Grandparenting - Laughter and Tears - and how to say NO! With Love
Written by listed counsellor/psychotherapist: Diana Sandler
17th April, 2008
Like parenting, grand parenting has no training. Many people find themselves revelling in the joys and blessings of grandchildren, yet challenged and uncertain about this new role. How can we be loving grandparents, supportive parents and fulfilled individuals without feeling compromised or used? Are we grannies or nannies?
How do we cope with the changing dimensions in our lives??
How do we stop sounding like our Mothers, something we vowed never to do? How do we metaphorically put that piece of sticking tape over our mouths?
The grandchildren misbehave. There are no boundaries. And we feel put upon.
For the past ten years I have been in the process of developing a balance between the greatest joys in my life, my grandchildren, and the challenge of reaching that period of my life I am calling my Autumn Years.
Being a grandparent and a mother-in-law feels like an enormous challenge, especially as our generation of sixty plus Mums are still young in mind and body. In fact sometimes we are too fixated on looking youthful, keeping a fit body, but what about our spiritual freedom and growth.?
Thanks to my training as a Humanistic Psychotherapist and my search for some inner peace, my journey has provided a wide variety of holistic skills: yoga, meditation, reiki and kabbalah
With these added tools and support, I have helped myself to let go of unreal expectations, to create boundaries, and to be less judgemental.
Most importantly, I have let go of the negative messages I received as a child, that nothing I did or achieved was good enough. I started to develop positive self-esteem and to let go of my ego and having to be right!
This has been a long and exciting struggle with many losses to sustain and hurdles to overcome, in order to grow “older and wiser”.
Now in these autumn years my Grandchildren are paramount in my life and a special joy and relationship, like no other I have experienced.
Now I finally understand my own parents’ feelings about their
Grandchildren, and the important role of being a Grandparent
I have created a workshop to encourage, guide and support you to use tools, simple strategies and practical communication skills that will help you to have a natural easy relationship without alienating yourselves from your adult children. I aim to help you to cope with the everyday emotions and sometimes negative feelings that can come with the role of a Grandparent and being in “the second half of life”.
If you feel this workshop is for you, and you would enjoy sharing with other like-minded grandmothers, I will be running the Group on a fortnightly basis in a confidential, safe and supportive environment
You will have the confidence of how to say NO! With Love; how to appreciate the little joys in life; how to experience your life to the full; and how to let go of all the judgements you have about yourself and others.
My group offers opportunities to share our life experiences to benefit us all.
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