A journey into inner space

Is anxiety, anger, shame, waging a war on your sense of self? Are the voices of judges and juries holding court in your head making their unique contribution to the pain and the turmoil?

This discourse is an attempt to circumvent this turmoil and explore the rich resources within us all and find another way of being.

Although negative emotions don’t account for the whole of us, when hooked into streams of recycled drama, they can account for more of us than we want or like.  

I know the biggest mistakes I make are when I am exhausted, over sensitive, vulnerable, of when I miss out on an opportunity. The speed and ability of disparate parts to assemble and subsume reality at times like this completely disarm me.

Benjamin Franklin said there are three things that are extremely hard: steel, diamonds, and to know oneself. Finding a way to navigate past parts of ourselves that we create, and parts that have been created for us, might extricate us from the grip of cumulative bad decisions. It might accelerate the process of relocating to a steadier space. I believe the most robust companions for this journey are self-compassion and curiosity!

Neurological research tells us that habits are the brain's way of saving energy. I wonder if sometimes in a bid to rid ourselves of uncomfortable thoughts and feelings we develop the habit of cutting and editing out parts of our lives we’d rather not experience, inadvertently creating our own seedbeds of anxiety?  

As human beings we are the only species with the capacity to stand outside ourselves and observe ourselves. This is known as bio-chemistry of the mind. Developing a conscious connection to the ability to see ourselves in the third person could give us the advantage of experiencing ourselves outside of our wants and needs.   

Distance lends perspective, my Irish Granny used to say and learning happens when we get a bird’s eye view of ourselves. There is a metaphor for this bird’s eye view. It identifies the part of us which sees us as separate from, rather than embedded in turmoil. It portrays our thoughts, feelings as ever changing weather, and the birds eye view (often known as the observing self,) as the sky, which high above the drama remains constant, unchanged, and fundamental. It might also be worthwhile mentioning here, that when a beautiful sunset stops us in our tracks, the silent, still space we connect with is the observing self.

In the course of these ruminations, I stumbled across the seven steps. At this junction anything that helped me to reinstate a right relationship with myself and to find the balance and humour which over the years seemed to have slipped away, was welcome.

  • Approach each day with the wonder and curiosity of a child.
  • Forgive mistakes big or small, my own and others.
  • Show gratitude in good moments, and grace in bad.
  • Practice compassion and be grateful for what I learn.
  • Make peace with my imperfections.
  • Embrace my own and other’s vulnerability.
  • Nurture dignity and worth in everyone.

The steps appeared to me to be less of a destination, and more a way of being, to renewed from the inside rather than out and invite us not see the world as it is, but rather to see how we are in the world.    

They say that intuition requires, we still our minds, until the beauty of things older than creation find us. I was curious about the appearance of the Steps; at the same time, I was wary of them becoming either a yoke or an embellishment.

I could see that the steps were simple but not easy. I wondered if I had the strength to hold us, the capacity to find the rich resources, which lie largely latent in all of us. Would they have the sufficiency to allow an inner shift of direction needed for this whole new way of being?

Simple but not easy!

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Written by Yvonne Fitzpatrick-Grimes MBACP Psychotherapist

I'm Yvonne, an experienced Counsellor and Psychotherapist with a solid academic background in Psychotherapy. From a wealth of experience I will help you make informed choices about what you want to achieve, in a way that honours who you are, and what you have to offer.… Read more

Written by Yvonne Fitzpatrick-Grimes MBACP Psychotherapist

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