Marian Holmes, Child and Adolesent Counsellor/Psychotherapist
Part Of The East Surrey Counselling Group
01737823103 / 07926 190132
Hi. My name is Marian and I've worked with children and young people in various capacities for most of my life. I know that many young people struggle to achieve their potential if they are worried about things in school, at home or elsewhere. Often they keep anxieties to themselves, not wanting to worry mum or dad, make the problem worse, cause a problem for a friend etc.. But this can cause problems for them as buried fears and worries don't just go away. Counselling can provide a safe, neutral and non-judgemental space for the young person to explore feelings or painful events and to try to make sense of them, thus empowering them to cope better.
For younger children, play is a natural part of life through which they learn essential skills of relating, and creating and solving problems. Inner conflicts can be explored at a safe distance and at the child's own pace, through toys, dolls and other play materials available in the room; I provide support not only with a reliable, non-judgemental presence, but through reflection and interpretation of what I see and feel. In this way, the Unconscious is brought gently into Consciousness where it can be thought about and assimilated into everyday life.
For others, talking may be preferable or more appropriate, but sometimes drawing or writing provides a useful medium for communication too. Once again, the aim is to be able to bring difficult feelings and experiences into Consciousness and think about them.
Some young people and/or their parents or carers may not wish to have school-based counselling or sessions during school time, for many reasons. Missing academic lessons each week may actually create more stress for the student, or they may fear being the object of teasing or bullying if there is a stigma attached to seeing a counsellor. I can offer after-school, early evening or Saturday sessions if this is preferable so please do contact me to discuss this.
I offer a free telephone consultation during which we can discuss the presenting issues. If you decide to take the process further, a face-to-face assessment will take place over three 50 minute sessions with combinations of parent(s)/carer and young person. I will, at times, observe interactions between those present and at other times, interact with you, gaining some insight into interpersonal relationships as well as learning about what you perceive to be the difficulties you are facing. Building a relationship between counsellor/therapist and client is essential for the therapeutic work to have an effect, so this would be a good time to assess this. Additionally, it is important to discuss whether the type of therapy I offer is right for the young person or whether some other type of therapy might be better. It is important to have a full understanding of what is involved in therapy before beginning, as ending before the client is ready can be a painful experience.
I hope this information is helpful to you in deciding whether or not you would like me to work with your child. If you have any questions, please do contact me for further information. I look forward to speaking with you.
Training, qualifications & experience
I have an MSc in Psychodynamic Counselling and Psychotherapy with Children and Adolescents from Birkbeck, University of London. I have worked as a volunteer counsellor with Place2Be in Croydon Primary Schools and am excited about building a private practice in my local area. I have also had many years experience of personal psychotherapy, which, in my opinion, has been an essential part of my journey and training. Knowing ourselves as fully as we can enables us to support others in their journey; knowing what it is like to be "on the couch" builds understanding of, and empathy towards clients in our care.
Prior to training in this field, I worked for 19 years as a school teacher with Nursery - Year 8 children and a tutor to young people up to the age of 16, many of whom were "school refusers", "Looked After Children" or refugees. I still work part-time as a tutor and piano teacher.
A few years ago, I was tutoring a 16 year old child in a foster placement. At first she wouldn't stay in the room with me without her carer present, but gradually she began to trust me, until in session 7, she played me a song she had written. The following week she showed me a scrapbook of poems she had written about her childhood experiences. It was beautifully illustrated and I felt deeply moved that she now trusted me enough to share this with me. I look back on that young person and the relationship that developed as being my final impetus for training as a Child and Adolescent Counsellor/Psychotherapist, and one that embodies my philosophy of the therapist/client relationship.
Areas of counselling I deal with
- Anger management
- Antisocial personality disorder
- Attachment disorder
- Avoidant personality disorder
- Borderline personality disorder
- Carer support
- Child related issues
- Chronic fatigue syndrome/ME
- Dependent personality disorder
- Domestic violence
- Eating disorders
- Family issues
- Learning difficulties
- Low self-confidence
- Low self-esteem
- Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD)
- Obsessive-compulsive personality disorder
- Paranoid personality disorder
Other areas of counselling I deal with
Children and Adolescents perceive and experience events in ways specific to their age-group, developmental stage and position in the family. Childhood trauma, for example, can often lead to the child not reaching or achieving important developmental and emotional milestones. Thus, any area of counselling listed above, will need to take this into consideration when working with the young person.
Initial Telephone Consultation (Max 30 minutes) Free
Face-to-face assessment (3 sessions) £180
Counselling/Psychotherapy sessions £56 (invoiced at the end of each month)
In the case of genuine financial difficulty, fees can be negotiated within reasonable limits.
My face-to-face assessment consists of 3 sessions:
1) I meet with the parent(s)/carer(s) of the young person to take a full medical and developmental history, including presenting difficulties, reasons for exploring psychotherapy and what you hope might be the outcome of the work;
2) I meet with the parent(s)/carer(s) and the young person. In the case of a child, I will ask you to interact through play with the child in the way you would in your own home. With an older child or adolescent, I will ask you to talk together about the reasons behind exploring therapy. In either case, this allows me to observe the normal interactions and where difficulties or stumbling blocks may occur.
3) I meet with the young person on their own, allowing them the opportunity to play, talk, ask questions and explore their own experience of being in the therapy room.
Verbal feedback is usually given to parents in an additional session, charged at £56.
I am a Registered Member of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP)
Maps & Directions
Type of session
|Face to face counselling:||Yes|
I can offer after-school or Saturday sessions if this fits in better with the needs of the young person and their family.
Types of client