Trying to Understand Bereavement
Written by listed counsellor/psychotherapist: Lorraine Balfe MA MBACP (Accred.) UKRCP Reg.Ind. Counsellor/Psychotherapist
27th March, 2010
Following a bereavement, a person may be in shock. Trying to understand that the person you loved is no longer here is a very difficult process. As time goes on, the person may experience depression because they want the loved one back or to know their loved one is safe, and many people feel lost without their loved one.
Adjusting to the loss can be a long and painful process.
There may be an expectation that you 'get on with it', which often is unrealistic in a short space of time. There is no time scale for grief but generally it may be over a year before the bereaved person adjusts to life without their loved one, and for some if may be much longer.
Counselling can be beneficial as you may feel that expectations from society, friends and family to 'get on with it' can prevent you from letting your grief out. The counselling relationship can be the place where you are understood, your grief is accepted as a normal part of life and you can let some of your emotion out in a safe place. We have to be able to eventually get a balance between grief and adjustment in order to choose to accept life without the loved one and counselling can be a stepping stone to help with that process.
About the author
Lorraine Balfe works in private practice in central Stockport.
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