Graham Lee - EFT Couples Counsellor/Therapist
I SPECIALISE IN WORKING WITH COUPLES
You might be asking yourself: Why do I feel so alone in this relationship? Why is she/he so distant or angry? How can I ever trust her/him again after an affair? Why don't we have time for each other anymore? How can we stop arguing?
I have 25 years experience as a psychotherapist, counsellor and coach. I specialise in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), helping people to transform painful patterns of blame and withdrawal into safe and loving emotional connection. Our closest relationships can be the source of our greatest joys, but also our deepest pain. Whether you are angry, numbed out, confused, or feeling hopeless about your relationship, EFT for couples can transform your relationship. Research studies have found that 70-75% of couples undergoing EFT successfully move from distress to recovery, and approximately 90% show significant improvements. This recovery is also quite stable and lasting, with little evidence of relapse back into distress.
THE EFT APPROACH
I work with couples to help them recognise the negative cycles of complaining and defending that typically occur, strategies that we all tend to adopt when the safety of our closest relationship is threatened. We either cope by battling for connection, or by cutting off to protect ourselves from the pain. When these negative cycles occur it feels as if there is no way out. I will support you to recognise this negative cycle; to slow down so that you each feel more safe, more able to tune into your own emotions, and able to speak from the heart. The healing in your relationship occurs when you feel that your partner is more available to you; that what is most important to you can be shared and received, and that you are valued and special to each other.
THE FIRST STEP
The first step is to get in touch by phone or email. I offer a 20 minute, free, initial introductory telephone conversation to explore your situation, and if I think I can help then we will arrange to meet for an initial session. In this session we will explore what you are looking for, and decide if we feel comfortable working together.
If we decide to start working together it is important to build a sense of continuity and regularity in our work if you are to gain the full benefits of this approach. Although the journey of couple counselling is bumpy at times, it is by sticking with it and working through some of the more difficult patches that true breakthroughs occur. For this reason I will encourage you to find a regular, weekly time, and to protect that time in your diaries as best you can.
FACE-TO-FACE or by SKYPE/ZOOM
Where possible I work face-to-face, but it is also possible to work using video conference, and some couples find that a combination of face-to-face and Skype makes it easier for them to maintain regular sessions.
I work from two locations: Craven Street in central London, close to Charing Cross Station, and Chalfont St Peter in Bucks.
Training, qualifications & experience
- BSc degree in Experimental Psychology (1st class)
- Member of the British Psychological Society
- Psychoanalytic psychotherapist (Association for Group and Individual Psychotherapy)
- UKCP registered psychoanalytic psychotherapist
- Imago Relationship Therapy Training for Couples (Harville Hendrix)
- Member of ICEEFT (International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples)
- Mindfulness Teacher Training (Oxford Mindfulness Centre)
- Mindful Self-Compassion Teacher Training (Sussex Mindfulness Centre/NHS Sussex Partnership
- NARM advanced clinical training in working with trauma (Laurence Heller)
- Neuroscience of attachment (Dan Siegel)
- Founding member of APECS (The Association for Professional Executive Coaching and Supervision)
- Member of the Association of Business Psychologists
Registered / Accredited
Being registered/accredited with a professional body means an individual must have achieved a substantial level of training and experience approved by their member organisation.
UK Council for Psychotherapy
The UK Council for Psychotherapy (UKCP) is a leading professional body for the education, training and regulation of psychotherapists and psychotherapeutic counsellors. Its register is accredited by the government's Professional Standards Authority.
As part of its commitment to protect the public, it works to improve access to psychotherapy, to support and disseminate research, to improve standards and to respond effectively to complaints against its members.
UKCP standards cover the range of different psychotherapies. Registration is obtained by training or accrediting with one of its member organisations, or by holding a European Certificate in Psychotherapy. Accredited by the Professional Standards Authority.
Accredited register membership
Accredited Register Scheme
The Accredited Register Scheme was set up in 2013 by the Department of Health (DoH) as a way to recognise organisations that hold voluntary registers which meet certain standards. These standards are set by the Professional Standards Authority (PSA).
This therapist has indicated that they belong to an Accredited Register.
Areas of counselling I deal with
Please contact me to discuss your circumstances and to fees