come. So the intention behind our resolutions is positive.

When a company makes a five-year plan or projections for success, it invites staff together to create something with a full deck of information for outcome success and feasibility. Yet, when we articulate these desires to ourselves, it’s all a bit haphazard and random. This is where a clarity or perspective session can truly add to the personal success of a new year’s aspiration. 

What exactly happens in this session? 

First of all, it’s an extended session. There’s no bell waiting to ‘ding’ you out of your vision. You get the time you need for your consideration to be expanded. I often explain that trying to interpret one’s own dreams or challenges can be like reading a book in a mirror - it can be hard to read properly and, consequently, you’re setting yourself up for hazy times. A perspective session helps you clear away the debris of the year gone so you can step forward with the tools you need for success.

We examine the challenges that you may encounter but importantly we also dig underneath as to why you want this change. Oftentimes this can reveal a different way to get what you really want. For instance, I had a client who wanted to lose weight. Our perspective session revealed that she was just really unhappy in her relationship. We worked together to change her vision. She chose this to being single, going on holiday with her girlfriends, looking tanned and having fun. Ultimately it was so much easier to lose weight when she thought of her future that way, rather than being stuck in the rut that she knew deep down she wanted to get out of. She tagged me in her Instagram a few months later. Healthy with all the smiles! Dream achieved.

Comfort zone

Change can be scary. Getting out of your comfort zone can be difficult. Like going on holiday but never getting out of the airport. Change can be difficult, but in your perspective session, you get to fully explore the other side of the coin too - what it’s like not to make that change. With a decision clarified we then move on to discovering if this goal, this change is achievable or just pie in the sky.

I’m a fan of BJ Fogg and his Tiny Habits philosophy; ‘starting small makes lasting change easy’.  For instance, lots of people want to get fit for the new year. With such a sedentary and netflixing year, this desire is shaping up to be on more people’s list than usual! Taking a leaf out of BJ Fogg’s book - you start small.

Let’s say you want to do 20 push ups a day. Well, in our session we’d first work out the why and the alternatives but if we’re still at the 20 pushups we go to the how. We’d start with, say just two pushups every day. That’s it! Because if we can get you to get out of bed and just do two, that’s easier than the mountainous idea of doing 20 while you’re snuggled up under the duvet for your final five minutes before work! Just two. Because if you can do two, chances are you may do three!

I had a client who wanted to go to the gym more. We focused on her just having her shoes in her bag. Not even having to go to the gym. We moved on to her dropping in and using the cafe there. Eventually, with that routine feeling good, getting onto the gym bike, then, wasn’t that difficult.

It’s your time

The most important thing about a perspective session is the recognition that everyone is different and that a cookie-cutter plan is not going to work for everyone. It has to be about you. And what’s better than having a whole session to yourself that’s all about you and what you want? One that will lead to you actually getting there as opposed to saying ‘next year’!

Counselling Directory is not responsible for the articles published by members. The views expressed are those of the member who wrote the article.

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London, W10

Written by Fiona Austin

London, W10

I specialise in Anxiety related issues. This can be anything from relationships to work, something from your past or something happening now like social, stress, decisions, health concerns or fears. It can be a one-off anxiety, like starting a new job, getting married or divorced or just something new going on in your life.

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