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How You Can Move On From Phobias, Panic Attacks, OCD, Post Traumatic Stress and Live Your Life
Written by listed counsellor/psychotherapist: John Donlon NLPA, Working with Success - Couples, Individuals and Families
30th December, 20110 Comments
In this article I use the word "phobias", but if the terms Panic Attacks, OCD, Post Traumatic Stress, resonantes with you these terms are entirely interchangeable because it is what is happening for you now and your own experience rather than label which are important, and as some people begin to read you read you may begin intuitively and even beneath the level of immediate awareness to realise how you can heal and move on with your life.
How phobias may begin?
Phobias often begin with situations where people feel they are overwhelmed and can not cope. At the time, there is often not enough support, information, nor love in the person's life, who may feel isolated and out of control. So a person may then try to begin to control their own thoughts, feelings, objects around them, other people, their own behaviour, in a way in which they try to feel safe; and somehow not to do these things leaves them feel vulnerable, alone, anxious, afraid, or terrified that something terrible is happening, or will happen.
This makes perfect sense, as the mind begins to move away from the core issues out of which feelings of stress, fear, panic, catastrophe, terror, ect. other things which may seem more managable are focused on.
This is sometimes called "dissociation," although often the original feelings are very clear and easy to recall.
And no matter how much "rational" information is added, or how much the person tells themselves what they are doing simply does not make sense, the feelings to do the relief or controlling thought(s) or activity can seem overwhelming.
The process of recovery and healing
Since phobias may develop in a person's life ata point where the person is experiencing a trauma or many traumas one after another...the person's way of surviving trauma at the time can become a life-pattern and way of trying to deal with and control many stressful situations. And the same catastrophic fears if the thoughts or behaviour is not done, or undone, may continue throughout life, for many years.
Clients who have healed go through a process, which takes time. This process works on different levels. They deal with their immediate thoughts and feelings as they manifest in their daily lives.
The seemingly "irrational" thoughts and feelings which may make no sense on an adult level begin to make very good sense in the light of what a person has experienced, and the age at which they experienced fearful and traumatic events, which may have had a small or massive impact upon their development as a person, their work life, their personal relationships, and how they experience the world generally, including social situations such as shopping or walking down the street.
Clients who have healed and moved forwards with their lives have addressed both their immediate experiences and what has happened to them in the past, and bridged any gap which has been there, so that the strength of their adult can take on new wisdom and information, which in turn is then communicated to the part(s) of themselves which have experienced fear, abandonment, isolation, abuse, injustice, terror ect. at whatever age and point in their lives these experiences occurred for them.
As the client meets these parts of themselves in therapy and verbal and emotional communication occurs a remarkable thing happens - the younger part of themselves begins to change - and in turn the anxieties and fears which have been driving their phobias and thoughts for so long, which they used daily to survive, begin to shift. And with shift any potential which was limited, shadowed by fear, had associations of foreboding and resistance connected with it, becomes freer.
Many clients who have healed begin to dance more, to sing more, to paint, to go water-boarding, to enjoy hiking and being in nature, are freer with their affections, can pass on the insights they have gained in their personal development to others, they are much less defended, and their relationships - if they chose - can become much more intimate, their appearance changes more in line with who they truly are, shining with natural attractiveness, and their body movements - which may have come across very differently when they had phobias, change and shift and become much more natural with a grace which is strong whether they are men or women.
The actual process is so person and unique because it follows your experience exactly, and no one else's. And likewise, the things you are drawn to do which give you enjoyment are unique to you. This is part of your self-development and self-realisation which should be celebrated.
The difference between John's approach and CBT, traditional counselling and psychotherapy, comes from years of listening and working with people who have become uniquely well in their own way, growing as a human being, without some external blueprint, but in a more holistic, organic, energetic, courageous way, which goes right down to how people experience things for themselves in their world. This is where we begin. Where change happens.
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