Psychologists have said the way we cope with life’s little problems requires us to have realistic expectations which they have coined ‘appraisals’. If these appraisals are realistic it means we can better react to the problems which we come across in our everyday lives. However, if we hold an unrealistic and inflexible belief about ourselves it means our appraisals will not be accurate or suitable for the situation.
Many of us harbour irrational beliefs about ourselves and tend to think we ‘must’ and ‘should’ be better or do better. This only emphasises perfection and means we are constantly striving for something which is impossible to achieve.
Instead we should try to alter our appraisals and interpret and approach situations from a different perspective. For example if a colleague is very rude to you, instead of thinking that person is bad and none of your colleagues like you try to think what is happening to that person to make them act that way? We all have a choice about how we view what is going on around us.
Additionally we should also try to develop secondary appraisals, which is basically when we take a step back and think about what we can do about an event which we have appraised as stressful.
If we feel that we aren’t good at facing challenges it’s unlikely we will come up with an effective coping response.
To find out more information about coping strategies for stress please visit the original article here.