Anger is like the warrior
Written by listed counsellor/psychotherapist: Stefan Charidge: Dip Couns, MBACP (Accred). Qualified Supervisor & Couples Work.
27th March, 20100 Comments
Anger is a health emotion (it is what we do with it that is questionable). It informs us that a boundary or belief is not being honoured or achieved “Something is wrong”.
Anger is like the warrior, going out to kill, in service of another emotion or part of the “self”. The warrior is out on a mission for the king, loved one/s or government. But unless the warrior checks in with the reasons and other emotions, they can forget why they are doing it. The warrior doesn’t understand why their actions are not getting the job done and so chops up more and more people. Then tells themselves they are not doing it right because there is no resolution or they feel bad and so they try even harder and things escalate.
A way of working is to check in with the other emotions and see if the warrior can take a rest. To explore if there is another way of meeting your boundaries or rules and to check out if the old boundaries or rules still apply.
This reminds me of, “Lt. Hiroo Onoda”, a Japanese soldier that was posted by himself, on an island to monitor shipping and plan activities. He dutifully carried out his activities until 1972. *Twenty-nine* years after the war had ended. Is your warrior doing the same by supporting an old and out dated belief or rule that is not serving you?
Anger is around getting something you don’t want or not getting something you do want.
Behind the anger, unwanted feelings can be:
- And many more…………………………..
Or want you are not getting;
- And many more………………………….
So to help explore what may be happening for you and the motions behind the anger, look for someone who is able to work with Anger Management, in your area or globally via Skype.
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- How to communicate in situations that make us feel angry or anxious
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