How to build self-esteem

How you feel about yourself can affect your mood, attitudes, thoughts and relationships. When you look in the mirror – how do you feel about the person looking back at you? Those with low self-esteem tend to have distorted views of themselves, and these views rarely have anything to do with what other people really think of them.

Whether the attitudes surrounding your self-esteem are positive or negative, they are likely to be products of a lifetime, imprinted on your mind due to certain experiences. So, if low self-esteem is an issue you struggle with – how can you change?

Recognise the problem

Recognising that the way you feel about yourself is holding you back is an important first step. It may sound easier said than done, but only you have the ability to shift your perceptions, so try not to avoid the issue – own up to it and make a commitment to change.

Reflect on why you feel this way

Take some time to reflect on why you have these distorted perceptions of yourself. Ask yourself why you really feel this way. Understanding the sources of your insecurity through self-examination is a great step towards healing. You may find this process easier with someone else’s input – consider speaking to a counsellor to help you through this.

Learn more about yourself

Once you start to ask the important questions like this, you can start to get to know yourself better. Explore your likes, your dislikes and your values. Consider which areas you see as ‘shortcomings’ and get comfortable in your own skin. Recognising your uniqueness will help you tap into your potential.

Understand that nobody is perfect

Throughout this self-exploration, you will discover that no one is perfect. You may also come to realise that the parts of you that are different and unique are the very traits other people admire about you. Dealing with your perceived imperfections will help you be stronger mentally.

Ultimately it is yourself who has to take the first step towards high self-esteem. When you transfer the energy you normally use holding back thoughts and feelings into something more positive – you will feel a huge weight lifted from your shoulders.